Don't know what to do anymore about porn and masturbation addiction

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akiharu

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Feels like I’ve tried everything, but for years I haven’t been able to not do it for even a month. What do I do?

I’ve tried praying the rosary every day, but eventually I still fall back.

Prayers are obviously appreciated, but does anyone that’s struggled with similar things have any tips and guidance on what to do?
 
Put briefly, what I’ve seen and experienced that works best for any compulsive behavior: accountability, keeping busy, and therapy. Frequent confession also helps.

At some point you may have to accept that this will be a major temptation for you. That does NOT mean you need to give into it.

ETA: There’s also roughly a million threads on this at CAF. The search function will help, and there’s lots of suggestions. But what I mentioned above tends to emerge as some of the most common advice.
 
Here are some things I do.
  1. When temptation becomes strong, I get up and go for a walk. This will help focus the mind on other tasks.
  2. download the EWTN app. On the app is the Bible. It has an audio option.
    Every night before I go to bed, I pick a book in the New Testament and play the audio.
    I put the sleep timer on for 60 min. This really helps me a lot. Within about 20 minutes I am sound asleep.
  3. If Married talk to your spouse about the situation. They can help. Could be you need more intimacy in your relationship.
  4. Every time you masterbate, go to confession as soon as possible.
  5. Realize about 99% of these girls in the videos are doing a job. A good majority of them are forced into it by someone. Most are on drugs. If these women could, they would do something else. They are victims in a brutal industry. Think about that before you give in.
These are just some tips.

By doing the above, I have essentially ceased my issue on this as well. The best thing for me was the Bible app and listening to the audio for inspiration.
 
Cmc1972 said:
  1. Realize about 99% of these girls in the videos are doing a job. A good majority of them are forced into it by someone. Most are on drugs. If these women could, they would do something else. They are victims in a brutal industry. Think about that before you give in.
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This answer is the best one, no one knows about porn more than me, I had strong personal ties with many porn actresses, most of them did it because they are in debt or divorced with children to support, for the older ones, or bored and jobless for the younger generation.

It is not a glorious way or why wouldn’t they use their own names instead or the fake ones.

As for the struggling, it is a lifetime one, depending on your level of addiction, you cannot get rid of it in one day.

Keep fighting the good fight if you are single try getting a girlfriend, although it is near impossible for a porn addict to do, you will change your perspective about women.
 
Never stop struggling against it. Pray, confess, and keep hope that, with the Holy Spirit, you can overcome the chains these things have on you.

I struggle with similar things too! I believe that we need to truly detest these things in order to turn away from them. And sometimes it has to take seeing (experiencing) the harm that they do, for us to hate them.
 
Thanks for sharing akiharu
I struggle with this as well
There is a group here on CAF titled “Chastity Support Group”, you may join and check in.

If you’re serious about wanting to stop, you may see if there’s any SA or SAA meetings in your area. The programs work, people do attain sobriety.

Another suggestion is to try to incorporate these 4 things into your daily routine:
Prayer (on your knees), Journaling, Reading (recovery specific), and checking in with someone who can help keep you accountable.
 
akiharu said:
Feels like I’ve tried everything, but for years I haven’t been able to not do it for even a month. What do I do?

I’ve tried praying the rosary every day, but eventually I still fall back.

Prayers are obviously appreciated, but does anyone that’s struggled with similar things have any tips and guidance on what to do?
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Pray a lot, divine mercy and the rosary. Try to go to confession asap. Jesus will forgive you as long as ask with a contrite heart. And last but not least go to mass!

Even if you pray the Rosary don’t do mindless repetition. focus on the mysteries of the words you are saying. Beg the Blessed Mother and Jesus Christ for help in this situation. Ask for grace and the Holy Spirit. Do not ever think you can never be forgiven as if anything, we are drowning in Jesus’ mercy. Resist the temptation as much as possible and think of the crucified Christ when you feel like masturbating. Ask yourself would this hurt him more or help him more?

Best wishes,
Dallas
 
Not the first time this topic has been mentioned on these forums. I suggest you do a keyword search. For example, this recent thread might be helpful, link.
 
For Catholics struggling with pornography use/masturbation, the idea of seeking therapy can be iffy at best. You have to keep in mind that outside of our Catholic bubble, most of society doesn’t find anything unusual or objectionable in viewing pornography (outside of the truly deviant/illegal stuff) or masturbation (unless it’s compulsive…like someone is doing it on the subway or something.) If someone goes to a therapist and says, “Once a week or so I find myself masturbating or looking at pornography” most therapists are going to be puzzled as to why you’re in their office. The response you’re likely to get is, “So? You’re describing like 95% of humanity.”
 
Someone doing that on the subway is also illegal, anywhere in public, so you could put yourself in an environment where less privacy makes you more unwilling to sin. Find some reasonable pleasure with release in going to the bathroom, without the dirty magazines of course.
 
BoomBoomMancini said:
For Catholics struggling with pornography use/masturbation, the idea of seeking therapy can be iffy at best. You have to keep in mind that outside of our Catholic bubble, most of society doesn’t find anything unusual or objectionable in viewing pornography (outside of the truly deviant/illegal stuff) or masturbation (unless it’s compulsive…like someone is doing it on the subway or something.) If someone goes to a therapist and says, “Once a week or so I find myself masturbating or looking at pornography” most therapists are going to be puzzled as to why you’re in their office. The response you’re likely to get is, “So? You’re describing like 95% of humanity.”
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To some extent, yes, but if you tell a good therapist, even one who’s secular, that you’re trying to stop a behavior that bothers you but you have difficulty doing so, they will probably help you stop. Chances are good the OP’s getting in his own way without knowing it.

But yeah, seeking out a Catholic one would probably be a good idea.
 
pensmama87 said:
To some extent, yes, but if you tell a good therapist, even one who’s secular, that you’re trying to stop a behavior that bothers you but you have difficulty doing so, they will probably help you stop. Chances are good the OP’s getting in his own way without knowing it.

But yeah, seeking out a Catholic one would probably be a good idea.
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I mean, hopefully, but they might also try to convince you that you don’t have a problem in the first place, especially if you’re describing a “normal” masturbatory habit and not “I am masturbating ten times a day” or something.

Don’t get me wrong, not trying to poo-poo the idea. I just think that we as Catholics sometimes fall into the trap of assuming our beliefs are more universal than they actually are.
 
what you need to do is force yourself to stop to cut away your ties (Jesus says what causes you to sin throw it away) so filter on your computer cant stress this enough. One is K-9 webprotection and another excellent one is Qustodio. Porn and internet connection is everyone these days and so accessible. There are tons of devices now to tablets, phones etc I would also suggest to sell a lot of them what you don’t need to limit your internet, besides how many devices do we really need to go online? Get a fliptop phone if your smart phone causes you to sin.
 
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