Difference between admiring beauty and lusting

[the_coppersmith]

Everytime a guy passes a girl. Their either

A:thinking about her butt

Or

B:not thinking about her at all

Don’t project your thinking on the human race. Not everyone thinks in such simplistic ways.

 

[the_coppersmith]

A dudes brain is 10x more vulger than my post.

You need to back off, “dude”. Not everyone is rude and poorly educated as the ones who cannot avoid scanning the female body and attaching to its shape all sorts of vulgar expletives.

 

[Julius]

And I care about other peoples own personal butthurt why?

 

[the_coppersmith]

And I care about other peoples own personal butthurt why?

Under the assumption that you are a Catholic, thus called to follow the Christian way of life, rooted on the primacy of charity.

In certain streets, this kind of attitude will get you into trouble. In a Christian forum, however, whether digital or in-person, we try to show each other some love and respect. As such, if, say, I were to meet you and your sister in Church, I probably would not call her a “hot chick”. If the situation is reversed, my sister probably would not slap you because Christ taught us to forgive offenses, but she would probably mention that it is a distasteful and disrespectful comment.

Sure, one must be real and understand not everyone out there lives up to the standards of Christian Catholicism, and in certain places and cultures there are words and expressions that are considered acceptable while being rejected in other places or by other cultures.

So we need to get the context before we try to teach others the lessons we’ve learned. Bottom point: we both agree on the basics that lusting after someone is not ok, while acknowledging beauty is ok.

My comments probably came across the wrong way because we’re only names and words on a forum. I meant no offense. I’m sure that in a personal conversation we would find an easy agreement. We just expressed similar concepts in different ways. That’s humanity.

I still think generalizing can be a slippery slope. There are more people out there who practice restraint of the sexual passions than we think, despite the fact that our culture (especially in first-world countries) has become hyper-sexualized.

 

[TheLegend]

I always assumed it was intentions

There is a difference between the man who goes to the beach and sees women in bikinis vs the man who goes to the beach to see women in bikinis.

That is not “admiring beauty”. It is very offensive and many find both the adjective “hot” and the term “chick” to be vulgar.

It is offensive because the word hot general applies to the persons figure only. Who wants to be referred to as a chicken? Therefore it objectifies and reduces the humanity of a woman.

 

[joeybaggz]

Are they the same thing? Or is the difference is looking onto a women to lust? From my opinion admiring beauty is simply looking at a women (or in a women’s case a man) in the face and not letting your eyes wonder and give you a kind of sick mental pleasure of it all. Any ideas or such is fine…

Might want to look at it this way. To admire what God has created as good, cannot be evil, unless there is an evil intent behind your admiration. When normal healthy recognition and appreciation of the beauty seen in another occurs, it becomes sinful when recognition and/or admiration is infused with both malice and intent.
To see a human being in the suit in which they were born cannot, in and of itself, be sinful. If it is, stay out of the Sistine Chapel.
My two cents

 

[Kei]

Sirach Chapter 9
1 Be not jealous over the wife of thy bosom, and teach her not an evil lesson against thyself.
2 Give not thy soul unto a woman to set her foot upon thy substance.
3 Meet not with an harlot, lest thou fall into her snares.
4 Use not much the company of a woman that is a singer, lest thou be taken with her attempts.
5 Gaze not on a maid, that thou fall not by those things that are precious in her.
6 Give not thy soul unto harlots, that thou lose not thine inheritance.
7 Look not round about thee in the streets of the city, neither wander thou in the solitary place thereof.
8 Turn away thine eye from a beautiful woman, and look not upon another’s beauty; for many have been deceived by the beauty of a woman; for herewith love is kindled as a fire.
9 Sit not at all with another man’s wife, nor sit down with her in thine arms, and spend not thy money with her at the wine; lest thine heart incline unto her, and so through thy desire thou fall into destruction.
10 Forsake not an old friend; for the new is not comparable to him: a new friend is as new wine; when it is old, thou shalt drink it with pleasure.
11 Envy not the glory of a sinner: for thou knowest not what shall be his end.
12 Delight not in the thing that the ungodly have pleasure in; but remember they shall not go unpunished unto their grave.
13 Keep thee far from the man that hath power to kill; so shalt thou not doubt the fear of death: and if thou come unto him, make no fault, lest he take away thy life presently: remember that thou goest in the midst of snares, and that thou walkest upon the battlements of the city.
14 As near as thou canst, guess at thy neighbour, and consult with the wise.
15 Let thy talk be with the wise, and all thy communication in the law of the most High.
16 And let just men eat and drink with thee; and let thy glorying be in the fear of the Lord.
17 For the hand of the artificer the work shall be commended: and the wise ruler of the people for his speech.
18 A man of an ill tongue is dangerous in his city; and he that is rash in his talk shall be hated.

 

[Catholicwife32]

Lust is the impulse to pursue sexual pleasure for it’s own sake. It is the moment you look at a woman to objectify her. It is not merely finding her beautiful or EVEN feeling a sexual response in yourself to her beauty. It is gawking at her. It generally will make her feel uncomfortable and even sexually violated, unless she’s getting off on you staring. Indeed, being stared while knowing someone is taking sexual pleasure out of it can feel like a type of sexual assault for a woman. But if there’s some level of consent, then the sin can be mutual, both in the man engaging in the gawking, and the woman taking pleasure out of being gawked at.

If she is behaving in a manner to draw men’s sexual attention to her, than that is her behaving immodestly. But the point of her immodesty is like the point a man gazes at her lustfully. It’s about her sexual pleasure. Afterall, women generally enjoy and are turned on by being looked. We are more vain and less visual. Men, generally, are the opposite. You may be able to relate somewhat to the desire to be desired by a woman, but chances are, you enjoy staring at her more than you enjoy being stared at. But it’s not universal. Some men do have a stronger desire to be stared at then most men. And some women are more visual than other women.

 

[JamalChristophr]

Where did this chicken business come into play anyways? I don’t really see the correlation.

 

[jzea1992]

Maybe this is why more women should wear skirts or dresses so as to not allow men as yourself the ability to see their shape.

 

[the_coppersmith]

Maybe this is why more women should wear skirts or dresses so as to not allow men as yourself the ability to see their shape.

Excuse you? “Men as myself”? It is this mindset of aggressiveness and “imposing the Catholic burqa” on women that creates such abrasiveness when people bring up topics like modesty or wearing the veil at mass. Read the Didache.

My child, be not lustful, for lust leads to fornication, nor a speaker of base words, nor a lifter up of the eyes, for from all these is adultery engendered.

Custody of the eyes is the way to go. To ponder between the difference between “admiring” and “lusting” is to be on a slippery slope.