Divorce and Remarriage Advice

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CatholicSpirit

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So, there are lots of people who go through unexpected things around us. Having not been through it, sometimes we have to ask the experts. What are examples of your best advice for others? Here’s one I picked up today:

Single dad talks to his daughter, who’s mother is remarried. The ex-wife likes to paint a horrible picture of the relationship to the child. So, the single dad says, “the day you grew in your mothers womb, it was just us, knowing we wanted you in our lives, we mutually agreed while alone that you would make us happy.”

Instead of trying to justify his ex-wife is obnoxious for leaving, he tells the truth of how much his child was loved since day zero. The only responses left for the ex-wife are:

A. He is lying
B. He is telling the truth

Lying means they are going to tell the child in a way they were a mistake. Truth means she loved the child’s father once. Now, the one who left has to answer the difficult questions instead and every time their stories of how bad the child’s father is, in the back of their mind is, “but she loved him” and “I don’t want to look like this someday to my own child.”
 
Prior to conception, both were loved but one was flesh. Love was for both of them, and to cease to love ones father in defense of them is not a defense.
 
Post deleted due to misreading of a comment.
 
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CatholicSpirit said:
Prior to conception, both were loved but one was flesh. Love was for both of them, and to cease to love ones father in defense of them is not a defense.
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I do not understand, since in the first post is given that they produced a child that was mutually loved, but not that they mutually loved one another (man and wife).
 
You are reading it wrong. Do you have any advice for divorced couples?
 
It seems you would rather be part of the problem than the solution for divorced persons on here. I’ll pray for your friends and those you won’t assist. Your criticism of my attempt is unwelcome.
 
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CatholicSpirit said:
The only responses left for the ex-wife are:

A. He is lying

B. He is telling the truth
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There are a trillion other responses.

The bottom line is it is very bad form to talk badly about their parent to a child, even if you are their other parent. The old adage of “if you cannot say anything good, say nothing.” holds true.

“Your father and I both love you very much. We do not live together, but, that does not mean we do not both love you. Want to go for a walk now?”
 
Love one another as Christ has loved you.

Love your enemies, do good to them who spitefully treat you.

Love.
 
This thread is funny. My suggestion is a patch for a hole in the family. Suggesting that if two persons who are divorced cannot get along, they can or should at least agree on the fact that their child was wanted and that they were in love at one time. Encouraging the prevention of saying something rude and unappealing with the replacement of allowing the other to be rude when saying something nice is good and solid advice. I stand by that advice.
 
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CatholicSpirit said:
It seems you would rather be part of the problem than the solution for divorced persons on here. I’ll pray for your friends and those you won’t assist. Your criticism of my attempt is unwelcome.
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Is this meant for me? I really didn’t know what you were asking and asked you to clarify. 😳
 
Not at all IM2, never for you. I’m speaking to others who have blatantly avoided the topic. The goal is to write encouraging information for Catholics who struggle with verbal relations in divorce situations and what works best. It can come from anywhere, so long as it’s effective.
 
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