Fast Annulment possible?

[elawlee]

Hi everyone,

Thank you for advance for reading. I feel like my situation is a bit unique and I could really use some guidance so I know what to expect. I was baptized as an infant in the Methodist church and was raised by going to the Methodist church with my mother (Methodist) and Catholic church with my father (Catholic). I was never confirmed in either religion.

I was married in 2004 in a non-denominational ceremony outside of a church and was divorced over 4 years ago. There were no children of that marriage as I wanted them and I believed that my husband at the time was not prepared.

I never thought I would get married again but I met a wonderful man over a year ago and we recently became engaged. He is a cradle Catholic and wants to be married in the church. I am planning on attending RCIA to convert. I start next week.

After all that babbling here is my question. I know annulments can be very lengthy for good reason. However I am turning 35 in a month and my fiance is 44. We desperately want at least 2-3 children. Due to my age and possible fertility issues we don’t want to wait more than a year to get married (I will be almost 36 by that time-yikes!!!).

In cases like this is there anyway the process can be sped up? I really would be upset if I had to wait until 37-38 to marry and thus have a very very small window to have the children we desire.

All feedback is welcome! We have a meeting at our church with the Deacon next week.

 

[1ke]

No, the process cannot be “sped up” and I do not really think you understand what a decree of nullity is and is not. I suggest the book Annulment: The Wedding That Was by Michael Smith Foster. And, of course, meeting with the deacon is very important.

Your marriage could very well be found valid, in which case you and your current fiance would not be able to marry at all. Do not make any wedding plans until you know whether or not you are free to marry.

 

[Qwestions]

Hi, elawlee. Welcome to CAF! The crucial question is: in what faith was the husband from whom you’re divorced baptized?

 

[CaptFun]

Can’t be THAT fast in the Catholic Church because:

Mattew 19:3 Some Pharisees approached him, and tested him, saying, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause whatever?”

4 He said in reply, "Have you not read that from the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female’

5 and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?

6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, no human being must separate."

It’s also why one can’t get married that quickly in the Catholic Church. It’s following Jesus’ teachings on the permanence and sanctity of Marriage makes His Church proceed carefully whether binding or loosing in a matter Jesus spoke so strongly on.

That said, an “annulment” sort of investigates whether it WAS GOD that joined the two people together in a sacrament … or whether something was lacking. Like the insincerity of one partner, some legal impediment (e.g. an existing marriage) etc.

This also allows the couple to reconcile or reconsider a possibly rash action (either going INTO the marriage or coming OUT of one possibly).

It can be hard on people I know. I am divorced (or was) and received an annulment after 1 year (1 year and a half after the spouse left as the church won’t begin the examination until a civil divorce is final).

I’m sure some abandoned spouses struggle with wanting someone else to fill the void of the broken relationship. And not even being able to begin to be engaged and such to another “good Catholic” until the annulment is final and a six month engagement (with pre Cana classes) are complete before the normalcy of marriage is replaced tempts many to cave into temptation or dislike the Church.

But self-control is holy too … and generally required as part of our getting through that narrow door into heaven. Not just in the area of sex of course. Those tempted badly to, let’s say violence, have got to make a change too.

 

[Fr_Michael_Grac]

This is not the kind of thing you can get advice upon from a web forum. It is a specialized field, the answer as to how long it will take varies widely depending on the circumstances. I am sure the specialist will give an estimation.

God bless.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

Hi everyone,

Thank you for advance for reading. I feel like my situation is a bit unique and I could really use some guidance so I know what to expect. I was baptized as an infant in the Methodist church and was raised by going to the Methodist church with my mother (Methodist) and Catholic church with my father (Catholic). I was never confirmed in either religion.

I was married in 2004 in a non-denominational ceremony outside of a church and was divorced over 4 years ago. There were no children of that marriage as I wanted them and I believed that my husband at the time was not prepared.

I never thought I would get married again but I met a wonderful man over a year ago and we recently became engaged. He is a cradle Catholic and wants to be married in the church. I am planning on attending RCIA to convert. I start next week.

After all that babbling here is my question. I know annulments can be very lengthy for good reason. However I am turning 35 in a month and my fiance is 44. We desperately want at least 2-3 children. Due to my age and possible fertility issues we don’t want to wait more than a year to get married (I will be almost 36 by that time-yikes!!!).

In cases like this is there anyway the process can be sped up? I really would be upset if I had to wait until 37-38 to marry and thus have a very very small window to have the children we desire.

All feedback is welcome! We have a meeting at our church with the Deacon next week.

Your fiance’ and you have gotten the cart before the horse, I am afraid. You both need to speak to a priest, go over your entire situation, and start the annulment process, knowing that there is some degree of chance that you will NOT be granted an annulment. You should not go forward with wedding plans at this point since you do not have any guarantee that the annulment will be granted.

But first things first. Go and talk to the priest, and get the process started. You will also have to go through pre-Cana classes (marriage prep). Your conversion is a good and wonderful thing but these other preparations are just as, if not more, important.

 

[Don_Jackson]

No, the process cannot be “sped up” and I do not really think you understand what a decree of nullity is and is not. I suggest the book Annulment: The Wedding That Was by Michael Smith Foster. And, of course, meeting with the deacon is very important.

Your marriage could very well be found valid, in which case you and your current fiance would not be able to marry at all. Do not make any wedding plans until you know whether or not you are free to marry.

The above poster’s first paragraph is reasonable advice.

However, please do not dispair over the remaining comments that are probably made with good intentions. Your marriage could just as well be found invalid. Talk to a priest. While manyat this website are well read and versed on Catholic law, few are qualified to apply it.

 

[ValPal]

In cases like this is there anyway the process can be sped up?

As others noted no. However, if you have a lack of form case, it can go very quickly. That case deals with at least one of the spouses being Catholic and being married outside of the Catholic Church without the appropriate dispensation.

Either way, start your case ASAP.

 

[joanofarc2008]

Prayers your way. Please do not despair. Some diocese will give priority to cases where one of the applicants is entering the Church. However, I believe you should really look at this process first and what lead to the breakdown of the marriage before discerning the next one. You may find it very helpful. I know my process has helped me in this way.