Do Catholics believe that men are the head of the household

[alice24]

Again, I see that you are quoting from Trent on this. So again I ask, how does this work out for you and your wife in your daily life? I’d really love to read your answer on this, because you seem to have such a vested interest in responding on every thread that discusses “male headship and wifely submission”. Perhaps it’s because the thread gets closed down before you can respond, but I know I’ve inquired this of you before and have yet to hear some examples from you on the day to day living it out. Please share how this works in your own marriage. It’s easy to quote chapter and verse on things, but people who wonder about Catholic teachings on this topic benefit the most by hearing how it really plays out.

Or perhaps you are single with no experience in this area…would you share how you expect this to be in the real life situations that come up in every marriage, once you do have a wife?

This!!! At least, the strongest submission supporters here tend to never explain their kind of living.

 

[His_helpmeet]

I submit to my husband by showing him respect. But we make most decisions together and he respects that I have greater knowledge about some things. I look at it as he’s ultimately responsible for the spiritual well-being of the family. If he screws up, he has to answer to HIS Boss (Christ), which means it is a poor husband who would not take seriously the concerns of his wife and have the best interests of his family at heart.

 

[QwertyGirl]

I look at it as he’s ultimately responsible for the spiritual well-being of the family

I have always wondered about this belief. Don’t you feel like it is a cop-out for the mother and the kids, themselves, to say he is responsible for the spiritual well-being? Doesn’t that diminish the personal accountability both of the mother for looking out for her kids with respect to their spiritual development, as well as the accountability of the kids for taking an active role in their spiritual development? Obviously, I dont’ agree with your viewpoint, but I am not trying to be argumentative here. I just like to learn how others think. This has always fascinated me.

 

[Xantippe]

I suspect that being head of the household is like being a lady–if you have to talk about it, you’re not.

 

[Xantippe]

Yes, that’s right.

 

[Jules]

Hi Rozelleliliy,

I’m also from Australia and so understand our cultural context.

I like BoyGenius’s reply. A marraige is a relationship of love and is meant to be under the rule of the God of Love, so issues regarding domination should not really apply if everyone does the Will of God.

I had a situation where the story of St Joseph really impact my life. I had some really terrible neighbours who disliked us intensely, and continued to escalate their animosity to try and get a reaction, to the point where they did something illegal. Now, I can tell you that in that situation my wife, who is very independent, looked to me for leadership (well she thought I should stand up to them and maybe even be prepared to fight) but after trying peaceful means to get them off our back I decided that we had to leave for our own safety (as St Joseph did) giving up the house we built with no certainty of where we would end up. She was not happy about the situation and took it out on me a lot but I have never for one second doubted that it was the right decision and my wife now looks back in complete agreement.

In our relatively safe lives in the West we don’t often get into a life or death situation but my experience is those characteristics present themselves in important junctures. What happens on a daily basis between husband and wife is not as important but I can also tell you that my wife really wanted a professional career and I did everything to clear the way for her and now she sees how it really is. It isn’t empowering. Work you do for free, work you do for love is empowering. When you work for money you have to compromise daily. There are an infinite number of ways to do good and there are no rules about that.