Discerning to the Priesthood

[Ianjo99]

Although I am not particulary new to the boards, I really don’t post very often so many of you may not know me.

Anyways, I have been thinking about the priesthood since my senior year in high school (I am now in my sophomore year in college). Mostly, it was a certain peacefulness that I felt whenever I thought about that vocation, and a feeling of indescribable “rightness” (in terms of what I felt I should direct my life towards) whenever I discussed religion with people. I went with my previous decision to go pre-med and have been studying Biology and English ever since.

My questions mostly revolve around what would happen if I did decide to try to become a seminarian. For one, I would have to leave my closest friends behind. That alone scares me into waiting until after college to reconsider the vocation.

Secondly, I sometimes wonder if my actions now reflect who I truly am. I do a lot of things I’m not proud of now, and it doesn’t seem like that will change much. Along with this, I wonder what would happen if I went into the seminary and then decided I wasn’t called. Where would I go and what would I do with the training I had recieved? I would have lost all my former friends for nothing…

Most of all, I keep thinking of what my life would be like if I ever did become a priest. My interpersonal relationships would be limited, and I would never see a child of my own. I can see myself with a family, holding my children and watching them grow. Also, I fear that I would be forever lonely and eventually feel that I had wasted my life.

Aside from all of these obstacles, something feels inherently “right” about training for the priesthood.

Any tips or comments on my discernment? I know I haven’t given you much information, but it’s still something thats been bothering me lately.

 

[Ron21]

I know how you feel man and i can relate very well. My best advise for you is to pray and ask for guidance. Pray the rosary especially and think of how it was easy for Mary to say Yes. This will inspire you. Remember, your old friends will always be there but you just have to realise that there are many things more important than friends and that is to serve God. And who knows maybe your call to holiness may inspire your friends to live Godly lives. With regards to you wanting to have children, maybe you could become a Deacon but you wont be able to celebrate the Eucarist…

I hope this helps and i hope you make the right decision
God Bless You:thumbsup

 

[vince2paul]

do you have a spiritual director? If you don’t, you may want to find one. A spiritual director will be helpful in your discernment. If you decide to enter seminary, doesn’t mean that you have to leave you closest friends, you still can contact them and there’ll be new friends. When you become a priest, the whole church is your children, family & friends.

Well, I guess no one knows what God’s will for us. The best for us to do is pray, pray and pray. Ask for His blessing in everything that we want to do.

I like what Cardinal Newman said;
*God has created me to do Him some definite service; He has committed some work to me which He has not committed to another. I have my mission - I may never know it in this life, but I shall be told it in the next. *-Cardinal Newman-

 

[chris_molter]

Although I am not particulary new to the boards, I really don’t post very often so many of you may not know me.

Anyways, I have been thinking about the priesthood since my senior year in high school (I am now in my sophomore year in college). Mostly, it was a certain peacefulness that I felt whenever I thought about that vocation, and a feeling of indescribable “rightness” (in terms of what I felt I should direct my life towards) whenever I discussed religion with people. I went with my previous decision to go pre-med and have been studying Biology and English ever since.

I empathize with you. I was still an Episcopalian in college and was in the discernment process to become a priest in that denomination. Of course, there wasn’t a conflict between ordination and marriage/children at that point!

You may want to consider the various options for laity if you truly feel called to marriage and family life. There are many great lay theologians, apologists, writers, and teachers/professors who live saintly lives and help bring others to Christ through their professions.

My questions mostly revolve around what would happen if I did decide to try to become a seminarian. For one, I would have to leave my closest friends behind. That alone scares me into waiting until after college to reconsider the vocation.

You may want to wait until after graduation to take that step. It’s tough leaving good friends, but remember, you don’t leave them forever! Good solid friendships are vital to a seminarian and Priest! It helps keep life from becoming TOO insular and detached from the “outside world”. Personally, I think that’s important for secular clergy since that’s their “workspace”!

Secondly, I sometimes wonder if my actions now reflect who I truly am. I do a lot of things I’m not proud of now, and it doesn’t seem like that will change much. Along with this, I wonder what would happen if I went into the seminary and then decided I wasn’t called. Where would I go and what would I do with the training I had recieved? I would have lost all my former friends for nothing…

Remember, seminary is a place for continued discernment. A good number of seminarians finally discern a calling that is not to the Priesthood. Most ex-seminarians I’ve heard discuss it say they wouldn’t trade their experiences there for anything. Also, don’t get too discouraged by your own weaknesses or sins. Many of the greatest Saints in history were notorious sinners (Augustine is one I particularly identify with!!). I’ve heard it said that God doesn’t call the qualified, he qualifies the called.

Most of all, I keep thinking of what my life would be like if I ever did become a priest. My interpersonal relationships would be limited, and I would never see a child of my own. I can see myself with a family, holding my children and watching them grow. Also, I fear that I would be forever lonely and eventually feel that I had wasted my life.

For this, I’d echo vince2paul’s suggestion that you develop a relationship with a spiritual director who is a Priest. Speak honestly and openly about your fears and worries. Ask him about the lifestyle of a Priest (just make sure the man you approach is a solid Priest and not one of the lavender mafia types!! ). You may not be called to the Priesthood, but God is calling you to something. You can feel him tugging at your heart, obviously. He calls us each by name, all we have to do is listen and be patient!

Aside from all of these obstacles, something feels inherently “right” about training for the priesthood.

Any tips or comments on my discernment? I know I haven’t given you much information, but it’s still something thats been bothering me lately.

Most dioceses have discernment retreats and weekends at their seminaries for men like you to find out more about seminary life and the Priesthood. I’d avail myself of those resources if I were you. Your diocesan vocations director could also be of assistance. I’d also recommend www.vocation.com and other online resources. Another thing to think about is the life of a religious Priest. Research some of the religious orders in the Church, find out if your calling matches theirs! If any of them pique your curiosity, they’ll have folks for you to contact with questions regarding possible vocations.

Above all, try to live the life of a good Catholic layperson. Try making it to Confession more often or setting aside more time for serious prayer and reading of Scriptures. These things will be IMMEASURABLY helpful in your discernment.

I’ll keep ya in my prayers, brother.

 

[chicago]

I’d go with your instincts in what you say “feels right”. I also wouldn’t worry so much about all your worries. Friends will come and go. Good friendsships will last beyond changes in life. It’s only natural to want to have a family. I’d be a little concerned about you if you didn’t have that desire. But with time and discernment, you’ll learn whether the larger spiritual family of priestly fatherhood is something which you desire more or if marriage is, instead, your call. Remember, entering seminary isn’t a final decision about all of this. It’s only a mere beginning.

 

[CatholicMC]

I’m a senior in college, and thinking seriously about entering a seminary or religous order.

I believe most seminaries require that you have some sort of undergraduate degree upon entry. Waiting until you graduate might not be a bad idea.

If you decide to leave seminary you still would have two degrees to fall back upon.

What are the things you do that you aren’t proud of? Do you do them with your friends? I’m not saying to go out and ditch them, but does their presence bring you closer to your relationship with God, or hinder it?

If they are true friends, then I think you will always remain in contact with them. Plus, think of all of the new frienships that will be formed in seminary!

Regarding a family, I often have the same questions. I can’t think of anything more awesome than bringing life into the world. But I think a priestly life could also be equally fulfilling.

Peace out brother.