Evangelizing the Lady

[Elijah_Baley]

I’ve been going out with a nice Lutheran girl for long enough that we’re both looking far beyond dating. She knows that I will not abandon my faith and I cannot compromise on particular beliefs.

In short, I’m on my way back to the faith — confession on Tuesday — and I want to bring her along. I want to handle this lovingly and charitably. Just ending it certainly isn’t an option at this stage. I have to give her a chance, and I don’t want to lose her. I have been praying frequently on this matter, but, knowing that God chooses not to open a heart that has turned itself away, I know that I cannot leave it just to prayer. We’ll be going to Mass together over the next few weeks, so that angle is covered.

For the record, she has said that she will not stand in the way of children being raised Catholic though she is not, and she support Catholic teaching in every way she can. Interfaith marriage isn’t ideal, though, for obvious reasons. For her sake, my sake, and for the sake of our potential children, I would want her to have a full and total and honest conversion. I am committed to trying to help her to a point where she can make an informed decision whether or not to accept that option.

Key issues between her and an honest conversion so far:

• She has no problem with non-abortive birth control. Though she’d be fine with the exclusive use of NFP instead, that she doesn’t believe the alternative is wrong is a huge issue.
• She believes prayer makes people feel better, and, whether or not God exists and hears the prayer, prayer has no other practical, earthly effect.. Because she doesn’t get an answer because of a prayer, she would rather talk with actual people who can respond.
• She believes the Bible is wholly allegory, more like the story of the human spirit, and that it contains no factual events. She seemed surprised when I told her that every biblical scholar, even those whacked-out atheist nutballs, contend Jesus of Nazareth the historical person actually existed.

If this is what it means to be Lutheran …

This is a whole darn lot, I know, but I firmly believe that this isn’t without hope. She does believe me and trust me, and I think that at this point, her beliefs are simply a matter of lack of understanding.

I’d like to show her the responses of supportive Catholics, sorely wishing for her salvation through the One Holy Catholic and Apostolic Church. Please be kind. I hate feeling like I have to remind fellow Catholics to do this. Even if I don’t show her this thread, I care for her deeply and do not enjoy seeing hateful libel directed towards her from people who’ll never meet this wonderful young lady.

Again, though: What are delicate ways to open her to the possibility of accepting Catholic teaching on these three major issues?

 

[Redbaron998]

Hey I came back to the faith when I was dating a girl, and there is a special difficulty in it since you have not been living it and wanting to bring them in can easily see it as hypocrital.

#1 by far is live the faith, and live it well. Lead by example and incorporate your faith into your daily life.

2 Pray for her, A LOT. Trying to share the faith without prayer is like trying to grow a plant without water.​

3 Take her to Mass with you, going to the Mass toghether will emerse them in the Church and is alot easier than just trying to pull them in.​

Start with these and continue being a virtuous man of God, and let the joy of your faith shine from you.

Be Kind, Charitable, and spend some study in case she ever asks you a question on the faith so you can give a informed answer.

With constant prayer and good example from your side and God working on the inside you should have a good start.

 

[petr]

This is a nice post.

My Lady was not Catholic and were already married when I came home last year.

I realized early in my own transformation that I was never going to control what this woman thought, and frankly I did not want to. What to do?

Like your Lady mine supported me also. That was enough.

My goal was to live my faith in a way that got her attention. I went to Mass alone or took whichever child I could get ready. Hey, Daddy is not so great with doing girl’s hair you know? But I went faithfully. I prayed a lot about controlling anger, frustration, and being a more gentle man at home. I studied apologetics hard. You can’t give what you don’t have.

I brought her to the RCIA class on Mary. It was sneaky, but I knew the Deacon presenting had a tremendous relationship with his wife. Once she began to understand Our Lady and how that transcends to a man’s personal relationships she was stunned. The truth is like that. Mary softens the hardest man’s heart, no?

After a year passed she began to ask questions. She knew my faith was calm strong and unwavering, just like my love for her. She is joining the Church this year.

This is your opportunity to lead like a man and show your Lady what it looks like. I don’t see any other way. She knows without a doubt not only would I fight lions for her, but I have the grace to do it.

Grace is an important ingredient. You will be tested constantly.

May the Lord bless you both and keep you in the palm of his hand on your journey together.