A
Alainval
Guest
I’m currently 18 years old and have recently been brought back to communion with the Church. I’ve seemed to always desired to be a minister even when I was a Protestant, and seemed to always felt this desire to become a priest. After many months of turning 18 I started to speak with several priests on my discernment. But there was this one priest I was talking to made it seem like I wasn’t good enough. He said I wasn’t ready, which I understand. But that’s not the problem I felt. The problem I felt was that I just felt so discouraged after talking to him. He said I wasn’t a practicing Catholic because I haven’t gone to Mass in months due to the COVID crisis, and also explained to him how the obligation wasn’t necessary until September 1. I also explained to him how I struggled greatly with social anxiety and scruples which played into me going to Mass during those times. I understand that. But the way he told me about it made me feel horrible. I also explained to him how I try to help people who struggle with scruples and temptations to despair and he said I was like the blind man leading the blind. Because of all of this and several other reasons I left the conversation really sad. It was almost as if it was traumatic remembering the encounter. At that point I just wanted to go home and sleep so I wouldn’t think about it. But it just kept on bothering me and making me more discouraged. I started feeling as if God didn’t love me or want me. Trying to sleep that night was hard. Anyways this all happened yesterday and he wanted to see me again. I was asking for your guys’ advice on whether I should go back and continue meeting him even though I feel like I will just get more discouraged. But it should never be about me. Anyways, any help?