Elder marriage, continued

[roydallasmd]

I recently posted queries and received two very good replies before the post was removed due to inappropriate content. I can clearly understand. I apologize to the community for that, as my intent was to be clear and frank, not offensive.

I have a follow up question. If my fiancée and I were to marry civilly, would we be able to have relations without incurring sin? If so, we might do so and have our marriage convalidated by the Church at a later date.

Comments, please.

Thank you,

Roy Russell

 

[Tis_Bearself]

I have a follow up question. If my fiancée and I were to marry civilly, would we be able to have relations without incurring sin?

It’s my understanding that if you are Catholic, the Church expects you to marry in the church or have your marriage convalidated before you had sexual relations. The civil marriage is not sufficient.

 

[roydallasmd]

Thanks for your reply. I will, of course, also speak with a priest concerning this matter.

 

[TheLittleLady]

Catholics are bound to enter marriage under the laws of the Church and of the State. Simply schedule a meeting with your pastor to begin marital preparation.

 

[IdaCatholic]

Why would you wish to do this?
Isn’t having a holy, sacramental marriage important to you?

 

[1ke]

If my fiancée and I were to marry civilly, would we be able to have relations without incurring sin?

If by civilly you mean one or both of you is Catholic and you plan to marry outside Catholic form without dispensation, then you are not married as far as the Church is concerned. And yes, relations would be grave matter against the sixth commandment.

If so, we might do so and have our marriage convalidated by the Church at a later date.

Following the marriage laws of the church is one of the precepts of the Church. It is grave matter itself.

Go to the priest and get married the right way from the beginning.

 

[roydallasmd]

Yes, of course! But there are very pressing reasons we need to put it off for awhile, and we would like to find an acceptable means of sharing intimacy without sinning.

 

[roydallasmd]

To follow up, Ike, we would obtain a dispensation.

 

[IdaCatholic]

The pressing reasons are then also reasons to not really need the intimacy of a married couple. I’ll be blunt. You should elaborate with specifics but honestly the answer here is extremely simple. You should be concerned about your soul and her soul first and foremost and you should follow the teachings of the Church you profess.

There is something very off in your understanding of marriage and what the Church teaches and why. And it does not match up with your age.

What are you hoping to achieve or learn here?

 

[1ke]

If you obtain a dispensation from form, then there is no need for a convalidation. So I’m confused by your follow up.

Also, form isn’t dispensed if both parties are Catholic.

Go see your priest!

 

[Retsel]

Separate note: Don’t use your name in forums. Ask the mods to remove it.

 

[dollysro]

I am not sure of your reasons like everyone else and clearly you don’t want to tell us. That is your right.

I just wanted to add that convalidation is not a given; it must be requested and approved.