Duties of a Catholic Husband

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Michael16

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I’m engaged to a wonderful and beautiful Filipina and we’re both practicing Catholics.

I just got done talking with Father and here’s what I got:

In order:
  1. Help her get to Heaven.
  2. Be a good protector and provider for her and our family. Take care of her and our family; body and soul.
  3. Be faithful to her.
  4. Be open to children.
As I’m talking; I’m already assuming the duties of a husband. I’m talking of duties, not rights; as we are not yet married.
 
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I’m going to be blunt because of several past threads. You have 2 twin boys who just lost their mother. Patents that are actively trying to not have the boys raised Catholic, and a living situation that is less than desirable. Your first duty should be to your kids. Then your self. You need to get your own house in order before you take on something as complicated as what you are pursuing. I’m telling you this because there is a crisis of marriage and the understanding of what that is even among Catholics. And you seem to have too much on your plate to really be learning about the duties of a husband right now.
I have been praying for you.
 
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Could not agree with HoosierDaddy more after reading your other thread. Your priorities seem way out of wack. Of course you want to be a good husband, but you have some other serious issues on your plate before you worry about marrying someone thousands of miles away.

You seem to be getting carried away with the fun of your impending wedding and forgetting the stuff you have to work on, like, right now. I’m not trying to rain on your parade, but I do think you need to give this some thought.
 
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Best advice I can give is to be the husband and father that Paul lays out in Ephesians 5 and 6.
 
Okay; I agree with you too. I mainly posted this particular thread because I’m trying to think of it ahead of time. We don’t plan on applying for the visa until 2022. I agree that I need to get my living situation settled and put my kids first before I bring my better half here.
 
Thanks, Hoosier. I do have to think of my kids and myself. I have gotten carried away. I was just trying to think of all of these things ahead of time.
 
Michael16 said:
Okay; I agree with you too. I mainly posted this particular thread because I’m trying to think of it ahead of time. We don’t plan on applying for the visa until 2022. I agree that I need to get my living situation settled and put my kids first before I bring my better half here.
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It’s all good. Like I said, I don’t mean to a bummer. It’s all good stuff to think about; you just don’t want to get so wrapped up in the future that you fail to address the issues of the present.

2022 is a long engagement. If you don’t mind my asking, how did you meet her/how long have you known her?
 
We met on CatholicMatch.com back in December of 2017 and we’ve been engaged since I visited her in September of 2018. She wants to wait for her son to graduate high school before we apply for the visa.
 
I think it’s good that you have a long engagement. Getting engaged to someone the first time you physically meet them is, well, unusual. Not saying it cant work, but it’s very possible to build castles in the air with stuff like this.
 
Well, I actually proposed to her on Facebook before that; but, we needed her parents’ blessing and to physically meet before we made it official.
 
Just be careful. Marrying someone you barely know (chatting on Facebook doesn’t really count) is very risky imo.
 
Good point. However; I’m pretty sure about her and she’s pretty sure about me. We talk every day on Facebook Messenger and often over the phone and we meshed very well when we met.
 
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