Finding forgiveness and is it enough?

[Andrea_Canada]

First, I don’t want to go through all the details of all the unfair things that have happened since I am sure ‘everyone has a sob story’ and could relate.

I do want to discuss how hard it is to forgive. I do believe that life is better when one finds forgiveness in their heart. However, I also think very often people just ‘forget about it’ than actually forgive and it creeps up in behaviour. Like angry outbursts for no reason.

Exactly how does one forgive? I have spent hours praying for people who have hurt me, begging God to put forgiveness in my heart. Yet I am still full of resentments. Which leads me to 2 conclusions

a-) I haven’t forgiven which is why I ask ‘how do you forgive’
or
b-) there has to be another step after forgiveness to bring peace into my heart

I really would like some practical advice or some fresh perspective. I don’t want bitterness in my heart, only joy

Andrea

 

[Vico]

First, I don’t want to go through all the details of all the unfair things that have happened since I am sure ‘everyone has a sob story’ and could relate.

I do want to discuss how hard it is to forgive. I do believe that life is better when one finds forgiveness in their heart. However, I also think very often people just ‘forget about it’ than actually forgive and it creeps up in behaviour. Like angry outbursts for no reason.

Exactly how does one forgive? I have spent hours praying for people who have hurt me, begging God to put forgiveness in my heart. Yet I am still full of resentments. Which leads me to 2 conclusions

a-) I haven’t forgiven which is why I ask ‘how do you forgive’
or
b-) there has to be another step after forgiveness to bring peace into my heart

I really would like some practical advice or some fresh perspective. I don’t want bitterness in my heart, only joy

Andrea

The forgiveness that each will receive from the Holy Trinity is conditional upon repentance from any mortal sins so it is essential to not hate but to love others to receive forgiveness. The heart is the soul, the core of a person, which is the will and intellect. But the feelings are not the same as the will, so feelings (emotions) can persist even though there is no ill will, and this is not sinful.

Luke 17

3 Take heed to yourselves. If thy brother sin against thee, reprove him: and if he do penance, forgive him. 4 And if he sin against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day be converted unto thee, saying, I repent; forgive him.

 

[Dorothy]

You don’t have to “feel” the forgiveness with emotions. Leave the person to the Lord to take care of him/her with His grace. We can’t control our feelings; they just come and go. But we can forgive with our will!

Every time the person you find hard to forgive comes up in your thoughts, just give that person to the Lord to grant the graces they need for their salvation.

Peace!

 

[Dan_Defender]

Forgiveness is a process. Take one day at a time. Ultimately, through prayer and meditation, one finds that forgiveness is consistent with the love of God and that forgiving will bring one inner peace. That is my experience.

 

[Angel_Bradford]

“…Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us…”

 

[Buks]

I have found that time is important. Perhaps it means I wasn’t forgiving enough. But time allowed some positive experiences with the person and to gradually see them in a better light.