Here is my response.
Could this article be any more condescending? I am a 23 year old virgin, BY CHOICE. I have a boyfriend who respects me for that decision and honors me for saving that special gift for him when we marry. To demean the gift of virginity by comparing it to a “Christmas present” is extremely insulting to me. There is so much more tied into being a virgin than you give it credit for. You feminists really amaze me. You are all about choice and equality, but the real meat and potatoes of it is if we agree with you. If I choose to stay a virgin then that means that I’m brainwashed by religion, ugly, or awkward with the guys. Come off of it. If you really respect choice then don’t come up with these asinine columns with misleading conclusions that you have come up with. You choose to sleep around with men, demean the spiritual meaning of sex, and view penises as the best part of a man…fine. Go ahead, I can’t stop you. I may not agree with you at all, but those are the choices you made and you will have to deal with the consequences.
I am not saying that remaining a virgin does not come with it’s drawbacks. It does, but that pros out weigh the cons by a long shot. I never have to worry about getting pregnant, getting a disease, and having my heart torn out of my chest from a guy who just wanted a piece of ‘you know what.’ That’s just a short list. The bad side is people like you do not genuinely respect my decision and write me off as some kind of whacko. For my decision, I lost a lot of prospects with guys when I told them about my commitment. If they can’t accept that, then don’t let the door hit you in the butt on the way out.
Being a virgin in this society is not easy. But who said life was supposed to be easy. Some people say that people don’t stay virgins because it’s “too hard.” Going along with that train of thought, I should stop trying to get my master’s degree because that is also too hard. I should just quit my job too because I just got a whole new set of responsibilities that are just too hard. When something is hard, and you see it through, then it’s worth it. You are a stronger person because of it.
Chastity is not the same as abstinence. Chastity is refraining from ALL sexual activity including masturbation. So your charge that gay men are the most chaste people on earth is completely false. That is just one of the many ignorant parts of your article. Another part that shows how you are poorly informed is the religious aspect of sex being only for reproduction. True, many religions do embrace this as a very intregal part of sex, but many believe that sex serves as a way to unify and strenghten the bond between a husband and a wife. And what better way to have a strong bond with a person than with 2 virgins who have never known any other person. The chances of them staying together are more likely than with non-virginal marriages. Even secular sources will tell you that people who have slept around before they got married had a hard time remaining faithful.
I am sure that people will pick apart my post and tell me that I am wrong, or an idiot, or warped by old- timey, outdated values…but I am happy how I am living my life. I would not want it any other way. I have control over my body and my life. And to me there is no greater freedom on this Earth.
