Eastern Catholic thought on marriage and family

[DL82]

Although a European born and bred, I’ve always had something of a suspicion for Western romantic notions around courtship and marital love. I’ve heard it said that people in the East think differently about this. I’d be interested to try to understand a little about how Eastern Christian tradition views the vocation to marriage, particularly anyone who can speak from first-hand or family experience of concepts like matchmakers, betrothal, and the role of extended family networks.

I hope this doesn’t come across as ignorant or offensive, but I admit my own ignorance at the outset. Please educate me.

 

[DL82]

Sorry to bump my own post, but are there really no answers?

Maybe I should pose the question differently (particularly as many of you are American Eastern Catholics) - do these different approaches to marriage and courting that were traditional in the East still apply, or still have an influence, among Eastern Catholics today? If so, in what way?

 

[dixieagle]

Sorry to bump my own post, but are there really no answers?

Maybe I should pose the question differently (particularly as many of you are American Eastern Catholics) - do these different approaches to marriage and courting that were traditional in the East still apply, or still have an influence, among Eastern Catholics today? If so, in what way?

Well, I’ll jump in. I’ve been married for 35 years to a Ruthenian Catholic. His parents were first generation native-born Americans, with his grandparents having come from near Uzhorod in what was then Austria-Hungary, and is now inside the borders of Ukraine (Carpathian mountain region, I believe.)

I can’t say that I noticed any difference at all in his family’s attitude toward courtship and marriage from my Irish Catholic family’s. Certainly the notion of matchmaking never entered the picture. I do know that there was a girl who went to college with us whose parents were Ukrainian-born and were very strict about whom she dated, pretty much insisting on only young men of Ukrainian background.

Our wedding incorporated both Eastern and Latin tradition; the nuptial Mass was Latin Rite, and the actual wedding vows, etc. were Ruthenian. I remember that all my friends just loved the Eastern aspects, with slightly different vows, if I recall.

Perhaps others have had different experiences, but that’s about all I can come up with.

 

[mariyka]

I’d be interested to try to understand a little about how Eastern Christian tradition views the vocation to marriage, particularly anyone who can speak from first-hand or family experience of concepts like matchmakers, betrothal, and the role of extended family networks.

As a first-generation child of Ukrainian immigrants, I’ve experienced that marriage is seen as more than just the joining of a man and a woman, but also the joining of two families. This may be a cultural, as opposed to a religious observation.

 

[jamiee]

It’s a joining of families and possible two different cultures, it’s important in Eastern Catholics… atleast I think?

 

[Diak]

I would agree with Mariyka - it is much more of a communal, cultural and social joining together.

But there is a great degree of variation on how strictly one follows all of the cultural traditions. All of the intricate courtship and marriage traditions and rituals just in the Ukrainian Catholic tradition alone would involve several volumes of material.

 

[anjoh66]

I have a question relating to this.

Lets assume that two persons marry, for example a european man of latin rite and a arabic girl from maronite or chaldenian rite, thus both are catholics of different rites.

How shall their children be raised?
According to the latin or eastern rite?

 

[Angel_Gabriel]

I have a question relating to this.

Lets assume that two persons marry, for example a european man of latin rite and a arabic girl from maronite or chaldenian rite, thus both are catholics of different rites.

How shall their children be raised?
According to the latin or eastern rite?

I believe that children are always the rite/church of the father…so in this case the kids would be latin. Now, I’m not positive but i think you can get permission to have them enrolled in the mother’s church…but again, I’,m not sure…

 

[Aramis]

I have a question relating to this.

Lets assume that two persons marry, for example a european man of latin rite and a arabic girl from maronite or chaldenian rite, thus both are catholics of different rites.

How shall their children be raised?
According to the latin or eastern rite?

Vatican II said the children should be raised in the Eastern Church; if both are eastern, the church of the father. Unless both agree otherwise.