Divorce a part of God's plan?

[lilder]

Is divorce ever a part of God’s plan for someone’s life?

It is said that all things work for the good for those that trust in the Lord. But there seems to be a high number of people, even good Catholics, that are getting divorces. Does this mean that is what God planned for them?

Is divorce ever considered a “good” thing? Obviously, leaving an abusive relationship is the right choice. But what if there isn’t abuse, but just a lot of mistakes? Perhaps the couple was too young, there has been infidelity or unforeseen changes.

Sometimes people learn a lot from being in a “bad” place and leaning on God and working through it…but it seems a lot of the ends are divorce. So would this make the divorce a part of the Lord’s plan for that person?

Lilder

 

[Brendan]

No divorce is NOT part of God’s Plan. God never planned for a persons to enter into abusive relationships, but for the greater good, allows Free Will. Thus in many cases grants the Grace of Sacrament to the couple with a desire for them to freely accept it.

A divorce is a sign that the Grace was rejected (if Sacramental Marriage) or not present (in the case of secular or invalid Marriage)

 

[jrabs]

No, I do not think Divorce is part of God’s plan. I think it is really a matter of us overridding God’s will for us in our lives.

For example: 20 years ago, God introduced me to a wonderful man, nice and caring - but lived a few hours away. Then along came a different man who turned my head AND lived in town. God gave me the free will to choose, but I aparantly did not follow God’s will because I selected the local man.

Now my choice ended up with porn addictions, turned away from God and did not work for 10 years. We got a divorce and God blessed me with an annullment ( just before my ex literally disappeared).

See, that’s where God worked this out for my good.
And the twist to this all? The nice man from 20 years ago that I should have picked? Well, he still lives a few hours away and we lost touch 20 years ago. Then one day 2 years ago, I randomly picked up the newspaper from that city and was reading it. Well who do you think was in the paper for winning an award? Yep - it was him! I wrote to him and we started dating immediately.

He had told me he had been in love with me for all these 20 years and had never married because of me but had heard through the grapevine that I had married.

So - God does work all out for the good to those that are faithful. However, the price we pay for not following His will can be a long, hard , agonizing road.

Wow, if I had only listened! I am more keene to listen now.

 

[ShenQiBaoBei]

Just because something is a sin does not mean it cannot be a part of God’s plan. God has the world in His hands, and anything He allows to happen is supposed to happen. He can also prevent things from happening that are not according to His will. Sometimes, things are according to His will, but are against His commands. But one must remember that God uses bad to bring good out of it; all things work together for those who love God (Romans 8:28). A great example of this can be seen in Jesus’ family tree. Pastor Mark Driscoll says “The human ancestry of Jesus includes adultery, murder, incest, and prostitution.” (marshill.com/2012/12/04/knots-in-jesus-family-tree) However, God chose for these people to lead up to the birth of Jesus. Without them, how would He have been born? See, God turns bad into good!

Matthew 5:32 says that infidelity of a spouse is the one justifiable reason for divorce. Divorces have happened over this, and they were not just a part of God’s will, but were also not a sin. But even divorces that are not justifiable are still part of God’s will; it doesn’t mean that He thought it wasn’t a sin, though. It also doesn’t mean you should do it. Just because you are forgiven doesn’t mean you have a free pass/ticket to sin as you please.

Here’s another reason that might help open your mind to this train of thought; children are born from marriages that happened after divorces; say, someone divorces, then they remarry and have children. God has planned for everyone to live- no one is a mistake. Divorce and remarriage allowed those people to be created, just as the murderers, prostitutes, and cheaters in Jesus’ family allowed him to be born.

I hope this helps!

 

[ShenQiBaoBei]

No, I do not think Divorce is part of God’s plan. I think it is really a matter of us overridding God’s will for us in our lives.

For example: 20 years ago, God introduced me to a wonderful man, nice and caring - but lived a few hours away. Then along came a different man who turned my head AND lived in town. God gave me the free will to choose, but I aparantly did not follow God’s will because I selected the local man.

Now my choice ended up with porn addictions, turned away from God and did not work for 10 years. We got a divorce and God blessed me with an annullment ( just before my ex literally disappeared).

See, that’s where God worked this out for my good.
And the twist to this all? The nice man from 20 years ago that I should have picked? Well, he still lives a few hours away and we lost touch 20 years ago. Then one day 2 years ago, I randomly picked up the newspaper from that city and was reading it. Well who do you think was in the paper for winning an award? Yep - it was him! I wrote to him and we started dating immediately.

He had told me he had been in love with me for all these 20 years and had never married because of me but had heard through the grapevine that I had married.

So - God does work all out for the good to those that are faithful. However, the price we pay for not following His will can be a long, hard , agonizing road.

Wow, if I had only listened! I am more keene to listen now.

I agree when you say that it would’ve been easier if you’d followed His will at first. God works for the good of those who love Him. Think of it this way; I believe God let it happen so that you would realize how lucky you are to have the man you do now. Because if you’d just gotten the good guy, and not dated that bad guy and married him, and seen how bad relationships can get, then you wouldn’t have had any bad to compare the good to. Just like some people believe God allowed evil into the world by our choice so that we could see how good He is; the only way we’d be able to truly appreciate His goodness is by seeing what bad is.

 

[TheWarriorMonk]

Is divorce ever a part of God’s plan for someone’s life?

I believe yes. There are plenty of examples throughout the Bible where people are put through trials.

I’ll even cite myself as such an example. I was a non-practicing Catholic that married a non-Catholic the first time around. Had I still been married to this person I can assure you that I would still be a non-practicing Catholic, and one with no children. However, I am now a practicing Catholic married to another practicing Catholic, with several adopted children (from a secular, communist country) also being raised Catholic. I believe that my divorce was a necessity to bring me back to the faith, and God was part of that plan.

 

[JackieMom]

Just because something is a sin does not mean it cannot be a part of God’s plan. God has the world in His hands, and anything He allows to happen is supposed to happen. He can also prevent things from happening that are not according to His will. Sometimes, things are according to His will, but are against His commands. But one must remember that God uses bad to bring good out of it; all things work together for those who love God (Romans 8:28). A great example of this can be seen in Jesus’ family tree. Pastor Mark Driscoll says “The human ancestry of Jesus includes adultery, murder, incest, and prostitution.” (marshill.com/2012/12/04/knots-in-jesus-family-tree) However, God chose for these people to lead up to the birth of Jesus. Without them, how would He have been born? See, God turns bad into good!

Matthew 5:32 says that infidelity of a spouse is the one justifiable reason for divorce. Divorces have happened over this, and they were not just a part of God’s will, but were also not a sin. But even divorces that are not justifiable are still part of God’s will; it doesn’t mean that He thought it wasn’t a sin, though. It also doesn’t mean you should do it. Just because you are forgiven doesn’t mean you have a free pass/ticket to sin as you please.

Here’s another reason that might help open your mind to this train of thought; children are born from marriages that happened after divorces; say, someone divorces, then they remarry and have children. God has planned for everyone to live- no one is a mistake. Divorce and remarriage allowed those people to be created, just as the murderers, prostitutes, and cheaters in Jesus’ family allowed him to be born.

I hope this helps!

Um, no. That is a Protestant perspective, not a Catholic one. Annulments are not granted because of infidelity, and divorced Catholics are not free to remarry and have more children within the context of invalid “marriages.” If humans override God’s laws and children are born, the children are a blessing but the acts that created them are still sins.

And Jesus was born of the Immaculate Conception. I have no idea what you mean by his lineage being littered with whores and murderers.

 

[His_helpmeet]

Although divorce itself is not a part of God’s plan, there is no reason that it cannot be used to bring about far greater things.

For example, Judas chose to betray Jesus. Was his action morally right? No. But God chose to use that action to bring about salvation. This does not justify Judas’s action becuase he had free will. The end does not justify the means. However, God can use bad situations to bring about great good.

My stepdaughter’s mother walked out on my husband almost 5 years ago, after they had been married for 4 years and had a 3-year-old daughter. The marriage was declared invalid by the Church, and my husband and I have been married for 2 years, sacramentally married for 7 months. My stepdaughter is now 8 years old and is a beautiful, well-behaved child. She calls me “Mommy” and I feel that I am very blessed to have her in my life. I consider myself to have spiritually adopted her, intending no disrespect towards her biological mother, but I consider her my own child.

My husband came from England to marry his daughter’s mother. (We live in Canada.) After she left him, he was strongly tempted to return to England, but God kept telling him to stay where he was. As it turned out, a month before his ex left him, I moved to a city an hour away to attend graduate school. We met online just over a year after she left, and in person 4 months later. We realized that we are pretty much the male and female versions of each other (with just enough differences to make things exciting!) and we believed that God had created us with the intention that we should marry each other, if we chose to submit to His Will.

In summary, God was able to use a bad situation, my husband’s divorce, to bring about two very positive outcomes: our marriage and our daughter. He has been so incredibly good to us, and there is very little more I could ask for.