Do you believe God loves you?

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EIF5A

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The most difficult part hasn’t been giving up a major sinful lifestyle I was attached to (although there are others I have to work on).

I find it more difficult to believe God loves me. In my mind, I’m just a random anonymous person in a crowd that God is not conscious of. Even if I were to somehow make it to heaven, I want to be unseen by God. (The only other option is hell, and I definitely don’t want that.) I think if I can see others being happy with the Beatific Vision, then I will be content. The burden of having useless thoughts like these is not a fun experience.

Given all my imperfections and the consequences of the evil sins of my past, I just can’t conceive that God loves me. But I’m supposed to believe that as a Christian, right?

Reading about the heroic saints, part of me is inspired by their life…and part of me says, “I will never be like them. God does not love me because I am not like them — instead I am filled with all sorts of vices and evil inclinations.”

I have a suspicion that something’s not right here, but not sure what it is…

Do I lack faith and hope in God’s mercy? Have I fallen into the sin of despair and blasphemy against the Holy Spirit?
 
God loves you because he gave up His only son to die on the Cross for you, wash clean the stain of sin, open up the gates of Heaven for you and offer you the opportunity for eternal life. The fact that you can now get to Heaven is evidence of God’s love for you. God has given us this opportunity, it is now down to our own free will whether we avail ourselves of this opportunity. Christ suffered and died on the Cross as a man to atone for our sins and open Heaven for us. What other proof of God’s love for you do you need?

God doesn’t love us because we deserve to be loved, God loves us despite our unworthiness. His love is unconditional. So regardless of your sins of the present or of the past God loves you. God loves us therefore He does not make slaves of us, we are still left with free will. He has opened the door to Heaven for us and it is up to us to choose whether we walk through it or not.
 
EIF5A said:
Given all my imperfections and the consequences of the evil sins of my past, I just can’t conceive that God loves me. But I’m supposed to believe that as a Christian, right?
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As a priest once said, what makes your sins so special, that Christ did not die for them?
 
I believe it is ok to have some doubts as long as you are seeking the Truth. As long as we are willing to believe God loves us, it is all right. Feelings are unreliable and come and go.
We love are children even though they are not perfect.
 
EIF5A said:
The most difficult part hasn’t been giving up a major sinful lifestyle I was attached to (although there are others I have to work on).

I find it more difficult to believe God loves me. In my mind, I’m just a random anonymous person in a crowd that God is not conscious of. Even if I were to somehow make it to heaven, I want to be unseen by God. (The only other option is hell, and I definitely don’t want that.) I think if I can see others being happy with the Beatific Vision, then I will be content. The burden of having useless thoughts like these is not a fun experience.

Given all my imperfections and the consequences of the evil sins of my past, I just can’t conceive that God loves me. But I’m supposed to believe that as a Christian, right?

Reading about the heroic saints, part of me is inspired by their life…and part of me says, “I will never be like them. God does not love me because I am not like them — instead I am filled with all sorts of vices and evil inclinations.”

I have a suspicion that something’s not right here, but not sure what it is…

Do I lack faith and hope in God’s mercy? Have I fallen into the sin of despair and blasphemy against the Holy Spirit?
Click to expand...
Hopefully, we are all struggling to be more like our Lord Jesus Christ as we follow Him and grow in His Grace.

The Lord loves every individual that comes into the world; all we have to do is receive His Love and allow it to flow back to Him and to others. Prayer and the Sacraments aids us.

He loves you! He created you! He loves you with an infinite love. 🙂

In Jesus and Mary,

Dorothy
 
I believe that God loves me and everyone else in the world.
 
EIF5A said:
The most difficult part hasn’t been giving up a major sinful lifestyle I was attached to (although there are others I have to work on).

I find it more difficult to believe God loves me. In my mind, I’m just a random anonymous person in a crowd that God is not conscious of. Even if I were to somehow make it to heaven, I want to be unseen by God. (The only other option is hell, and I definitely don’t want that.) I think if I can see others being happy with the Beatific Vision, then I will be content. The burden of having useless thoughts like these is not a fun experience.

Given all my imperfections and the consequences of the evil sins of my past, I just can’t conceive that God loves me. But I’m supposed to believe that as a Christian, right?

Reading about the heroic saints, part of me is inspired by their life…and part of me says, “I will never be like them. God does not love me because I am not like them — instead I am filled with all sorts of vices and evil inclinations.”

I have a suspicion that something’s not right here, but not sure what it is…

Do I lack faith and hope in God’s mercy? Have I fallen into the sin of despair and blasphemy against the Holy Spirit?
Click to expand...
From what I understand, the saints also had their trials and tribulations as well as their imperfections. They were not born holy or heroic, and even when deemed saints by the Church, that does not mean they have achieved perfection. No one is perfect except G-d. So try not to beat yourself up for being weak and a sinner: we all are. Every one of us is on a journey of faith, seeking to be a better person than who we presently are. The good part is that we have an all-merciful G-d to help us on our journey and the tools (Sacraments, Torah, and so on) to guide us along the right path. And G-d has bestowed upon us the ability to choose to do good despite our many imperfections. This is evidence of G-d’s love for us.
 
EIF5A said:
The most difficult part hasn’t been giving up a major sinful lifestyle I was attached to (although there are others I have to work on).

I find it more difficult to believe God loves me. In my mind, I’m just a random anonymous person in a crowd that God is not conscious of. Even if I were to somehow make it to heaven, I want to be unseen by God. (The only other option is hell, and I definitely don’t want that.) I think if I can see others being happy with the Beatific Vision, then I will be content. The burden of having useless thoughts like these is not a fun experience.

Given all my imperfections and the consequences of the evil sins of my past, I just can’t conceive that God loves me. But I’m supposed to believe that as a Christian, right?

Reading about the heroic saints, part of me is inspired by their life…and part of me says, “I will never be like them. God does not love me because I am not like them — instead I am filled with all sorts of vices and evil inclinations.”

I have a suspicion that something’s not right here, but not sure what it is…

Do I lack faith and hope in God’s mercy? Have I fallen into the sin of despair and blasphemy against the Holy Spirit?
Click to expand...
Your situation sounds eerily familiar to my own. As I was driving home from my parents house today I was listening to an audiobook recording of St. John of the Cross’ Dark Night of the Soul. It’s interesting because the spiritual aridity that characterizes what he calls the dark night of the soul exhibits a lot of the symptoms that you are describing and he explains how this is actually a natural phase of the one who is legitimately on the path to seeking God. I believe the physical analogy he used was one of an infant who is accustomed to being caressed by her mother and then must be made to walk and exist independent of the mother as the child ages, all for the benefit of the child to be able to do more edifying things after acquiring these new abilities. Anyway, he does an excellent job of describing this process and the path forward much better than I could hope to do, and I think you could benefit tremendously by picking up a copy for yourself. If nothing else it is reassuring to know that other people, even saintly people, have walked this path before, as meltzerboy indicated. A blessed Easter to you! 🙂
 
The experiences of uncoditional love by God, led me to my first confession after years, it led me out of a really really bad situations. Then it gradually ceased and now that !FEELING! comes very rarely. It corresponds exactly with the growth in my spiritual life. I still find myself in dificult spots, often because of depression, and eventhough I don’t have the feeling to cling to, His Grace is still bestowed on to me. Otherwise I’d fall terribly. It’s extremely easy to love God when the feeling of His Love, egnites your love. But is that the true love ?
Who loves God? He who lives according to his Will and commands. If you are keeping the commands, you love God and his Grace is with you. Otherwise you’d not be able to keep the commandements.

God loves everyone, not everyone loves God. He gives us his love, so that we have something to give back to him. He is the source of all the virtues and He is glorified when you live a life of virtue. Nothing is from us, all is from God.
 
God knows my frailties, weaknesses and propensity to sin and He also knows and sees all that is wonderful and beautiful that he created within me (even if I cannot see it). Whenever I run to him, it is the same as a very small child who, no matter their state or disobedience, confidently runs to their parent who loves them. I know God loves me, He may not like what I do or say at times and at other times He has to discipline me. But when He does discipline, it is always gentle and loving.

You said that there is a part of you that says that you will never be like one of the saints you read about. That voice has spoken to me (and many others) saying exactly the same thing and has ground many down into feeling utterly worthless. It seems to me that, it is not part of you, but satan up to his usual mischief encouraging you to build a wall between you and God. I recently read that the more we yearn to be close to God, there will be more attacks. Saint Albert the Great wrote (On Cleaving to God) about not taking ownership of thoughts that take us away from God, but to flick them away (like a fly landing on a tonsure). Saint Albert was writing to monks who had blasphemous (and other) thoughts whilst praying and wrote that if you wanted to cleave to God and got these thoughts, they had to come from the creature that wants to separate you from God by tricking you into accepting its whispering as your failing.

It seems to me that you are in the middle of a spiritual battle which is always horrible. The enemy always plays dirty and gets us questioning in such a way that it drags us down. Keep praying to God and spend some quiet time simply reading the Bible or advice from others who have suffered as you are suffering. If possible, could you find a Spiritual Director or a priest you could confide in. It won’t be a quick fix, but God-willing they could be God’s instruments in helping you through this.

As time passes, I wish that there could be more information at parish levels about spiritual battles and warfare. I will stop typing and start praying for you.
 
Yes

I remember reading in St. Faustina’s diary that Jesus recommended that people dwell on His Passion as if He undertook it for them alone. He would rather face death and torture to save us. If His wounds and death will not convince you, what will?

I hope people here are praying the Divine Mercy novena. Divine Mercy is next Sunday.
 
Yes, I know God loves me.

I have been in your position. It is pride, manifesting as a lack of trust. You believe in God and the idea behind the parable of the prodigal son, but you don’t believe that you are that son/daughter because, for whatever reason…insert the blank…,you are different. Unforgivable.

The truth is you are not special or unique. You were made in His image and likeness (like all of us), you are a sinner (like all of us), and He loves you (like all of us). There is nothing you can do about that. Lose the pride in your so-called unique past, sins, or defects, and decide to trust. Trust that He meant what He said. He made you, and I mean this in all charity, who do you think you are to tell Him He doesn’t love you?
 
Yes. Unconditionally. Do I disappoint Him? Every moment. The real question you should ask yourself is do you love God? Unconditionally? Through the good and the bad times. Know He is there.
 
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