F
Feel
Guest
Do you know friend’s who get depressed?
How do you deal with that issue?
How do you deal with that issue?
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C
Convert3
Guest
Pray for them. Be understanding.
T
TheLittleLady
Guest
Love them. Be kind.
I
Irishmom2
Guest
Pray for them. Let them know you are willing to listen. Try to include them in something that may take their mind off their depression if even for a little bit.
A
ASC
Guest
Yeah, I have a friend like that. I listen to her. I give advice if she asks for it. Mostly I just listen. I’m more positive around her than around some other friends. I’m kind, though being kind is a very different thing from denying my beliefs because she doesn’t share them. I try to avoid letting her blame herself for things.
R
Retsel
Guest
Depends.
Depression: Tragically Misunderstood
www.psychologytoday.com
If you sense he/she may be truly depressed encourage them to see a Doctor.
H
Horton
Guest
If they are situational depressed, try to lighten the mood, provide positive feedback, pray for them, be a good friend.
If they suffer from clinical depression urge them to seek medical attention. Go with them if that makes them feel better about it. Depression is easily treated most often through medication and therapy. There is no shame in having clinical depression, it is an illness of the brain and not something one can control with will power.
I have suffered with clinical depression for over 20 years. I take medications to control the symptoms and I live a very full life. I realize there is no cure so I never stop taking my meds because I feel better and I am quick to see my doctor if there is a change.
If they suffer from clinical depression urge them to seek medical attention. Go with them if that makes them feel better about it. Depression is easily treated most often through medication and therapy. There is no shame in having clinical depression, it is an illness of the brain and not something one can control with will power.
I have suffered with clinical depression for over 20 years. I take medications to control the symptoms and I live a very full life. I realize there is no cure so I never stop taking my meds because I feel better and I am quick to see my doctor if there is a change.
M
MasterXploder7
Guest
I jumped onto my computer after seeing this on my phone because I wanted to be able to type out my thoughts on depression in other people and how I’ve found the best ways to handle it.
So to start this essay of possible Senior Thesis proportions, its important to note that being the second or third party in a person with depression’s life is fairly difficult. You essentially play a “Meta-Game” - meaning that your goal is the win the total set of all games and not any one particular game (unless its life threatening for that individual). What do I mean by the set of all games? Why do I bring up the idea of games? This is just the terminology used by Jordan Peterson in describing how children learn to play, “its okay if you lose a game here and there because the goal is to get other kids to keep playing, if you win all the time they wont want to play because they never win,” this best describes what I mean by the “meta-game”.
Regarding the meta-game you go through with your depressed friends, the goal is make every interaction you have as positive as it can be, even if the focus is negative of the interaction is negative. The goal is to reinforce love, respect and kindness in each interaction. So your friend just got in a bad break up? Talk it out with them, whether they just vent or think out loud. They feel like they can’t do anything right? Provide evidence to the contrary, point out ways they could genuinely improve that they can see and be able to see themselves do or take them out and have some fun and show them that they are good at being your friend. Be creative with how you reinforce positivity but most importantly just let it flow from the heart.
If they aren’t socially awkward or blatant introverts then invite them into your group of friends. I am introvert, when I make a friend I only really care about that one friend, everyone is just peripheral to me by comparison to the bond I have with that one individual and I end up doing the “follow that person around like a lost puppy routine” but the overall goal with this is to get them to have more friends that can help reinforce the ideas I’ve presented in the previous paragraphs (which means you have carefully selected who you expose them to).
Another thing to be aware of is that the social expectations of society. To hell with society. If you think the only way to help your friend is by having a night out or calling in sick to school/work and going to spend time with them, then go for it. If your friends and family think that is too much then don’t understand whats at stake. I’ve found the majority of people refuse to seek medical help for their depression (because that’s what depression does to us). Don’t let people get in the way of helping people you care about.
That’s all I can type for now, I know its not very in-depth but I’m sick and the benadryl I took early is kicking in and making me tired. I hope this helps.
So to start this essay of possible Senior Thesis proportions, its important to note that being the second or third party in a person with depression’s life is fairly difficult. You essentially play a “Meta-Game” - meaning that your goal is the win the total set of all games and not any one particular game (unless its life threatening for that individual). What do I mean by the set of all games? Why do I bring up the idea of games? This is just the terminology used by Jordan Peterson in describing how children learn to play, “its okay if you lose a game here and there because the goal is to get other kids to keep playing, if you win all the time they wont want to play because they never win,” this best describes what I mean by the “meta-game”.
Regarding the meta-game you go through with your depressed friends, the goal is make every interaction you have as positive as it can be, even if the focus is negative of the interaction is negative. The goal is to reinforce love, respect and kindness in each interaction. So your friend just got in a bad break up? Talk it out with them, whether they just vent or think out loud. They feel like they can’t do anything right? Provide evidence to the contrary, point out ways they could genuinely improve that they can see and be able to see themselves do or take them out and have some fun and show them that they are good at being your friend. Be creative with how you reinforce positivity but most importantly just let it flow from the heart.
If they aren’t socially awkward or blatant introverts then invite them into your group of friends. I am introvert, when I make a friend I only really care about that one friend, everyone is just peripheral to me by comparison to the bond I have with that one individual and I end up doing the “follow that person around like a lost puppy routine” but the overall goal with this is to get them to have more friends that can help reinforce the ideas I’ve presented in the previous paragraphs (which means you have carefully selected who you expose them to).
Another thing to be aware of is that the social expectations of society. To hell with society. If you think the only way to help your friend is by having a night out or calling in sick to school/work and going to spend time with them, then go for it. If your friends and family think that is too much then don’t understand whats at stake. I’ve found the majority of people refuse to seek medical help for their depression (because that’s what depression does to us). Don’t let people get in the way of helping people you care about.
That’s all I can type for now, I know its not very in-depth but I’m sick and the benadryl I took early is kicking in and making me tired. I hope this helps.
R
Retsel
Guest
Depression can lead to an early death. Listening and understanding the difference between depression, mood swings and a person’s personally is critical.
The following was taken from: Helping Someone with Depression - HelpGuide.org
Ways to start the conversation:
“I have been feeling concerned about you lately.”
“Recently, I have noticed some differences in you and wondered how you are doing.”
“I wanted to check in with you because you have seemed pretty down lately.”
Questions you can ask:
“When did you begin feeling like this?”
“Did something happen that made you start feeling this way?”
“How can I best support you right now?”
“Have you thought about getting help?”
Remember, being supportive involves offering encouragement and hope. Very often, this is a matter of talking to the person in language that they will understand and can respond to while in a depressed state of mind.
The following was taken from: Helping Someone with Depression - HelpGuide.org
Ways to start the conversation:
“I have been feeling concerned about you lately.”
“Recently, I have noticed some differences in you and wondered how you are doing.”
“I wanted to check in with you because you have seemed pretty down lately.”
Questions you can ask:
“When did you begin feeling like this?”
“Did something happen that made you start feeling this way?”
“How can I best support you right now?”
“Have you thought about getting help?”
Remember, being supportive involves offering encouragement and hope. Very often, this is a matter of talking to the person in language that they will understand and can respond to while in a depressed state of mind.
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Retsel
Guest
I personally believe the increase* in suicide is directly related to mass-media/secularism’s failure to deliver on it’s “promise” of happiness.
Pray, and try to get her to go to church.
Encourage her to watch EWTN. (Streaming tv is the best way. A cheap Roku can be attached to any tv and you don’t have to change your other subscriptions. Just the (name removed by moderator)ut.)
[https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/databriefs/db330_tables-508.pdf]
Pray, and try to get her to go to church.
Encourage her to watch EWTN. (Streaming tv is the best way. A cheap Roku can be attached to any tv and you don’t have to change your other subscriptions. Just the (name removed by moderator)ut.)
[https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/databriefs/db330_tables-508.pdf]
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