Death process-please help a grieving mother

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February

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Please help. We had to take our 5 week old baby off of life support last night. It was awful to watch this innocent being gasp for breath. I held her hand and said prayers as this was going on. As I concluded Angel of God, I said “may your guardian angel take you to heaven”. She stopped gasping immediately. However she still had a faint heartbeat and took some strained choking gasps every few minutes for about half an hour. I’d like to think she went right to heaven after we said our prayers, but her body was still physically alive. Is it possible her soul left her body after we prayed?
 
February said:
Please help. We had to take our 5 week old baby off of life support last night. It was awful to watch this innocent being gasp for breath. I held her hand and said prayers as this was going on. As I concluded Angel of God, I said “may your guardian angel take you to heaven”. She stopped gasping immediately. However she still had a faint heartbeat and took some strained choking gasps every few minutes for about half an hour. I’d like to think she went right to heaven after we said our prayers, but her body was still physically alive. Is it possible her soul left her body after we prayed?
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Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. I can’t even begin to comprehend what you’re going through.

You’re in my prayers, February.

:gopray:
 
February said:
Please help. We had to take our 5 week old baby off of life support last night. It was awful to watch this innocent being gasp for breath. I held her hand and said prayers as this was going on. As I concluded Angel of God, I said “may your guardian angel take you to heaven”. She stopped gasping immediately. However she still had a faint heartbeat and took some strained choking gasps every few minutes for about half an hour. I’d like to think she went right to heaven after we said our prayers, but her body was still physically alive. Is it possible her soul left her body after we prayed?
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My heart goes out to you, I have lost 2 babies myself so I kinda know how you feel but I didn’t have to go thru what you did. It’s all over now and they are all in God’s arms just like so many other babies. I ask my babies to pray for us and I am sure they do. It keeps me close to them in a very nice way. I also imagine my Mom holding them and loving them as she did all her children,(10) and grandchildren she had before she died.(she had plenty more afterwards!!) The baby is happy now and you can find peace in that. And remember your baby daughter loves you more than you know. And even as the pain slowly fades, your love for her will last a lifetime and on into Eternity. Do you have other children? I did and I tried to console them and help them understand why our Baby’s went to Heaven so soon. We always kept them a part of our family. In fact one of my older boys told me once he almost feels like he knew them. We named our babies and buried them ourselves, so we know where they are. Prayers for you and your family. God Bless, Memaw
 
I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your child. The Church says that when a baptised child dies before reaching the age of reason, the child is taken straight to heaven. So that is where you child is. Your child had a mission and the mission was completed and he/she is a saint in heaven. Did you get to take a photo of your child? Print it out, and place it at your home altar and ask for his/her’s intercession. You and your family are in my prayers.

About your question. I don’t know. When my relative was dying and was in comma a priest came and started praying the prayers, at the moment as he started to pray, the relative’s breathing changed immediatly. Woke up soon after to say goodbye and died.
 
Oh,my heart goes out to you and your family.May Christ be your strength and may Our Mother Mary offer you comfort and consolation,God Bless you:pray:🙏🙏
 
I’m so very sorry, February. My sincere condolences to you and your husband.

What you wrote about your baby’s last minutes is very touching. I don’t know the answer to your question, but I suspect that your feelings about your baby’s soul are true.

May God comfort you and your loved ones at this difficult time. God bless you. x
 
I am so sorry. I am saying prayers for you.

Please be assured that your baby is being loved, held, and cared for by our Lord.
 
Dearest February

What a beautiful mother you are. I am sorry for your loss. Rest assured your darling beloved baby is in God’s arms in heaven this day. You can ask God or Our Lady to give your baby a kiss and cuddle from you at any time and They will. One day you will be reunited with your baby FOREVER. AND EVER. Never to be parted again.

Your beloved baby is with you now, so so close, especially when you pray. Love cannot die. Especially the precious love of a mother and baby. Go before the Lord in Eucharistic Adoration and ask Him to give your baby a kiss from you and to give you a sign that she is in heaven. He will do that for you. He did it for me when my father died and I’m no one special. So I am confident Our Lord will do that for you.

Turn to Our Lady in Her Rosary. She is a mother and knows your pain and grief. She will console you.

May God bless and comfort you.
 
February said:
Please help. We had to take our 5 week old baby off of life support last night. It was awful to watch this innocent being gasp for breath. I held her hand and said prayers as this was going on. As I concluded Angel of God, I said “may your guardian angel take you to heaven”. She stopped gasping immediately. However she still had a faint heartbeat and took some strained choking gasps every few minutes for about half an hour. I’d like to think she went right to heaven after we said our prayers, but her body was still physically alive.** Is it possible her soul left her body after we prayed?**
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I think it’s possible.
 
I am so very sorry for your loss. Rest assured that your baby is indeed in heaven comfortably in God’s embrace. Praying for you & your family.
 
So sorry for your loss. May you be strengthened by God’s presence in this time of grief.
 
Memaw-We lost our first (and second?) children last year. Our first daughter was stillborn at 38 weeks, and likely had a twin that was miscarried very early. The causes of death for our babies were unrelated. So we are even more devastated.

Our baby had extensive brain injury, as well as a multitude of other serious issues that weren’t going to improve. We would have gladly taken care of a special needs child, but she was too sick to survive. I know she knew what was going on; she had been asleep most days recently, but was awake often yesterday. And I know her little soul was listening as we talked to her. The second I said that about her guardian angel, she stopped gasping. I hope what I think is true. I miss her so much.
 
We do not know when one’s soul actually leaves the body in the death process. However, let that tragic time pass from your thoughts in the knowledge that your child is with their Father and is waiting for you. Some God loves so much he wants them with Him immediately, bypassing the trials of this life to welcome them to His arms at once. This almost seemingly selfish demand by God gives us much grief, yet we cannot refuse Him and thus must celebrate rather than mourn. This, of course, is impossible right now; however in time you will find peace in the knowledge that Christ has saved your baby and they wait for you together.
 
February said:
Please help. We had to take our 5 week old baby off of life support last night. It was awful to watch this innocent being gasp for breath. I held her hand and said prayers as this was going on. As I concluded Angel of God, I said “may your guardian angel take you to heaven”. She stopped gasping immediately. However she still had a faint heartbeat and took some strained choking gasps every few minutes for about half an hour. I’d like to think she went right to heaven after we said our prayers, but her body was still physically alive. Is it possible her soul left her body after we prayed?
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I believe it is possible her soul left the body prior to biological functions ceasing. I work with the terminally ill and, not to get too mystical, but I have sensed people’s spirits leaving prior to the heartbeats and respirations stopping.

I would think you could take comfort that this was a possibility for your daughter.

Again, prayers will be said this evening for you, your husband and daughter.
 
I am so sorry for your loss. I am so sorry for what you went through. Prayers for you.
 
February said:
Memaw-We lost our first (and second?) children last year. Our first daughter was stillborn at 38 weeks, and likely had a twin that was miscarried very early. The causes of death for our babies were unrelated. So we are even more devastated.

Our baby had extensive brain injury, as well as a multitude of other serious issues that weren’t going to improve. We would have gladly taken care of a special needs child, but she was too sick to survive. I know she knew what was going on; she had been asleep most days recently, but was awake often yesterday. And I know her little soul was listening as we talked to her. The second I said that about her guardian angel, she stopped gasping. I hope what I think is true. I miss her so much.
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Just remember, God Loves our babies, all of them, more than we ever can. God loves you and so do your babies. HE gave you those precious moments with her before He took her to Heaven. I wouldn’t grieve over things you can’t help. I am not an alcoholic but I love the prayer they say about accepting the things you cannot change. With God’s Grace we can do that and TRUST Him in all things. Talk to Our Blessed Mother, she understands. I have always felts so close to Her and she is a Mother also. Ours as well as your babies. I find GREAT peace in knowing that God is in control, no matter the trials we have to endure while here. I have lost both parents, two babies, two husbands and 4 brothers, over the years and I trust God with them all. Don’t be afraid to cry, I tried hard not to cry at first, to be brave for the kids. But when I finally let the tears flow, I felt sooo much better. I cried with them and I think it helped them to know that Mama was sad too. God gave us tears for a reason, they are very healing, I think. I am glad you can talk about it too, that helps so much. Do you have a close friend or relative you can confide in? Visits to the Blessed Sacrament would help, if you can. I love spending time with Our Lord and telling Him all my feelings. You and your husband are in my prayers, Stay close and work thru this together and your marriage will be so much stronger. Remember, he is in pain too even tho many times men do not show it like we do. God Bless, Memaw
 
My husband passed away last November. About six hours before his last breath, I had a profound feeling come over me that his spirit had left his body. I can’t even describe what the difference was, but I couldn’t shake it. His respiratory therapist commented that she thought his spirit was probably watching us and the proceedings from above. I agreed with her. He was calm when I stroked his arm (I could tell from the monitors) or just touched him, but if I talked to him, he would get agitated. I choose to think that he was indeed spiritually in a far better place, and my talking to him brought him back to where he no longer wanted to be. Your sweet baby is in a better place and looks forward to seeing you again.

May Our Lord bless your family.
 
I can’t even get out of bed today. I hope God understands. I never miss Mass.

I am trying to focus on the fact that her pain is over and she is happy in heaven. Then I start thinking about those last moments. Death is horrible. We had to take my mom off a ventilator when she was dying of cancer, but I wasn’t emotionally strong enough to stay till the end. I hope my baby’s little soul didn’t suffer. Our other daughter died of an (unknown) infection in the womb; I know she couldn’t breathe, either, I just wasn’t aware it was even happening.

Another little baby down the hall died shortly after our daughter. It was so sad. I hope our babies’ souls left together somehow.

Please pray for us, my husband is trying his best again to help me when he needs to help himself too.
 
February said:
I can’t even get out of bed today. I hope God understands. I never miss Mass.

I am trying to focus on the fact that her pain is over and she is happy in heaven. Then I start thinking about those last moments. Death is horrible. We had to take my mom off a ventilator when she was dying of cancer, but I wasn’t emotionally strong enough to stay till the end. I hope my baby’s little soul didn’t suffer. Our other daughter died of an (unknown) infection in the womb; I know she couldn’t breathe, either, I just wasn’t aware it was even happening.

Another little baby down the hall died shortly after our daughter. It was so sad. I hope our babies’ souls left together somehow.

Please pray for us, my husband is trying his best again to help me when he needs to help himself too.
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Give yourself the right to mourn. It is a process and you cannot short circuit it. But eventually you will be able to concentrate on your own value as a mother in your child’s final moments. Why would Our Lord allow a child to suffer? You were wise to place your child into the hands of their guardian angel. The right person to take them to a loving God. Your child had no sin, no imperfections that needed purification.
Don’t let society determine the length of your family’s grieving. Give you and your husband all the time you need. Be kind to both of you. Pray to Mary our Mother for her especial care of your child.
 
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