Declining certain invitations

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KendraDZ1902

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I’m really not sure where this would go, but it has to do with family/friend relations so…

Ok, so yesterday a wife of one of my husband’s shipmates invited me to a passion party. It wasn’t a formal invite, she just Facebook messaged me. I just ignored it, instead of replying. I didn’t want to sound rude or come off that I was better than anyone. Those parties just aren’t for me. The party was tonight and obviously I’m not there, but how do I let people know that I’m not comfortable at those type parties, without sounding “holier than thou” :o
 
I think just no thank you is fine.

I went to one once, and I’m not sure I really thought too hard beforehand about what it really was. I did feel uncomfortable, especially with the sales rep being so very upfront about being single and what she did with all these things. 😦 And then talking about her 18 year old daughter becomes a sales person for them. 😦

Ugh.

I would just say no thank you from now on.
 
Just say “I would be uncomfortable”. It’s not “holier-than-thou” to prefer your private life kept private.
 
This is a sex toy pyramid scheme? Yikes!

“No, thank you” is quite enough. Luring one’s acquaintances to “parties” and then selling them stuff and trying to milk them for their friends and contacts is pretty rude, no matter what you’re selling. (Sorry, multi-level marketers.)
 
God bless you for this thread. It’s not just me then!!!

:hug1:
 
Oh dear. I’ve been invited to a couple of these parties as well, and I just can’t wrap my brain around them!! I’ve always declined the invite saying “Not for me!” or something along those lines. But, all of my friends know me pretty well and expected me to decline. I can’t help but think they invited me just to see me blush.
 
How about this…just plain…if Facebook:
Please accept my sincere regrets at not being able to join you.
I regret that I am unable to accept your invitation.
 
I actually went to one, oddly enough with a bunch of other married ladies from various churches. What’s interesting is that it was apparently geared towards mature, Christian, married ladies. So there was not a bunch of raunchy talk, etc. It was tame and mostly just addressed ways to spice up marriages. A few of the women actually started talking about things that I think they were needing to discuss with other married women. It was actually quite interesting.

Now, on the other hand…I have been invited to ones that I had a feeling were more risque. I heard some stories later and yeah…it really can be a bad mix. If you had any hesitation, you made the right choice to decline.
 
I don’t want to buy your sex toys, your 31 bags, your Books are Fun, your tupperware, your craptastic costume jewelry, or whatever brand of cosmetics you are pedaling. If that means I can’t be your friend, I obviously wasn’t your friend to begin with. Just ignore the invite or decline if she asks for an RSVP. You don’t owe an explaination.
 
Pampered Chef parties are great, though. You get free food and drink, sometimes the drink is wine. : ) The company has good receipes, so the food you are getting not run of the mill. It is made on the spot. The last party I went to had a yummy brie melt and pumpkin applespice cake. The first one I went to had home made pizza served with wine. I let my friend or family member get into the purchase mode and take home the brochere.

Party Light candle parties is another good company. That company has some beautiful candleholders. I happened to be invited to a Party Light party a few years ago right after I accepted a job offer. I bought a candleholder that I feel in love with as a way to celebrate.

I never heard the term passion party, but years and years ago I remember being someplace with my youngest sister, maybe her apartment, and not realizing something like that was about to take place. The table display was being set up at the time. Sick. I think they used to be called Lingerie Parties, but there was much more in the product line. I used to feel like there must be something wrong with me that I wasn’t into those things. But, then again, I feel like there was something wrong with someone who was.

Anyone who invites you to that type of party deserves to have their invite ignored. It’s insulting, to my mind.
 
Allegra said:
I don’t want to buy your sex toys, your 31 bags, your Books are Fun, your tupperware, your craptastic costume jewelry, or whatever brand of cosmetics you are pedaling. If that means I can’t be your friend, I obviously wasn’t your friend to begin with. Just ignore the invite or decline if she asks for an RSVP. You don’t owe an explaination.
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LOL. I love this!
 
CAROLOFTHEBELLS said:
Pampered Chef parties are great, though. You get free food and drink, sometimes the drink is wine. : ) The company has good receipes, so the food you are getting not run of the mill. It is made on the spot. The last party I went to had a yummy brie melt and pumpkin applespice cake. The first one I went to had home made pizza served with wine. I let my friend or family member get into the purchase mode and take home the brochere.

Party Light candle parties is another good company. That company has some beautiful candleholders. I happened to be invited to a Party Light party a few years ago right after I accepted a job offer. I bought a candleholder that I feel in love with as a way to celebrate.

I never heard the term passion party, but years and years ago I remember being someplace with my youngest sister, maybe her apartment, and not realizing something like that was about to take place. The table display was being set up at the time. Sick. I think they used to be called Lingerie Parties, but there was much more in the product line. I used to feel like there must be something wrong with me that I wasn’t into those things. But, then again, I feel like there was something wrong with someone who was.

Anyone who invites you to that type of party deserves to have their invite ignored. It’s insulting, to my mind.
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I LOVE Pampered Chef. Those parties are always nice and I have never had bad food, either.

It was just weird that she even invited me. We have hung out with our spouses, but we aren’t close.
I told my husband about it, and apparently she goes to those parties often. Weird.
 
I really dislike friends/family trying to sell things to me. I am sure I am not alone in that opinion. I ignore all invites for me to buy things from them to fund their multi level marketing adventures. I don’t give an explanation. I already spend my money giving gifts for major events and holidays.
 
KendraDZ1902 said:
I’m really not sure where this would go, but it has to do with family/friend relations so…

Ok, so yesterday a wife of one of my husband’s shipmates invited me to a passion party. It wasn’t a formal invite, she just Facebook messaged me. I just ignored it, instead of replying. I didn’t want to sound rude or come off that I was better than anyone. Those parties just aren’t for me. The party was tonight and obviously I’m not there, but how do I let people know that I’m not comfortable at those type parties, without sounding “holier than thou” :o
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What the heck is a “passion” party?
 
KendraDZ1902 said:
I’m really not sure where this would go, but it has to do with family/friend relations so…

Ok, so yesterday a wife of one of my husband’s shipmates invited me to a passion party. It wasn’t a formal invite, she just Facebook messaged me. I just ignored it, instead of replying. I didn’t want to sound rude or come off that I was better than anyone. Those parties just aren’t for me. The party was tonight and obviously I’m not there, but how do I let people know that I’m not comfortable at those type parties, without sounding “holier than thou” :o
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Yea…I’d just say "thanks for the invitation, but that isn’t my thing. Hope you had fun. Maybe we can go for coffee sometime.’ (assuming you want a relationship w/that person…)

Just leave at that. You don’t have to be a jerk. You don’t have to ‘explain’ that it goes against your faith.

Also, I have the same question as the previous poster…what’s a passion party? I can kind of guess based on your question, but I’ve never been the type of person who’s been invited to racy parties. :o
 
Ha! When you said “passion party,” I was picturing some amateur theatrical recreating the Passion…which would be uncomfortable as well, I would imagine…
 
I think a simple, “sorry can’t make it” is fine. If she presses you (or invites you again), a simple “not interested” is enough.

If you’d like to be better friends, maybe counter with a different invite. If you are fine with the relationship, just continue to be friendly when you do see her.

I think that anyone who sells products through home parties (and people who have other types of businesses) have got to know that not everyone will be interested in what they are selling. If they are smart, they won’t unfriend people because of it.
 
aloe said:
I really dislike friends/family trying to sell things to me. I am sure I am not alone in that opinion. I ignore all invites for me to buy things from them to fund their multi level marketing adventures. I don’t give an explanation. I already spend my money giving gifts for major events and holidays.
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Tell me about it!! I’ve got the schools sending stuff home with my kids multiple times a year, wanting them to sell, sell, sell!. Multiply two or three times per year by (at one time) seven or eight kids in school in any given year, and I can’t imagine any of my friends or neighbors would still be talking to me.

Better yet when I had four boys who were all supposed to be selling the same things to everyone we knew.

I told the kids early on we simply weren’t doing it. It was hard on them at first, with all the incentive programs and the school pushing them, but they’ve accepted and I think understand why this is just not reasonable for us.
 
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