Elderly candidates and RCIA

[tinalewis]

I never thought I’d live to see the day, but my 100% anti-Catholic mother is asking questions about our faith and really listening to the answers and is asking me and my husband to pray for her.

I don’t expect anyone in this or any other forum to appreciate how incredible this is, but I’m about as shocked as I would be if I saw any of the biblical miracles. I know that one of my cousins (my entire family is Catholic except for my mother and my brother) has been praying for years that my mother would be open to Catholicism. Well folks, prayer works.

My question is this: Has anyone ever had any RCIA classmates who are in their 80s? Has anyone ever instructed any candidates in their 80s? My mother will be 85 this year and although she’s perfectly healthy and has all her mental faculties ***(obviously!!!), ***I don’t like her driving at night, and that includes weekly RCIA classes. The only ones I know about are held in the evenings. Right now, I would only hope that someone would give her a ride to and from, but that would have to be worked out.

Does anyone know of RCIA to accommodate the elderly?

Bonus: if my mother really does become Catholic, my step-father might be interested, too.

 

[twopekinguys]

I never thought I’d live to see the day, but my 100% anti-Catholic mother is asking questions about our faith and really listening to the answers and is asking me and my husband to pray for her.

I don’t expect anyone in this or any other forum to appreciate how incredible this is, but I’m about as shocked as I would be if I saw any of the biblical miracles. I know that one of my cousins (my entire family is Catholic except for my mother and my brother) has been praying for years that my mother would be open to Catholicism. Well folks, prayer works.

My question is this: Has anyone ever had any RCIA classmates who are in their 80s? Has anyone ever instructed any candidates in their 80s? My mother will be 85 this year and although she’s perfectly healthy and has all her mental faculties ***(obviously!!!), ***I don’t like her driving at night, and that includes weekly RCIA classes. The only ones I know about are held in the evenings. Right now, I would only hope that someone would give her a ride to and from, but that would have to be worked out.

Does anyone know of RCIA to accommodate the elderly?

Bonus: if my mother really does become Catholic, my step-father might be interested, too.

It sounds like your mother is making a step in the right direction.

I am the lay director of RCIA in our parish, and have had several dealings with this type of situation.

Don’t sell your mother short on this. I have one catechist on my team that is 96 years old. I have several sponsors (volunteer every year) that are in their late 70’s, and early 80’s. None of them miss any sessions. Winter and all. (of course, we give them priority parking, etc.)

There are several options here, but alot will depend on the parish’s RCIA program, and resources.

My first question is. Is there a reason you cannot be your mother’s sponsor? Driving her back and forth, etc.? What better gift to give your mother than to be her sponsor.

Have you talked to your parish’s RCIA coordinator or team, to see if she might be able to receive some sort of private instruction? We have a couple of catechists that do this when people are unable to attend the regularly scheduled sessions due to work schedules, or health issues. They may also be able to set her up with a sponsor, or team member that would be willing to pick her up, and drop her off for the sessions.

Check with the parish. I am sure they can work with her, and you.

 

[tinalewis]

Thank you for your very kind response. My mother lives on the east coast and I live in the midwest, otherwise you bet I’d play chauffeur. I just don’t like her driving at night (for that matter I’m not the best night-driver myself so it must run in the family.)

In her hometown, there is one small Catholic church that’s practically within walking distance of her house but the one she really enjoys visiting is a 15-minute-drive away and it’s larger, more modern architecture appeals to her, and she likes one of the priests very much (he’s around her age - we’d better move fast!). I would think that parish is large enough to have someone available who would be willing to drive her to and from classes. I will definitely give them a call and find out what accommodations they can provide.

How ironic it would be if she wound up attending RCIA at the small Catholic church that’s closest by. That was the church I wanted to join when I was 12 years old and she refused to even talk with anyone at the church or to drive me to Mass.

Quite amazing!!! Times change, people change. Now I believe anything’s possible!

 

[PJM]

I never thought I’d live to see the day, but my 100% anti-Catholic mother is asking questions about our faith and really listening to the answers and is asking me and my husband to pray for her.

I don’t expect anyone in this or any other forum to appreciate how incredible this is, but I’m about as shocked as I would be if I saw any of the biblical miracles. I know that one of my cousins (my entire family is Catholic except for my mother and my brother) has been praying for years that my mother would be open to Catholicism. Well folks, prayer works.

My question is this: Has anyone ever had any RCIA classmates who are in their 80s? Has anyone ever instructed any candidates in their 80s? My mother will be 85 this year and although she’s perfectly healthy and has all her mental faculties ***(obviously!!!), ***I don’t like her driving at night, and that includes weekly RCIA classes. The only ones I know about are held in the evenings. Right now, I would only hope that someone would give her a ride to and from, but that would have to be worked out.

Does anyone know of RCIA to accommodate the elderly?

Bonus: if my mother really does become Catholic, my step-father might be interested, too.

AGE is not the issue. RCIA, our Catholic faith is fo everyone God call’s. And yes, I am aware of candidates in thre 90’s. God is a Gracious God, slow to anger

Keep praying. IF HEALTH is an issue get you’re priest involved ASAP!

Love and prayers,

 

[Prague]

I was a the sponsor for an 85 year old retired Marine. He took a little extra work, but we made it and stayed friends until he passed away. I was the third sponsor he went through!!!
First two were guys, and yes, I am a female!

 

[T_Hope]

How ironic it would be if she wound up attending RCIA at the small Catholic church that’s closest by. That was the church I wanted to join when I was 12 years old and she refused to even talk with anyone at the church or to drive me to Mass.

Quite amazing!!! Times change, people change. Now I believe anything’s possible!

With God all things ARE possible. I feel your happiness. You and your mother are surely in my prayers. Please let us know how things are going!

Hope

 

[tinalewis]

Thank you, Hope! I’m grateful for your prayers.

My mother’s come so far, it’s amazing. In the 1970’s she wouldn’t hear of anything Catholic and now she’s asking great questions and is rapt with attention to the answers.

I think what really got her going was the work my parish does with the poor. She asked “You mean you really have a food bank right there in the church where hungry people just stop by?”. She told me that none of the Protestant churches she’s ever attended did anything more than send a couple of parishioners to volunteer for Meals-on-Wheels once a month.

Last Fall I sent my mother the 2010 St. Joseph Sunday Missal - you know, the tiny pocket-sized one - and she says she reads the scripture every Sunday.

**Holy Scripture and the poor ** can claim yet another Tiber swimmer! I think that really bears repeating a thousand times: the Word of God and the poor, the Word of God and the poor, the Word of God and the poor.

 

[puzzleannie]

I Does anyone know of RCIA to accommodate the elderly?

Bonus: if my mother really does become Catholic, my step-father might be interested, too.

yes, our oldest candidate was 90.
most parishes will accommodate the needs of anyone who asks for preparation for the sacraments. Is she able to get out if someone brings her to Mass and class? If not sit down with the pastor and RCIA director and spell out her needs. We have conducted preparation sessions in nursing homes, college campuses, RV retirement parks and the like. my MIL’s sr. citizen apt. building has an RCIA class run by the parish across the street,
good job evangelizing, whoever has been talking to her

if she is already baptized her preparation needs merely to prepare her to make an informed profession of faith

 

[twopekinguys]

Thank you, Hope! I’m grateful for your prayers.

My mother’s come so far, it’s amazing. In the 1970’s she wouldn’t hear of anything Catholic and now she’s asking great questions and is rapt with attention to the answers.

I think what really got her going was the work my parish does with the poor. She asked “You mean you really have a food bank right there in the church where hungry people just stop by?”. She told me that none of the Protestant churches she’s ever attended did anything more than send a couple of parishioners to volunteer for Meals-on-Wheels once a month.

Last Fall I sent my mother the 2010 St. Joseph Sunday Missal - you know, the tiny pocket-sized one - and she says she reads the scripture every Sunday.

**Holy Scripture and the poor ** can claim yet another Tiber swimmer! I think that really bears repeating a thousand times: the Word of God and the poor, the Word of God and the poor, the Word of God and the poor.

Talking about the food pantry reminded me of a funny incident.

The town I live in only has one Catholic church. The town I work in (30 minutes away) has quite a few.

Well, I was having a problem wih our associate pastor, and I had to get it off my chest, so I made an appointment with a priest at one of the churches near where I worked.

This church was only a couple of blocks from my office, and I made the appointment for my luch hour. I showed up at the church rectory, rang the bell, and waited a moment.

The next thing I knew, here was this tiny little old lady flinging the door open and shoving a peanut butter sandwich in my hand. Keep in mind, that I have on a suit and tie. As she apologized, we both got a little chuckle out of it.

The serious portion of it though is that this tiny urban parish didn’t have a food bank, couldn’t house the homeless, but they still didn’t turn anyone away. Even if it was a simple peanut butter sandwich. It made my problem with my associate pastor kind of fade away.

I noticed in one of your previous posts that your mother has been attending Mass, and may have some sort of connection with the priest. Have her talk to the priest to see if she really needs RCIA, due to her age, knowledge, etc. He may be able to do the private instruction and bring her into the church.

 

[rwoehmke]

Over the years we have had at least two candidates and one catechumen in thier mid 80’s. I myself have been part of an RCIA team for nearly 20 years and am a shaky 74 year old. We had one candidate who was in her late 60’s who had a sponsor who was in his spry 90’s. They were friends who lived in the same Senior Housing building. As I recall the man in his 90’s was still playing soft ball on a local team.One of our 80 plus year old candidates had a stroke and died three months into the program. She was on life support and was not going to make it. She was able to receive the Anointing of the Sick the morning of the day she died. What a sad/happy joy that was for those of us on the team. They are never too old!