Does God change your vocation?

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In light of recent news about Fr. Francis Mary Stone this has brought up some questions for me not relating to his particular case but in general.

I have read in the lives of Saints that some have been married and raised families and then been called to the religious life or priesthood. Did God change their vocation? Or did they choose to ignore their calling at an earlier stage and God just allowed circumstances to be rearranged to help them ultimately fulfill what should have been done in the first place?

Also is it an “either/or” situation between the Sacraments of Matrimony or Ordination—obviously it can’t be cut and dry as it appears or else the Eastern Churches would not allow priests who are already married…so is it the vow of celibacy that is violated or something else? Can you actually partake of BOTH Sacraments-celibacy notwithstanding?

And how are the wives formally prepared for the priesthood of their husbands in the ECs? Do they also attend Seminary? What about the wives of Permanent Deacons–do they take classes or something? Do the wives make vows too?

I am not asking this to start controversy so I would appreciate it if I could get actually answers and not arguments.
 
The easy answer first. Wives of deacons often take the classes with them but they do not take any vows. They do have to agree with their husbands answer to the call to be a deacon.

There have been many cases of married folks either becoming priests or religious after being married and raising a family. I am not inclined to believe that it is so much a change of vocation or a mistaken first choice as it is God who continues to form us and mold us through our own spouse and children. The lessons learned in the “domestic church” can have a powerful effect who we become. The widower or widow are often very different people than the young’un that got married. Just living continues to form us for better or worse into a “new creation.”

Never having had a vocation to the priesthood I cannot speak with any authority of what happens to a priest as he lives out his days. I would imagine they too undergo change and growth for better or worse.

I do think that some make mistakes in discerning their vocation to marriage, religious life, or the priesthood. Married people sometimes make mistakes in choosing a mate, but have an obligation to keeping their vows. Priests and religious also take vows, but although considered permanent they can be dispensed from them. Considering the number of people a priest or religious has a direct influence on that in my opinion may be a wise situation in terms of damage control.
 
God CALLS all of us, at every moment, to do His will to accomplish His ends, for which He provides us the necessary graces. That is a vocation shared by all.

God INVITES some people to very specific vocations, e.g., marriage or the religious life. In these instances, those who are invited may decline for whatever reason, and that’s OK with God.

Finally, if, e.g., we look at the life of St. Thomas More, do we ask, did God call Him to be married, only to take his wife? Did God call him to be married a second time, only to have him martyred? Did More’s vocation change from time to time?

Since “Thy Will be done,” every day I attempt to discern God’s will for me - for each day. If one strings the days together, one may conclude, “Ah ha! Your vocation is to spend your life in search of a vocation and never find it!” That, by the way, is what Thomas Merton suggested was his vocation.

What to do? Listen for God’s direction, follow what we believe to be His direction, and enjoy life.

May God Bless,

Monk
 
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