First confession experience - share your stories

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Hi all,

Just wanted to start a thread in which those of us new to the Church could share our first confession stories.

I went to my first confession this past Saturday, a week after my baptism. I wanted to go while I had just a few venial sins to confess, so that my first run at it would not involve the confession of anything major, the bungling of which might leave me doubt about my worthiness to receive communion.

As a result, it was quite short. I confessed to our parish’s associate priest, a monk on loan to us from a Filipino order, so his English is heavily accented, and he speaks pretty quickly and in a low voice, so it was hard to understand him sometimes. I am fairly confident I understood his penance (basically, do one nice thing for a particular person), but am concerned about what, exactly, might satisfy this. I’d rather just have a 5 Hail Mary’s kind of thing – something that can be done without leaving any ambiguity. Afterward, I prayed that God might remove any deficiencies in my confession and penance.

Nonetheless, the priest was good, didn’t criticize or rush me, made sure that I understood that baptism erased guilt due to sins prior to my baptism and so that there was no need to confess them, and gave me some sound advice and counsel. And he was very friendly and seemed happy to see me there, given that I am new to the Church. Overall, a net-positive experience, although now I worry I might have a tendency toward scrupulosity. If that sort of worry happens again (“did I satisfy my penance?”) I may preface future confessions by telling the priest about it and asking for a penance that can be satisfied without such doubt, such as praying the rosary or reading certain Scripture passages, etc.

What are your stories? I’ve read on here before that some people coming into the Church on Easter Vigil were not adequately prepared for confession – did your first time go well? Any doubts left over? Were you nervous? Was your priest understanding? etc.

God bless,

sw85
 
sw85 said:
Hi all,

Just wanted to start a thread in which those of us new to the Church could share our first confession stories.

I went to my first confession this past Saturday, a week after my baptism. I wanted to go while I had just a few venial sins to confess, so that my first run at it would not involve the confession of anything major, the bungling of which might leave me doubt about my worthiness to receive communion.

As a result, it was quite short. I confessed to our parish’s associate priest, a monk on loan to us from a Filipino order, so his English is heavily accented, and he speaks pretty quickly and in a low voice, so it was hard to understand him sometimes. I am fairly confident I understood his penance (basically, do one nice thing for a particular person), but am concerned about what, exactly, might satisfy this. I’d rather just have a 5 Hail Mary’s kind of thing – something that can be done without leaving any ambiguity. Afterward, I prayed that God might remove any deficiencies in my confession and penance.

Nonetheless, the priest was good, didn’t criticize or rush me, made sure that I understood that baptism erased guilt due to sins prior to my baptism and so that there was no need to confess them, and gave me some sound advice and counsel. And he was very friendly and seemed happy to see me there, given that I am new to the Church. Overall, a net-positive experience, although now I worry I might have a tendency toward scrupulosity. If that sort of worry happens again (“did I satisfy my penance?”) I may preface future confessions by telling the priest about it and asking for a penance that can be satisfied without such doubt, such as praying the rosary or reading certain Scripture passages, etc.

What are your stories? I’ve read on here before that some people coming into the Church on Easter Vigil were not adequately prepared for confession – did your first time go well? Any doubts left over? Were you nervous? Was your priest understanding? etc.

God bless,

sw85
Click to expand...
My first confession was shortly before Easter vigil 2002, I was nervous, but according to the priest at the time I did okay. As penance he would always give me to read and meditate on whatever the Gospel reading would be that following Sunday. Other priests give me to pray a Hail Mary and an Our Father. Our first priest understood that I was formerly an evangelical and devoted to reading Scripture so he used that as penance.
 
HI SW

People can sometimes be scrupulous about using the word scrupulosity (pun intended :D), so it might better be said that you are worrying unnecessarily or a bit overanxious. Nonetheless, I think yours is a good idea to request a more concrete penance in the future, at least for a while, until you are a little more comfortable with the whole process.

God bless and welcome, again.

.
 
i had to sit infront of the priest and it was awkard (age 11) , to look at him while im telling him my sins

and as a kid when i was in an awkard situation i would laugh so it was almost like i wasn’t scincere…

now I always do anonymous confession!
 
My first confession, but first some background:

After several years of study I converted to Catholicism many, many years ago. I was finally baptised and confirmed, but fell away from The Church soon after. I had never gone to confession.

I was away from The Church for 30 years. During that time I lived a very sinful life. Things I cannot go into here, but I hurt many people. I knew this wasn’t going to be a 5 minute confession.

I called the priest and made an appointment. I told him how long it had been and that it would be my first confession.

I spent many hours examining my conscience. I went through each of the 10 commandments and listed everything I could think of on a piece of paper. Hard to remember everything, but it was a very long list anyway.

I asked Father if I could bring the list. I wanted to make a good confession, but I felt bad because I knew it was going to take a lot of his time. I apologised for that, but he told me not to worry.

He was so kind. He explained everything. What I should do, how I should make my confession and how to say things. I chose a face to face confession. I did not feel I deserved annonimity. It was painful to admit to God and myself what an awful person I had been. We actually talked quite a bit. He even spoke of his own life and struggles—probably inappropriate in the confessional, but, I don’t think it was the usual situation. He spoke of forgiveness, and reiterated several times that the weight of that sin was removed and I should not carry it around any longer. It took 1 1/2 hours.

It was one of the most important events of my life. I believe that when I emptied my heart of all that ugliness and pain I left it open to the fulness of God’s grace. I know I was fortunate to have had such kind and understanding confessor.

For my penance he told me to reflect on the mercy of God and give thanks.
I like the idea of doing something nice for someone as a form of penance though. Sometimes even the small things have a huge impact on someone.

These days confession is pretty drab by comparison, but, I like it that way.
 
My very first confession was done when I was 7 years old and I can honestly say I have no idea what I said. Probably something along the lines of disobeying my parents and fighting with my brothers and sisters.
But my first confession when I returned to the Church after being gone for about 35 years was quite an experience, and one I’ll NEVER forget. Very emotional - the priest actually said, in a rather loud voice, “welcome home!” when I said how long it had been since my last confession. And I told him I was unsure of how exactly to proceed. He walked me through it so gently, it made me cry. And the only thing he said in response to each of the (many) sins I listed was, “and we’ll ask God’s forgiveness for that”, never changing his tone at all. It was scary and wonderful and terrifying and awesome all at the same time. Such a roller coaster of emotions, I’m surprised I didn’t have a cardiac event while I was in the confessional. 😃
But now that I’ve been back for several years, and have gone to confession so many times, I think I’m finally over my childhood fears of confession. When I was a kid the priests seemed much harsher, and the penances were much bigger. It felt more about judgment and punishment than forgiveness and mercy. Thank God that’s changed.
Oh yeah, one more thing… welcome home!!!
 
sw85 said:
Hi all,

Just wanted to start a thread in which those of us new to the Church could share our first confession stories.

I went to my first confession this past Saturday, a week after my baptism. I wanted to go while I had just a few venial sins to confess, so that my first run at it would not involve the confession of anything major, the bungling of which might leave me doubt about my worthiness to receive communion.

As a result, it was quite short. I confessed to our parish’s associate priest, a monk on loan to us from a Filipino order, so his English is heavily accented, and he speaks pretty quickly and in a low voice, so it was hard to understand him sometimes. I am fairly confident I understood his penance (basically, do one nice thing for a particular person), but am concerned about what, exactly, might satisfy this. I’d rather just have a 5 Hail Mary’s kind of thing – something that can be done without leaving any ambiguity. Afterward, I prayed that God might remove any deficiencies in my confession and penance.

Nonetheless, the priest was good, didn’t criticize or rush me, made sure that I understood that baptism erased guilt due to sins prior to my baptism and so that there was no need to confess them, and gave me some sound advice and counsel. And he was very friendly and seemed happy to see me there, given that I am new to the Church. Overall, a net-positive experience, although now I worry I might have a tendency toward scrupulosity. If that sort of worry happens again (“did I satisfy my penance?”) I may preface future confessions by telling the priest about it and asking for a penance that can be satisfied without such doubt, such as praying the rosary or reading certain Scripture passages, etc.

What are your stories? I’ve read on here before that some people coming into the Church on Easter Vigil were not adequately prepared for confession – did your first time go well? Any doubts left over? Were you nervous? Was your priest understanding? etc.

God bless,

sw85
Click to expand...
I entered into the Catholic church at the Easter Vigil, 2012, as well. I did my first confession on… I want to say this past Saturday. It was right before the mass, so there was a line and I am not sure how long it usually takes for a confession but it seems the people before me were in for quite a bit longer than me.

So, I waited in line, thinking about my sins, (I am pretty sure they were all venial.) with a guide to confession paper from the information rack in the back of the church. I waited, read the examination of conscience and marked the sins I may have committed to help me remember and read through how to go to confession. It said that after I confess my sins I would get may advice and a penence.

I went into the confessional, it was a room with a curtain with the priest on the other side of it, you could see his legs as you walked in, but not his face. I knelt down, did my sign of the cross, said it was my first confession and began confessing my sins and he would say something like ‘hm,’ or ‘oh.’ after some. I was hoping for some advice on how to overcome some of these vices, admonishments, something, but he went on and gave me the penence of praying to God that I could overcome these problems. I got absolution and left kind of dismayed. (if that is the right word…)

I guess I expected something different. It was so easy, and I loved that. Such simple words and God forgives your guilt and absolves your sins.

But then again it was like,
‘What, no flogging for penence? Maybe flogging is what I need.’
 
SusansChoice said:
My first confession, but first some background:

After several years of study I converted to Catholicism many, many years ago. I was finally baptised and confirmed, but fell away from The Church soon after. I had never gone to confession.

I was away from The Church for 30 years. During that time I lived a very sinful life. Things I cannot go into here, but I hurt many people. I knew this wasn’t going to be a 5 minute confession.

I called the priest and made an appointment. I told him how long it had been and that it would be my first confession.

I spent many hours examining my conscience. I went through each of the 10 commandments and listed everything I could think of on a piece of paper. Hard to remember everything, but it was a very long list anyway.

I asked Father if I could bring the list. I wanted to make a good confession, but I felt bad because I knew it was going to take a lot of his time. I apologised for that, but he told me not to worry.

He was so kind. He explained everything. What I should do, how I should make my confession and how to say things. I chose a face to face confession. I did not feel I deserved annonimity. It was painful to admit to God and myself what an awful person I had been. We actually talked quite a bit. He even spoke of his own life and struggles—probably inappropriate in the confessional, but, I don’t think it was the usual situation. He spoke of forgiveness, and reiterated several times that the weight of that sin was removed and I should not carry it around any longer. It took 1 1/2 hours.

It was one of the most important events of my life. I believe that when I emptied my heart of all that ugliness and pain I left it open to the fulness of God’s grace. I know I was fortunate to have had such kind and understanding confessor.

For my penance he told me to reflect on the mercy of God and give thanks.
I like the idea of doing something nice for someone as a form of penance though. Sometimes even the small things have a huge impact on someone.

These days confession is pretty drab by comparison, but, I like it that way.
Click to expand...
I love stories of God’s goodness and mercy, such as this. I am glad you are sticking with it, now.
 
I had my first Confession face to face at age 10. It was in a private room, and each person in my catechism class went to the priest (about 12 of us at most) - our families & catechist did not receive the sacrament that day but its been too long for me to remember. With kids its a bit different compared to an adult’s experience as the priest did not try to intimidate us kids. Then when we were done, each of us kids went to light a candle in the church in a section setup for our class.

After it was done, our catechist allowed us to leave with our respective families. I remember getting my certificate too. Also, I think my parents and my sister and I went out to eat to celebrate in a way too.

My mother grew in the pre Vatican II era where it was in the confessional booth thing and that you had to have received your First Confession before First Communion. She was 7 or 8, and remembers her mother sometimes telling her and her sister ‘you have been bad enough, you need to go to Confession’. Good thing the church was a few blocks away at the time.
 
I had my first confession a few days before Easter Vigil, 2012. We were very well instructed and prepared in our RICA class, which helped a lot. We were also given a pamphlet that explains examining the conscious. I spent several prayerful hours determining what I needed to confess. I felt like I needed to examine my life since the time of my baptism at age 14, and I’m now 43. As a protestant I was always taught that you simply confessed your sins to Jesus and they were forgiven, but it was something I struggled with a lot…you know, really “knowing” that your sins were forgiven. Because of that, I wanted to make sure that I was making a good confession, I wanted to “know” I was forgiven before confirmation.
The night that we went we had several priests in our church to hear confessions. I deliberately chose one that was not my priest. I was afraid I would feel awkward and embarrassed, and doing this for the first time was difficult enough!
I stood in line for about 30 minutes. I had my list of sins to confess, and my paper instructing me on the proper form. (Father had told us that we could bring these things with us to help.)
When my turn came I went into a room and some how didn’t even see the little wall and kneeler on the side of the Priest. (my husband told me about it afterwards!) I saw the chair across from the Priest and sat down. I told him it was my first confession and he helped me though it all. I found reciting my sins to be difficult, at best, but when I was done the Priest made a point of telling me that when God forgives us He also forgets our sins, and never remembers them again.
For penance he told me to pray the Our Father, and to spend some time thanking God for all of the things He has done in my life. I left the confessional feeling relief, and went into the church and knelt down to do as the priest had instructed. About halfway through thanking God I began to feel the most incredible peace and joy! I realized that I really was well and truly forgiven, and it was like having a burden lifted. I don’t think I ever realized how much guilt I was carrying around. It was a profound experience, life-changing, and I have come out of it totally convinced of the power of the sacrament!
I’m also glad that I ended up doing it face to face. It made everything very, very real, and I will continue to confess this way.
 
Gracegirl said:
I had my first confession a few days before Easter Vigil, 2012. We were very well instructed and prepared in our RICA class, which helped a lot. We were also given a pamphlet that explains examining the conscious. I spent several prayerful hours determining what I needed to confess. I felt like I needed to examine my life since the time of my baptism at age 14, and I’m now 43. As a protestant I was always taught that you simply confessed your sins to Jesus and they were forgiven, but it was something I struggled with a lot…you know, really “knowing” that your sins were forgiven. Because of that, I wanted to make sure that I was making a good confession, I wanted to “know” I was forgiven before confirmation.
The night that we went we had several priests in our church to hear confessions. I deliberately chose one that was not my priest. I was afraid I would feel awkward and embarrassed, and doing this for the first time was difficult enough!
I stood in line for about 30 minutes. I had my list of sins to confess, and my paper instructing me on the proper form. (Father had told us that we could bring these things with us to help.)
When my turn came I went into a room and some how didn’t even see the little wall and kneeler on the side of the Priest. (my husband told me about it afterwards!) I saw the chair across from the Priest and sat down. I told him it was my first confession and he helped me though it all. I found reciting my sins to be difficult, at best, but when I was done the Priest made a point of telling me that when God forgives us He also forgets our sins, and never remembers them again.
For penance he told me to pray the Our Father, and to spend some time thanking God for all of the things He has done in my life. I left the confessional feeling relief, and went into the church and knelt down to do as the priest had instructed. About halfway through thanking God I began to feel the most incredible peace and joy! I realized that I really was well and truly forgiven, and it was like having a burden lifted. I don’t think I ever realized how much guilt I was carrying around. It was a profound experience, life-changing, and I have come out of it totally convinced of the power of the sacrament!
I’m also glad that I ended up doing it face to face. It made everything very, very real, and I will continue to confess this way.
Click to expand...
Every time I have ever gone to confession I have always done it face to face. I would feel weird doing it from behind a screen!🤷
 
Jacob18 said:
I entered into the Catholic church at the Easter Vigil, 2012, as well. I did my first confession on… I want to say this past Saturday. It was right before the mass, so there was a line and I am not sure how long it usually takes for a confession but it seems the people before me were in for quite a bit longer than me.

So, I waited in line, thinking about my sins, (I am pretty sure they were all venial.) with a guide to confession paper from the information rack in the back of the church. I waited, read the examination of conscience and marked the sins I may have committed to help me remember and read through how to go to confession. It said that after I confess my sins I would get may advice and a penence.

I went into the confessional, it was a room with a curtain with the priest on the other side of it, you could see his legs as you walked in, but not his face. I knelt down, did my sign of the cross, said it was my first confession and began confessing my sins and he would say something like ‘hm,’ or ‘oh.’ after some. I was hoping for some advice on how to overcome some of these vices, admonishments, something, but he went on and gave me the penence of praying to God that I could overcome these problems. I got absolution and left kind of dismayed. (if that is the right word…)

I guess I expected something different. It was so easy, and I loved that. Such simple words and God forgives your guilt and absolves your sins.

But then again it was like,
‘What, no flogging for penence? Maybe flogging is what I need.’
Click to expand...
Maybe because it was your first confession, the priest couldn’t necessarily presume a pattern of sinning and therefore was unable to advise you at this point. If you can make this priest your regular confessor, that might help. But welcome home - you’ve been missed! 😃
 
My first confession was terrifying…and the second and the third.
I came into the church this Easter 2012. I was out of town the week before so I missed a couple RICA classes in prepration.
I was ill prepared, yet totally willing to enter confession.
There were a couple priests there so we had a choice who we could go to. I chose the room with our parish priest.
It was a long wait which did nothing to ease my nerves. It did everything to allow me to meditate and think of all I’ve done in my 49 years which I had to confess…

My turn finally came…

I entered the room and felt totally abandoned. I had not expected a room where nobody was present, but a kneeler, a chair and a crusifix on the wall. I knew the priest was on the other side of a curtein, but I did not know then that I could go around ant talk face to face.
I felt abandoned, yet not alone either.
The priest had to initiatie the conversation as I suddenly had no voice. I was overwhelmed.
I mentally went over everything again and started to vocalize my sins, but the only thing that would come out was a sob. I could only say ‘everything’
I’m not sure the priest heard me, but I know God did.
The priest asked if nothing comes to mind at this moment… then gave me absolution.

I went back into the sancuary and gave myself 2 our father’s and 3 hail mary’s.
During this prayer, a peace came over me and I knew that I had just made my first confession and that I was forgiven…but I had not forgiven myself.
I went to the main classroom where we usually met and greeted my sponsor. She and her husband had to leave but I wanted to stay a bit.

I went in and picked myself up by the bootstraps. The first priest had already left the room he was in so I went to the other who was still there. I explained what had happened, but had to be more specific on one thing. He listeded, gave me advice, then absolution and a pennance. It was so beautiful.

I made my third confession this past Friday. I told the Father what had happened and that I am still so clumsy at this. He is so loving and understanding. I’m to do yet another pennance for my confession which is something I intended to do anyway. I guess God has taken care of the protestant for so long that he knows I still need the close guidance through the Baptism and gides me to do the right thing when I recognize my sin. I do know one thing, It is much more healing, more immediate and purifying to confess to the Priest / Jesus in person.

I’m on the right path, though I still stop and stare at the pebbles in the sand now and again, it is the correct path and I am Home. I have not felt as at peace since I was a wee child.
 
My first confession was in the 1950s , but I remember it well .

There were two confessors , the parish priest and the curate .

We were terrified of the parish priest . He was not a very nice man .

Each of us hoped that we would confess to the curate when it became our turn .

We had been told how the priest would not be able to see us , and I ended up with the parish priest . To my horror I entered the confessional and there was this face of the man right up to the grill looking at me .

We had been taught how to confess our sins , but the priest in a gentle way said that he was going to mention a few things and if I had done any of them I was just to nod my head as he went through the list .

So my fears were groundless , and the confession went along fine .

If only that priest could always have acted in such a kind way the life in the parish would have been so much better .

To give you some idea of the man , at one time he had eleven different curates within a two-year period . They all requested the bishop for a move because they found it so intolerable living with him and working under him .
 
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