Do you tend to attract a "type" of person?

[Bataar]

It seems I only attract invisible people who, through some possible transdimensional interference, are unable to speak or touch

 

[Rascalking]

I tend to be attracted to African-American women who are modest and quiet, but super strong and independent. My best releationships have always been with black women.

I guess I attract that type too!

 

[cviolette]

I used to have the same problem but luckily I can’t handle anyone telling me what I can and can’t do so any relationship with dudes of that sort never last long.

Smart girl

Ok, I guess I missed mentioning the type of men who are NOT attracted to me… and these would be it. I have too much of a stubborn personality for these types of men.

LOL! I don’t attract nice guys. Either that or I just never noticed them.

Stubborn can be good

 

[StarSapphire]

I know what I attract and oh dear

Truth is I get a disturbing number of post middle-aged men admitting their feelings for me, which is awkward and very, very stressful, because they are usually friends or colleagues and one can’t just ignore them afterwards, making things very, very difficult. Nor is it very flattering - after all, I want men my age to be interested!

Then when I do get on with a man my age, they turn out to be very, very, very sweet. And spoken for.

I think I shall just give up. I am very proud of being able to keep myself for marriage only, there are not many my age who can claim virginity after all, but in all humility it’s not been very difficult!

I sometimes wonder if it’s me… I mean, surely a 30 year old woman who’s not ugly (I’m not beautiful or pretty, but I’m not off-putting either) should have attracted a nice, outward going young man who should have asked me out at some point, instead of incredibly sweet spoken for ones and older men? Perhaps I put people off, perhaps I am too abrupt, or not girly enough, or perhaps they just prefer other people and I just sort of am so middling that they’re not intrerested?

Agh, it’s 2 in the morning over here. I always get too introspective after midnight. I’ll feel fine by morning

 

[TheRealJuliane]

It seems I only attract invisible people who, through some possible transdimensional interference, are unable to speak or touch

You are funny.

 

[chevalier]

Without trying to sound vain, I attracted "everyone! Lol. By the time I met my husband i was praying that he will be the ONE guy who won’t ask me out. No such luck some people might think that that’s a good problem to have but in reality it is a huge burden. I knew i could never develop real friendships with ANY guy because it was only a matter of time before they’d ask me out. I had a single guy friend who i truly believed felt as paltonically about me as I did about him, only to have him admit his feelings several years later. Needless to say, that friendship was ruined and it was the last close friendship I ever Had with a guy.

I’m so happy I’m married, I finally feel like i no longer have to be on the defence. My husband, my wedding band and my children are the best men repellents

The only men i felt/ feel safe around were Asians. Never Had one come after me.

Hey, falling in love with you is not an attack on you! In fact, it’s the opposite. Asking you out while being a friend is not a foul act either. Neither of these is a breach of trust or means you can’t trust the person.

I sometimes wonder if it’s me… I mean, surely a 30 year old woman who’s not ugly (I’m not beautiful or pretty, but I’m not off-putting either) should have attracted a nice, outward going young man who should have asked me out at some point, instead of incredibly sweet spoken for ones and older men? Perhaps I put people off, perhaps I am too abrupt, or not girly enough, or perhaps they just prefer other people and I just sort of am so middling that they’re not intrerested?

Maybe you have an intimidating bearing. I’ve been told that’s the case with me.

There is definitely some time travel going on…

There’s loss of interest, or a red flag appearing and influencing the decision, or some kind of knee-jerk reaction, this is hard to say. Many of them do try to come to me on their own afterwards, generally when I’ve processed their rejection and come to terms with it.

 

[1inICXC]

Hey, falling in love with you is not an attack on you! In fact, it’s the opposite. Asking you out while being a friend is not a foul act either. Neither of these is a breach of trust or means you can’t trust the person.
.

Absolutely not. But you cannot enjoy a simple friendship with someone who is hoping for more- without a certain degree of awkwardness and frustration-,rejection is totally unpleasant on both sides, being pursued does eventually get tiring and, laslty, you have a bunch of girl friends envying you, so can see how it’s not an ideal situation to be in.
A lot of the guys were in fact great guys but if they’re not the one, they’re not the one. I would’ve loved to have them as friends but that didn’t work out with any of them.

Anyway, God is great, He spared me of a lot by letting me meet my DH very young.

 

[liturgy96]

I tend to attract intellectual people, probably because I tend to discuss many academic things, especially those related to the natural sciences (Biology, Chemistry, etc.), social sciences, theology and philosophy Also, I have found that it is usually the older people who admire me more than the younger ones (probably because of my old-fashioned values?)

 

[chevalier]

Absolutely not. But you cannot enjoy a simple friendship with someone who is hoping for more- without a certain degree of awkwardness and frustration-,rejection is totally unpleasant on both sides, being pursued does eventually get tiring and, laslty, you have a bunch of girl friends envying you, so can see how it’s not an ideal situation to be in.
A lot of the guys were in fact great guys but if they’re not the one, they’re not the one. I would’ve loved to have them as friends but that didn’t work out with any of them.

Yes, I know. Believe me, it ain’t any lighter on ya, when you’re the guy. Conveying the bad news to a girl is a thoroughly awful thing to do and place to be in — obviously, she’s probably got it much worse, but anyway. Men aren’t made to inflict suffering on women.

I suppose I simply failed to see how difficult this was on the woman’s side, though, when I was younger. I didn’t really think it was difficult, you know, just tell the guy etc. Apparently, it ain’t that simple.

Anyway, as a man, it’s always been hard to take that women tend to equalize interest with harassment way too often, which makes you feel like a creep for just simply being interested, which is not what things should be like. A no is a no, obviously, but being interested is neither a crime nor anything shameful. As a society, we fail to appreciate this fact.

But I’m beginning to sound like some kind of wishy-washy liberal or leftie, so I’d better stop right here and now. Have a good day!

Anyway, God is great, He spared me of a lot by letting me meet my DH very young.

Oh certainly. One of my biggest regrets in life is that I’ve missed out on that sort of thing, as much as I’ve always desired it. There was probably no other way given my personality; ultimately I probably wouldn’t have it any other way and all, but it’s still a shame. Growing up together since a young age is a wonderful thing and the greatest for bonding.

 

[styrgwillidar]

Nah… I repulse everybody.

 

[LaughingBoy1503]

Between the ages of 18 and about 24 I attracted young girls. Never dated any of them but it annoyed me being 24 and it was 16 year old girls giving me googly eyes instead of girls my own age.

Though I have only been in a relationship with one, I have dated/talked to a lot of women who work in the education field. I cannot figure out if I am attracted to teachers or they are attracted to me. Maybe a little of both. I also have always attracted large sized women too. But, I think they just tend to be the most bold and a lot of people attract them.

 

[mdleagedguy]

I tend to attract women who are married to me. Every time I go home there’s this woman I’m married to who flirts with me incessantly. She tries to hug me all the time, and other things… She even wants me to sleep with her every night. She’s always giving me googly eyes. It’s been going on for 25 years now. I don’t think it’s going to let up soon. :heart:

 

[daisybee]

I tend to attract women who are married to me. Every time I go home there’s this woman I’m married to who flirts with me incessantly. She tries to hug me all the time, and other things… She even wants me to sleep with her every night. She’s always giving me googly eyes. It’s been going on for 25 years now. I don’t think it’s going to let up soon. :heart:

That made me laugh!

LaughingBoy, are you concerned about the women you have been attracting? Do you want to attract women with other interests/backgrounds?

If you are continuing to attract women who are quite a bit younger, would you rather not? Do you somehow get to know them with an “older brother” kind of approach rather than as a peer?

 

[pensmama87]

I tend to attract women who are married to me. Every time I go home there’s this woman I’m married to who flirts with me incessantly. She tries to hug me all the time, and other things… She even wants me to sleep with her every night. She’s always giving me googly eyes. It’s been going on for 25 years now. I don’t think it’s going to let up soon. :heart:

Thankfully, the fact that I’m usually herding kids around in public helps a lot with unwanted attention (I don’t usually attract the people who think they can offer parents advice, either.)

I’m not unattractive, but even when I was younger and single I rarely got attention from total strangers outside of normal politeness (unless I was oblivious, which is possible). But I avoided situations where I was alone and vulnerable. The only total strangers who “hit on me” were much, much older than me and clearly…not quite right in the head. There was one scary incident at a dance party where I was literally grabbed by someone I couldn’t see and started getting herded toward a dark corner of the room. Thankfully a friend swooped in and got me out of that mess.

With people I knew, the guys who crushed on me were generally quiet and nerdy types (just like me! )

 

[Crown_of_Stars]

I seem to attract men who are about twenty years older than me, but they are fatherly and always very thoughtful of me. But I just don’t want it. If I were to be with someone, he would have to be closer to my own age. And not younger, either.

 

[LaughingBoy1503]

That made me laugh!

LaughingBoy, are you concerned about the women you have been attracting? Do you want to attract women with other interests/backgrounds?

If you are continuing to attract women who are quite a bit younger, would you rather not? Do you somehow get to know them with an “older brother” kind of approach rather than as a peer?

That was when I was in my early 20’s. I am 30 now. I do not even know any 16 year old girls other than maybe a cousin of mine. It is not a problem now-a-days.

Sometimes I wish more regular sized women would come onto me as boldly as some large sized women have in the past. Not that I do not like larger women. I do like some. I am not super skinny myself. I am 5"10 about 210 currently. I guess it would be nice to attract more women. period. Just not teens!

 

[Sarcelle]

It seems I only attract invisible people who, through some possible transdimensional interference, are unable to speak or touch

I seem to attract Australian Shepherds, the canine breed. Each dog of that breed seem to be like me a lot.

 

[realtiger]

No. I don’t seem to attract anyone.