Ever feel trapped?

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FaithHopeCharity

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Hey yall! I’ve been feeling really down lately.

I still havnt found any good friends at my new school, studies have been getting excruciatingly difficult, and on top of all that, the world around me seems like its going to hell.

I went to Catholic school expecting I would be able to relate with my peers more on a religious level which I havnt experienced much if yet. I have people I talk to at school, but still no real friends. I take really difficult classes amd its tempting to drop out if some of them which I probably might fir mental health sake. And seeing the events happening around the world especially the rise of Atheism and Secularism, it makes me feel cornered.

I understand that the Lord will always persevere in the end and that he is always with me but I just dont know how to feel right now. I just wish the Lord would provide me with maybe a good friend to relate to or maybe even some sign of hope in the world.

Pray for me if possible, and I’ll keep yall in my prayers:)

Dominus Vobiscum
 
I am glad that you have people you talk to, but honestly, you haven’t given it very long for to decide that things are hopeless. Have you joined any clubs or sports or organizations?

I just want you to know that your situation is quite common. Concentrate on your schoolwork, and not on atheism and secularism. Just don’t pay attention to it.

God is providing you with the opportunity for an education, don’t waste it. There is always hope in the world, but we have to be willing to work for good. Do you volunteer your time anywhere? If you do, you will find that you have less time to worry about the negatives in your life.

It’s all in your attitude. 😉
 
Is your school social distancing?

Also it’s only been 2 months 🙂❤️
 
FaithHopeCharity said:
especially the rise of Atheism and Secularism
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With respect, Atheism and Secularism have always been rearing their heads all over the place.

It is not something new that just came up in recent years or even recent decades.

As for feeling trapped, I don’t mean to denigrate your feelings, but it’s normal to feel trapped when you are young, stuck in school, and don’t have the independence or resources or ability to just go do what you want and live how you want. It got better for me when I reached the point of being able to run my own life rather than parents and teachers running it for me. Hopefully it will get better for you as well. Use this time to prepare yourself for independence.
 
Irishmom2 said:
I am glad that you have people you talk to, but honestly, you haven’t given it very long for to decide that things are hopeless. Have you joined any clubs or sports or organizations?
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I was really hoping to join clubs or sports but due to the pandemic I cannot. I live 1.5 hours away from this school and my parents don’t have time to drive me there and pick me up everyday so I rely un the busses. But ever since the pandemic, the school canceled all after school bus schedules thus preventing me from partaking in sports or clubs:(
Irishmom2 said:
I just want you to know that your situation is quite common. Concentrate on your schoolwork, and not on atheism and secularism. Just don’t pay attention to it.
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I try not to, but the biggest reason I joined this school was to follow my vocation to defend the faith. I’m currently taking Catholic Moral Theology and as well as Philosophy which is awesome! But what gets to me is that I wish I could make a bigger impact. But I think the problem is is that I’m trying to get everyone to be Catholic which is unrealistic. But I try i guess
Irishmom2 said:
God is providing you with the opportunity for an education, don’t waste it. There is always hope in the world, but we have to be willing to work for good. Do you volunteer your time anywhere? If you do, you will find that you have less time to worry about the negatives in your life.

It’s all in your attitude.
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I do volunteer as an assistant catechist (assistant teacher) for a fourth grade moral theology class which is great because I get to participate an outside of school activity. But the thing is I really have no one to talk to there besides teaching children. Don’t get me wrong, I live that part but I just feel like I need something more.

Ever since I was little, I loved talking to people. I was born en extreme extrovert as I was always trying to make friends. I had so many friends in my younger days. But as I grow old, so do my peers, and with that they change. And the way I have changed recently (becoming closer to the Lord) it has been so so soon much harder to find good people I can call friend.

And so for a while, I have not felt comfort provided by anything in this world. The only thing that keeps me going is the Lord and the most Blessed Virgin Mary. They are everything to me, my best friends, I know they watch me, I pray the rosary everyday that they may give me some sort if companion one day. It is painful being so extroverted while being trapped in this situation. But what can I do besides give the pain up to the Lord. I just wish I had someone, anybody. My education holds my at most priority, but I have been born with what feels like a curse. I just wish I didn’t feel this way, I wish I didn’t want to have friends because I know I only need the Lord.

Now that I am done freaking out (lol), thank you for the reply and I will keep you in my prayers:)

Dominus Vobiscum
 
Yes, our Catholic School was an old IBM facility and the place is huge for the number of students we have. So we are able to have about 6-10 kids in a class keeping at least 10 feet apart.
 
Tis_Bearself said:
With respect, Atheism and Secularism have always been rearing their heads all over the place.

It is not something new that just came up in recent years or even recent decades.
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I dont know, I just feel like Atheism, Materialism, Securlarism and all that is growing inthe Western world and there’s something deep inside of me that feels pain for that.
Tis_Bearself said:
As for feeling trapped, I don’t mean to denigrate your feelings, but it’s normal to feel trapped when you are young, stuck in school, and don’t have the independence or resources or ability to just go do what you want and live how you want. It got better for me when I reached the point of being able to run my own life rather than parents and teachers running it for me. Hopefully it will get better for you as well. Use this time to prepare yourself for independence.
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I dont know hopefully. I was born an extreme extrovert and now that I lost all my friends because of my transition 2 years back (becoming more pure and close to the Lord) I really have no one, no one that makes me feel loved besides the Lord and his most Blessed Mother Mary. And my transition to become closer to the Lord has changed me so that I am far apart from my generations standards. Which is great, I would rather be here then not living a Holyier life. But I just have thing longing for some sort bond with another human in which they have the same faith and personality as I do.
 
I’m hearing stories like yours a lot because of the social distancing restrictions—kids go to a new school and have a hard time making new friends or else they’re not in school the same day as their friends or whatever.

In that sense, you’re really not alone.

But have you made any connections at all? Like any classmates you talk to on Instagram for instance?
 
Make contacts with people. Take the initiative in any way possible. Serve others if possible. Join a scripture study that welcomes open discussion. That’s a great way to make Christian friends.
 
Sadly, no. I havnt made any real connections. Only casual conversations between some people which I have asked to hang out but they kindly declined which is fine but I guess its not what I expected thats all.
 
I have made initiative in a sense that I have asked people to hang out. But they have all kindly declined. Scripture study isn’t available at this school or locally due to COVID restrictions. I just hope there something will make if my experience here at this new school
 
What kind of interests do you have outside of moral theology? Do you have hobbies of some kind?
 
I am going to come right out and bluntly say this.

I understand your love for the Lord and for defending the faith, but people do not want to have conversations about that all the time. Is it possible that you are “scaring people away” by talking about your faith too much?
FaithHopeCharity said:
And the way I have changed recently (becoming closer to the Lord) it has been so so soon much harder to find good people I can call friend.
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This is a little” judgey.” Jesus was friends with all kinds of people. If you are as much of an extrovert as you say you are, you would be talking to everyone, regardless of their ways.
 
FaithHopeCharity said:
I have asked people to hang out. But they have all kindly declined.
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This is a really good idea. I suggest you ask again, ask someone to go out to coffee with you, just to chat. And as Irishmom suggests, don’t just talk about your faith. That’s important, but ask your friend about their interests, concerns, and life.
Ask one person each week, or every other day, whatever you like. Eventually you will find someone who’s in the same situation you are and wants to connect. That’s how i met my best friend who I chat with weekly now that we are stuck at home.
God bless.
 
How many people have you asked to hang out? If it’s only been one or two, you might just need to keep trying. This year is… weird. Schools are offering less clubs and activities, and parents might be asking their kids to keep social bubbles small, and only meet with one or two friends in the run of a week. If you’ve tried many times, it might be time to consider how you are approaching them. High school is not primary school, where you walk up to someone and just ask to be friends. When I was in high school, it would have been a little awkward to just ask an acquaintance out to coffee, or even just to walk up and ask to hang out. You usually had a “school friendship” first, where you were in clubs or did school projects together. Have your teachers assigned group projects or anything? Also remember that most people who are really good at friendship may have A LOT of friends to share their time amongst by high school. If you’re too choosy at your age, you may find it hard to find openings (Not that you’re old in general, lol). You say that you are expecting everyone to be catholic. People might be picking up on your restrictive friendship criteria, and are worried you’ll reject them if they reveal themselves to not fit your mold.

It’s possible you’re asking too much of others…and yourself! Most high school students, even those involved with their faith, just want to hang out and have fun. Sounds like you are placing burdens of volunteering and evangelizing upon yourself. While it’s fine (great, actually!) if you want to start doing those things, few teens are ready to take on that sort of weight of the world.

What are your hobbies? Even if you can’t join a club, you can find out who is in those clubs and try to strike up a conversation:
Code: 
      You're in the school band? I can't join, but I play the sax. What's your favorite song?
      I heard you and the school football team won the game. Who's your NFL team?
      You're such a good artist! can I follow you on Instagram?
The Instagram idea from further up the thread might not be a bad idea. Even if someone can’t hang out, they might accept a Social Media connection request. If you like and comment on their stuff, they might feel differently next time you ask to go for coffee.

Don’t give up. A good friend who trusts you will introduce you to their friends, and you’ll have a crew before you know it. Just need that one first connection!
 
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