L
LoveToLive
Guest
I am hopefully in extreme physical pain for the last time. However the emotional pain added on to it makes it unbearable. I am about to loose my house due to no income for so long. My wife says she will leave me. I have a 13 and a 17 year old son. I could have been a better husband but the surgeon that started this mess 6 years ago by doing a procedure I would have never agreed to really did me in. My 13 year old needs me. I keep praying the rosary. I will see my doctor tomorrow so I go on something for anxiety. I am trying to follow God’s plan for me but I desperately want my life to end and desperately want to live. This life can have so much suffering. My neighbour’s son has (I think ALS or MS) and he is finally near death and in his thirties. He has been loosing the use of his body since he was 5 years old. I feel I have nothing to complain about but I am so alone. When I asked my sister for more of my Dad’s money she berated me and I insulted her in an email. I would hand out my own money in a second if it saved my sister from suffering. My Dad is 90 and he will pass on soon and leave us $800K each. So I’m okay financially. I don’t live in Yemen, I live in Canada. I feel terrible about asking for prayers. I am thinking of everyone else who is suffering. If you are, let me know and I can dedicate the next Rosary to you. When you think about it, imagine how many have gone before us and lived such horribly painful lives. So sad. My boys are healthy, smart, and very good, so I have nothing to complain about. Well, my wife never really liked me going to Church, so if I manage to stay alive through this, at least I can always go. I know we should all pray the Rosary. That comes up in every apparition. Materialism also comes up. I hope to see you in Heaven. I try to think of my 13 year old when thoughts of ending my life come up. My family has meant everything to me. Just 6 years where half the time the pain has been terrible. Not sleeping much. Jesus, please, some mercy.