Does God only want married couples to have sex a limited amount of times?

[Miiiils]

Sex is for 2 reasons, and when we have sex, these should be the reason for the act:

• Creating life
• Bond between married couples

Let’s say a couple could only afford to have 2 children, and they have 2 children. They can barely afford it, and could definitely not afford another. Is sex basically out of the question from now on?

Once a married couple has the amount of kids they can afford, are they supposed to stop having sex, since the REASON for it is to have children?

I’m struggling with this because I am getting married in the in a couple years, and sort of want to know what to expect.

 

[1ke]

Sex is for 2 reasons, and when we have sex, these should be the reason for the act:

• Creating life
• Bond between married couples

Not exactly.

The conjugal act is ordered to both unity and procreation. That is not the same as “these should be the reason for the act”.

Let’s say a couple could only afford to have 2 children, and they have 2 children. They can barely afford it, and could definitely not afford another. Is sex basically out of the question from now on?

No

Once a married couple has the amount of kids they can afford, are they supposed to stop having sex, since the REASON for it is to have children?

No. You are not properly understanding marital intimacy. The marital act must be properly ordered to both unity and procreation. What that means is that we must take no action that renders the act sterile or not unitive. A spouse using force to have sex (rape) would be a sin against being ordered to unity. Contraception a sin against being ordered to procreation.

I’m struggling with this because I am getting married in the in a couple years, and sort of want to know what to expect.

I suggest you read some books on Catholic sexuality. The Good News about Sex and Marriage comes to mind.

I’m not sure where you’ve picked up the idea that you can only have sexual relations when you are actively trying to have a child, but that is not Church teaching.

 

[Miiiils]

Thanks for the thoughtful replies! It’s not a topic I have thought about much before this, so I’m not surprised at all I am misunderstand a lot.

Follow-up/clarification:

The trouble I’m having is that once you reach the point where you can’t afford to have any more children, how can you justify still having sex? What if you have another kid? Obviously God will take care of you, but like i’m thinking we have to be reasonable as well.

 

[1ke]

The trouble I’m having is that once you reach the point where you can’t afford to have any more children, how can you justify still having sex?

The marital act is both unitive and procreative. If it is properly ordered, the couple is free to engage in act. It is objectively UNITIVE as well as objective ordered to procreation. If a couple uses the infertile times of the woman’s cycle, or if a woman is post menopausal, or if a couple is sterile due to disease or defect, they still engage in a properly ordered marital act. They have not taken any action to make the act disordered in any way.

God designed our bodies to be naturally infertile during certain times of the month. God designed our bodies to be infertile after menopause. Couples can come together in the marital embrace during those times.

What if you have another kid?

Then you have another kid.

If a couple has a serious reason to avoid, then they might CHOOSE to abstain for a lengthy period of time. But if they don’t abstain they haven’t done anything wrong or sinful.

 

[1ke]

Perhaps you should also look into the natural family planning courses offered by your diocese so that you can get a better understanding of spacing/planning children in a moral way.

 

[0Scarlett_nidiyilii]

Also, don’t assume that the good life consists in expensive brand names and restaurant dinners.