To me, it would be most logical if I either never existed, or if I always existed.
Interesting. Of course there is the possibility (the certitude if one has the faith of Christians) that I always existed in the Mind of God, and always will.
This whole thread is interesting, even though much of it is really just digging into words. But toying with words can be fun, for sure. I am put to mind of a related meaning of the word “abstract”. Long ago, every property owner had an “abstract of title”. It was a book like thing that had these partially symbolic entries representing prior transfers; deeds, mortgages, liens, even wills and divorces. It was, indeed, an “abstract” of more complex instruments recorded in the county courthouses.
But those more complex instruments were “abstract” as well, inasmuch as they stood for something other than themselves. The represented those things that affected houses, grass, trees, crops, rivers, and so on. Long ago, in early Medieval times, the transfers were more “literal” and less “abstract”. The lord would take his vassal out on the land and hand him a clod of earth before witnesses. More “literal”, less “abstract”, but both still stood for another reality.
One of the marks of a good literary work is the way it “abstracts” meanings from more tangible realities. Why all the references to flowers, for instance, in D.H. Lawrence’s work? Well, it stands for a more tangible reality. We come from the earth. We bloom, then we return to the earth. We seed before we die, in ways tangible (children) and intangible (effects of what we have done). Or at least we should do so, and that is a good portion of Lawrence’s point about what “life means”. And so, while all the flower growing and cutting and arranging are going on in his novels, people’s lives are being played out in parallel ways.
We actually all do that to one degree or another. We “abstract” (verb) meanings from things that have reality or from things that abstract from other things that have reality. All of it has existence.
But does it have meaning? Well, Jesus told parables and used symbols “look at the lilies of the field” “regard the ravens” and so on. All abstractions, and all having meaning, sometimes disturbingly so. The question is whether other things do as well. Why all the birds in James Joyce? Why the “red rocks” in Eliot’s “The Waste Land”? Why witches in “MacBeth”?
Faulkner said “…the South is haunted”. Did he mean there were ghosts flitting about In Mississippi, or did he mean there is very significant meaning in what is all around us but we think mundane? Are there powerful meanings all around us if we would just see them?
Philosophers, artists and saints try mightily to get us to see the richness of meaning in what, to us, may seem without it. Jesus Himself said “He who has eyes, let him see. He who has ears, let him hear”. Oftentimes we don’t like doing it. Sometimes seeing the world flat and gray is less troubling than looking for the messages and meanings.