Explaining Sunday Mass Obligation To Non-Catholic Family

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Hi guys! So, I am currently going through the RCIA process. (Awesome parish, awesome priest, awesome sponsor, awesome director, SUPER excited!) and my boyfriend of 4 years (non-denominational Christian) and I, as well as my sister and a friend of hers, are planning on going on a weekend trip to a big theme park near us for our anniversary. We’re doing the planning now, for the trip in a few months. I will absolutely have to go to mass the Sunday we are there. I found a large parish 10 minutes away from the park with a mass early enough that I could go before anyone even woke up so it would not be an inconvenience for the rest of the group. However, I’m struggling with how to explain this to them effectively. My sister and boyfriend both know about my conversion and are supportive, but I don’t think they’ll fully understand the concept of me having an obligation as opposed to it not being a big deal to miss a Protestant church service now and again. How should I approach this with them so that they don’t try to tell me to just not go or something similar?
 
Just say you found a church nearby that you’ll be attending before the day’s activities. Really, I don’t think that you need to get into the idea of the obligation at all (which is not binding on you until you’re received into the Church anyway, though of course it’s good to go!) The fact that you want to and you took care to not interfere with planned activities should be enough. Don’t over think it. 😉

Welcome home!
 
pensmama87 said:
Just say you found a church nearby that you’ll be attending before the day’s activities. Really, I don’t think that you need to get into the idea of the obligation at all (which is not binding on you until you’re received into the Church anyway, though of course it’s good to go!) The fact that you want to and you took care to not interfere with planned activities should be enough. Don’t over think it. 😉

Welcome home!
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I’d try this approach first, as pensmama87 suggests. If, however, they want a further explanation, it’s really simple. Keeping the Lord’s Day holy is one of the Ten Commandments, and a commandment isn’t a mere suggestion. Those who are able to attend Mass are obligated because it is the command of God, not merely because "the Church says so, " which many seem to believe. 🙂 Although, as a catechumen you are not obligated to attend Mass. If you wished to attend any church to keep the Sabbath, it would okay. It’s always good for people of any Christian faith community to attend their own services, as well as Catholics attend the Mass.
 
You have to start with the concept that the eucharistic is the source and summit of our Christian life.
As such attending on Sunday is one of the things that the Church teaches us is a bare minimum to growing our relationship with God.

An analogy in my mind is the concept of fidelity in marriage. We all know that being faithful to our spouse is a bare minimum to growing our live for each other.
 
chloebelle said:
How should I approach this with them so that they don’t try to tell me to just not go or something similar?
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“I’m going to church, be back in an hour”.

I don’t think you need to explain anything. I always approach mass attendance as just what I do, who I am.

If anyone says anything about not going, I would just smile and say, “No. I’m going to church, be back in an hour… text me where you are and I’ll catch up to you.”

End of discussion.
 
Also, if you are in RCIA, you do not have a mass obligation.

You can act as if you do (and we should all certainly WANT to go to mass), but you are not yet a Catholic and therefore do not actually have a mass obligation.
 
Why is this even an issue? I assume that you are an adult. Does your sister typically tell you what to do or what not to do?
 
Its great you are becoming Catholic.
Given you are not married, have you discussed a trip away with your boyfriend, to your Priest, from the
’ how to remain / practise chastity ’ point of view?
 
Good start to living your faith, NOTHING is more important than God. We meet Him when we go to Mass. If anybody keeps you from Him, I would be concerned about that relationship.
 
Yeah, I don’t think you need to explain anything or make a big deal out of it. “I’m going to mass, I’ll be back in an hour. I’ll pick up some coffee and donuts on the way back.” No need to overthink it.
 
Yeah. Part of becoming Catholic is to not fear what the world thinks of you.
Or what you think that they about you. 😉

Trust God. He’s the only one you need to be concerned with.
You said they were friends. Why would they risk offending you over something that doesn’t concern them in the least?

You won’t even be in the same room, right? You won’t disturb anyone. 🤷
 
I’d simply tell your boyfriend that you are going to Mass on Saturday night or Sunday, and ask if he has any (name removed by moderator)ut. If he asks why you’re going, I would say, “Because I want to go to Mass at least every Sunday whenever it is possible. It is an obligation, but I’d still want to do it if it weren’t a duty. Since I’ve been doing that, I wondered how I ever willingly went a week without gathering for worship on Sunday. I would never want to go without that again.”

As for his (name removed by moderator)ut, I have heard (as an example) that although the former Crystal Cathedral is still being renovated to become the cathedral for the Diocese of Orange, the campus is well worth a visit. It may be that there is a “point of interest” Catholic church in the area you are visiting, and he’ll want to go with you.

If you aren’t going to feel entirely free to practice your faith, even on vacation, let your boyfriend go. Marriage to a non-Catholic only works if the full practice of your faith is a given. Do give your boyfriend credit by assuming that is exactly how he feels, until he gives you a reason to think otherwise. After all, if he kept kosher I am sure you might feel a little hurt if he was afraid you’d expect him to eat non-kosher foods on special occasions.
 
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