Explaining Abortion?

[savedbygrace71]

At Mass yesterday, there was a full page in the bulletin for a pro life rally later in the month in our area. Included in it was an image of a baby of gestational age of about 8 weeks or so. My 7 year old can read, of course, and is curious, and said, Mommy, what is this all about?

I said, let’s talk about it later. So far he hasn’t brought it up again. How do I explain this to him when it does come up? I just don’t have the words ready in my head to explain what abortion is. For so many other topics, I can help him understand that there are two side to it. But not this- how do I tell him that some mothers kill their babies of course I would never use those words… but what words to use?

 

[EasterJoy]

Sometimes it is best to admit to a child that something is too complicated to explain right now, and will have to wait until they are a little older. You can say, “This is about helping to protect babies before they are born, while they are still growing inside their mothers. Other than that, it is complicated. I think we ought to wait to get into more details until you are older. Right now, just pray for all the mothers and their unborn babies, that they all stay safe and sound. We all need prayers.” You have to stick with it, though. “I’m sorry. I know you have a lot of questions. It is just that you’re going to have to wait a bit for answers. Sorry.”

 

[PennyinCanada]

Why not skip the abortion part until he’s older?
There are special machines that show a very small baby growing in it’s mummy’s tummy. Isn’t that awesome? It’s like Superman with xray vision!

 

[marymary1975]

I. Actually started talking to my daughter about the abortion topic when she was precisely 7 years old. I think that is a perfect age to start introducing the concept and you only need to keep in mind two things: at 7 a kid does not need to know details, you only need to introduce him to the general idea; and explain it in a language appropriate for 7 years. If you follow that it is not complicated to explain.

Most seven year old have seen a pregnant woman and have an idea that there is a baby. You can probably tell him that babies grow inside of their mommies and that when a baby is inside mommy the baby is alive, the baby just grows but can move, hear just like a regular baby but smaller (to introduce to the idea that there is live in there). I did show a picture to my daughter of a baby at 24 week and I told her that it was baby growing and her answer was oh it is a baby, and I said yes it us a baby he is just growing in the same way a kid grows to before becoming an adult. And then you can tell him that unfortunately sometimes babies get killed inside their mummies and it is very sad and thebcgurch is against it because it is the killing if a human being. That is it, you won’t have to go any further and again at 7 all they want is the general ideas so at long as you don’tbring any details, tthe kid won’t ask any further. Just plant the seed that the baby is alive and that we are against killing babies inside their moms because despite that we cannot see them they are alive. If he asks why some people killed them (leave it general to some…do not go to specific that mother kills the baby) say that is because we cannot see them some people think that they are not alive but that is wrong because the fact that you don’t see someone doesn’t mean they are not alive.

And probably for know that is all the explanation you need (that was how I first brought it to NY daughter). As he gets older and develops more understanding you can deepen the conversation. But I think is important to start developing these concepts around that age because if we wait until we think they can understand, probably by then the culture has reaches to them and given them their version…and then good luck trying to fight that.

 

[Corki]

Sometimes it is best to admit to a child that something is too complicated to explain right now, and will have to wait until they are a little older. You can say, “This is about helping to protect babies before they are born, while they are still growing inside their mothers. Other than that, it is complicated. I think we ought to wait to get into more details until you are older. Right now, just pray for all the mothers and their unborn babies, that they all stay safe and sound. We all need prayers.” You have to stick with it, though. “I’m sorry. I know you have a lot of questions. It is just that you’re going to have to wait a bit for answers. Sorry.”

This is an excellent response.

 

[savedbygrace71]

Why not skip the abortion part until he’s older?
There are special machines that show a very small baby growing in it’s mummy’s tummy. Isn’t that awesome? It’s like Superman with xray vision!

I see what you mean, except that he read the paragraph that said, march for life, rally against abortion and so on. So, if he only saw the picture I could easily say, it’s an ultrasound of a baby in his mother’s tummy- he saw them of his little brother- but it was the words that he read, which he didn’t understand.

 

[savedbygrace71]

Sometimes it is best to admit to a child that something is too complicated to explain right now, and will have to wait until they are a little older. You can say, “This is about helping to protect babies before they are born, while they are still growing inside their mothers. Other than that, it is complicated. I think we ought to wait to get into more details until you are older. Right now, just pray for all the mothers and their unborn babies, that they all stay safe and sound. We all need prayers.” You have to stick with it, though. “I’m sorry. I know you have a lot of questions. It is just that you’re going to have to wait a bit for answers. Sorry.”

Yes, this will suit him just right. I like what MaryMary said too, but my son is very Type A and sometimes anxious and the kind of thing that might upset him is the “killing” word, as accurate as it is.

 

[marymary1975]

Yes, this will suit him just right. I like what MaryMary said too, but my son is very Type A and sometimes anxious and the kind of thing that might upset him is the “killing” word, as accurate as it is.

Oh if he is too anxious and can get upset then yes you can tell them that is to protect babies growing up inside their babies and then as he is growing up you can deep the conversation. The point is to keep at his level of understanding and where is comfortable while raising awareness.

 

[MacQ]

Sometimes it is best to admit to a child that something is too complicated to explain right now, and will have to wait until they are a little older. You can say, “This is about helping to protect babies before they are born, while they are still growing inside their mothers. Other than that, it is complicated. I think we ought to wait to get into more details until you are older. Right now, just pray for all the mothers and their unborn babies, that they all stay safe and sound. We all need prayers.” You have to stick with it, though. “I’m sorry. I know you have a lot of questions. It is just that you’re going to have to wait a bit for answers. Sorry.”

I think this is an excellent response.

 

[Hoosier_Daddy]

My children have always kind of “known about abortion” Because we are active pro life Catholics and we actively pray for the unborn and for an end to abortion. We have attended marches but most importantly our parish is active and prays at Mass for an end to abortion. And since 7 year olds are preparing to become full on “members” of the faith with the sacraments I have no problem discussing this issue with my kids. My wife is currently pregnant with our 5th and even our four year old kind of knows what is going on.

Sadly we live in a world where abortion is rampant, and we live in a world where children’s prayers are powerful. As a family, be it the divine mercy chaplet or the rosary, we speak of and pray about abortion. In much the same way that we speak of and pray about the killing of God on the Cross. It is part of our faith, of our world.

 

[savedbygrace71]

My children have always kind of “known about abortion” Because we are active pro life Catholics and we actively pray for the unborn and for an end to abortion. We have attended marches but most importantly our parish is active and prays at Mass for an end to abortion. And since 7 year olds are preparing to become full on “members” of the faith with the sacraments I have no problem discussing this issue with my kids. My wife is currently pregnant with our 5th and even our four year old kind of knows what is going on.

Sadly we live in a world where abortion is rampant, and we live in a world where children’s prayers are powerful. As a family, be it the divine mercy chaplet or the rosary, we speak of and pray about abortion. In much the same way that we speak of and pray about the killing of God on the Cross. It is part of our faith, of our world.

I think this is important, I understand where you are coming from. I have prayer cards that say pray for unborn human life and so on around the house. He just hasn’t ever realized that it meant pray that they aren’t killed. I think for my son, when I tell him the whole story, he will suddenly realize that some mothers kill their babies and it will - rightly - shock him and sicken him into panic. I need to ease him into it. It is his sacramental year, he is going to be having First Holy Communion this year, you are right. It’s just hard for a momma to tell her baby some of the ugly truths.

 

[MacQ]

I think this is important, I understand where you are coming from. I have prayer cards that say pray for unborn human life and so on around the house. He just hasn’t ever realized that it meant pray that they aren’t killed. I think for my son, when I tell him the whole story, he will suddenly realize that some mothers kill their babies and it will - rightly - shock him and sicken him into panic. I need to ease him into it. It is his sacramental year, he is going to be having First Holy Communion this year, you are right. It’s just hard for a momma to tell her baby some of the ugly truths.

Indeed. I think a wise Momma phases things in. Praying for the babies not yet born is sufficient for now.

 

[Hoosier_Daddy]

I think this is important, I understand where you are coming from. I have prayer cards that say pray for unborn human life and so on around the house. He just hasn’t ever realized that it meant pray that they aren’t killed. I think for my son, when I tell him the whole story, he will suddenly realize that some mothers kill their babies and it will - rightly - shock him and sicken him into panic. I need to ease him into it. It is his sacramental year, he is going to be having First Holy Communion this year, you are right. It’s just hard for a momma to tell her baby some of the ugly truths.

Oh, It is definitely hard. And it is a personal parenting choice that can be different for each family. We homeschool with Catholic curriculum and there have been some pretty interesting moments in our conversations about the faith. But, I have found that at least with my own children sometimes they handle the ugly truths better than adults do. My kids never panicked or were shocked about it mainly because they see the family pray and fight so hard against bad things. We live in a world where kids will see footage of planes slamming into buildings, where there is a beheading or christian killed as we speak. And where war is seeming to be the mark of our time. We don’t live in the time of Nero. Or the Third Reich, but one can argue that we face an equally evil and violent time. And that is where Christ comes in. Remember that children died for their faith. And it was children who lived their faith and changed the world. Jose Sanchez del Rio was 14. Maria Garetti, was 11, Mary carried God in her teens hiding from persecution.

Here is a list of child saints. Those innocents who were martyred perhaps did not know the ugly Truths of life but many others did.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_child_saints

I am not saying one has to blatantly tell children shocking and grotesque things, but rather that sometimes we protect and hide the lamps that God intends to be out in the world.

That being said. I cannot imagine some of the things many Christian Children are facing in the middle east right now, and I would not expose my children to some of those images.

 

[Hoosier_Daddy]

Indeed. I think a wise Momma phases things in. Praying for the babies not yet born is sufficient for now.

Perhaps, until the question, “mommy what is abortion?” comes out of the mouth of the babes.

 

[Gordon_Sims]

This is one of those topics that we’d have waited to cover until our two older girls were a bit older but had the decision taken out of our hands when a family member gave them a pro-abortion sermon without our knowledge or permission. They were 7-8 years old at the time and we were pretty straightforward with them. They understood it and were pretty horrified that people would actually do something like that. It didn’t upset them to the point of nightmares or anything like that, but it made enough of an impression they are both now staunchly pro-life and are getting to the point where they can argue the topic pretty effectively.

 

[MacQ]

Perhaps, until the question, “mommy what is abortion?” comes out of the mouth of the babes.

Yes indeed. That’s what I meant by phasing.
One needn’t answer questions that have not yet been asked.
There is such a thing with little ones as TMI

 

[Gwendolen]

My children were introduced early to the fact that some expectant mothers don’t have everything they need to parent their babies, and as Christians it is our duty to provide extra help. We volunteered together at the crisis pregnancy center on the “give away day” handing out diapers, baby clothes, maternity clothes, etc. Eventually, the conversation of what happens when a woman is scared she cannot provide for her baby, and there is no one to help and comfort her flows more naturally, certainly by age 10, my kids had a solid understanding of what abortion was, and our Christian duty to respond.

 

[Hockeygurl]

Sometimes it is best to admit to a child that something is too complicated to explain right now, and will have to wait until they are a little older. You can say, “This is about helping to protect babies before they are born, while they are still growing inside their mothers. Other than that, it is complicated. I think we ought to wait to get into more details until you are older. Right now, just pray for all the mothers and their unborn babies, that they all stay safe and sound. We all need prayers.” You have to stick with it, though. “I’m sorry. I know you have a lot of questions. It is just that you’re going to have to wait a bit for answers. Sorry.”

I’m sorry, but I completely disagree. If the child is old enough to be asking these types of questions… they deserve to have some type of answer. I do agree with “sugar coating” the answer for the time being however. (age appropriate).

My biggest concern would be that if the child doesn’t get a satisfactory answer from you, they may go to friends or other adults for an answer and I would think that you would at least want to have some control over what information is given to your child