CARose,
Thanks for your kind words!
CARose:
I wonder why it is that you are always on the verge of leaving your Episcopal affiliation?
Well, I’m far too quick to inflict the story of my ecclesiastical wanderings on other people, so I’ll try to be concise (those who know me know to flee when they hear these words, because when they come back two hours later, I’ll probably still be talking!). I come from the “holiness” or “Wesleyan” tradition–basically my family left the Methodist Episcopal Church (now part of the United Methodist Church) about 100 years ago and founded a small, very strict denomination of their own. They were somewhat like Pentecostals but without the speaking in tongues. By the time I came along we were non-denominational and didn’t think much of any institutional church (we took the “invisible Church” idea about as far as anyone). I became interested in church history (partly because my family published devotional books and many of them were basically saints’ lives dealing with figures from the past), and this led me to question the idea that tradition and historical continuity don’t matter. I went to grad school and got to know some very devout Catholics (one of whom, Tim Gray, does a Bible study on EWTN–you may have seen him). I was in and out of RCIA for years.
I became Episcopalian in the middle of this process, because I felt the need to belong to some kind of Christian community and at that point did not feel ready to accept Catholicism. I didn’t intend to rule out the possibility of becoming Catholic in the future (I now think that this was a frivolous attitude to take to the Episcopal Church, as if it was a half-way point–but of course many evangelicals on their way to Catholicism have stopped off in Anglicanism, and it seemed logical at the time), and in fact my most serious stint in RCIA came *after *my confirmation as an Episcopalian. Anglicanism gave me much of what I valued in Catholicism (liturgy, sacramental piety, and at least the claim of apostolic succession, though I know that you guys don’t recognize our Orders!), without breaking my links with my own tradition (since John and Charles Wesley never left the Church of England, I argued that I was in fact being faithful to my “Wesleyan” heritage).
But I’ve always been uneasy with the Episcopal Church as an institution, and obviously the events of the past few years haven’t helped. Right now one of the main things keeping me Episcopalian (other than my ties to my local congregation, which I think are extremely important theologically as well as psychologically) is that I’m drawn in two different directions. I’m married to a Methodist and my parents have now become Methodists, and if I’m really going to remain within my tradition but work to make it more Catholic, the UMC is a more logical place to be than ECUSA. But at the same time, becoming Methodist would be a move away from Catholicism in important ways (particularly the fact that the UMC doesn’t even claim episcopal succession). And against a move in either direction (Methodist or Catholic), there’s my sense that I should honor my past choices even if I think they were not the best ones (the analogy here is marriage–it’s immoral to go around questioning if you married the right person–the fact that you have taken vows makes whoever you married the right person).
You’re absolutely right that if I were Catholic I’d be much happier about calling people into my communion, because I would not become Catholic unless I believed that the Catholic Church indeed had the fullness of the Faith. As it stands, I find it very hard to believe that any existing Christian body has the fullness of the Faith.
The main pull toward Catholicism is that it would be wonderful if Catholicism were true. But at this point it looks as if there is too much evidence in the other direction. If Catholicism really had the fullness of the Faith, that would be expressed in more than just official dogmas. The fact that Protestants clearly grasp some aspects of the Faith better than Catholics (and of course the reverse is true as well!) constitutes in my mind a refutation of the claim that Catholicism has the fullness of the Faith. You can only make such a claim because you limit it to matters of official dogma which are unverifiable. I have problems with papal infallibility and the Immaculate Conception and so on, but those are not the big issues for me, because ultimately how on earth would I know one way or the other? But by the only test I know how to make–practical fruit–it seems clear that no Christian church currently existing has the fullness of the Faith.
Please don’t take offense at this–I’m not here to attack Catholicism, but you asked, so I answered.
Edwin