First confession in 15+ years

[limabeanerson]

Sorry if there are other threads like this, I could not find them with a search.

I have not gone to confession since 7th or 8th grade. I’m going to be 30 this year so however many years that’s been.

I really don’t know what to expect. I’m planning on going tomorrow. I don’t remember how its supposed to go or what really I’m supposed to do.

Currently I’m assuming I just show up at the church during the scheduled time, go into the confessional when its my turn and just explain how long its been and kind of wing it from there, following his lead.

Do any of you have any advice? What should I expect? If pressed to think of every sin in the last 15 years I’m sure it would be very lengthy confession, what if I forget some?

Also, After this initial confession, am I supposed to go weekly or only when I have committed a mortal sin or what?

Thanks for any insight!

 

[Trishie]

Wonderful that you have the courage to go to Confession after 15 years even with all your questions and concerns. I’m delighted for you!

Your priest will help you along, especially knowing it has been a long time since you went to Confession.

You can only do your best to remember all that it is possible to remember. Ask the Holy Spirit to guide and to remind you of anything God wishes you to receive absolution for.
The priest has heard about every sin and probably many times over so don’t be nervous.

You can go to Confession as often as you choose, but the Church, as I recall, recommends once a month, except if you do have a mortal sin you need to confess.

 

[MikeDunphy]

I have not gone to confession since 7th or 8th grade. I’m going to be 30 this year so however many years that’s been.

I really don’t know what to expect. I’m planning on going tomorrow. I don’t remember how its supposed to go or what really I’m supposed to do.

Currently I’m assuming I just show up at the church during the scheduled time, go into the confessional when its my turn and just explain how long its been and kind of wing it from there, following his lead.

Awesome. Go to confession tomorrow with contrition for your sins and desire to get right with God, and your plan is a good one. Definitely tell the priest that after all these years you don’t remember how it’s supposed to go, so that he’ll talk you through your part.

Tell what you remember, and if you inadvertently forget a sin, it is forgiven, too. (Deliberately omitting serious sins is itself a serious sin, but I don’t think you would do that). I don’t really know, but the priest might want sort of an executive summary rather than a detailed listing of every sin.

Also, After this initial confession, am I supposed to go weekly or only when I have committed a mortal sin or what?

I think we could all benefit from weekly confession. Even if you are not guilty of mortal sin, there is sure to be some venial sin or imperfection you could work on.

 

[JMJ_coder]

Sorry if there are other threads like this, I could not find them with a search.

I have not gone to confession since 7th or 8th grade. I’m going to be 30 this year so however many years that’s been.

I really don’t know what to expect. I’m planning on going tomorrow. I don’t remember how its supposed to go or what really I’m supposed to do.

Currently I’m assuming I just show up at the church during the scheduled time, go into the confessional when its my turn and just explain how long its been and kind of wing it from there, following his lead.

Do any of you have any advice? What should I expect? If pressed to think of every sin in the last 15 years I’m sure it would be very lengthy confession, what if I forget some?

Also, After this initial confession, am I supposed to go weekly or only when I have committed a mortal sin or what?

Thanks for any insight!

Before you walk into the Confessional, perhaps sitting in a pew or while waiting in line, say a prayer to God that the Holy Spirit will illuminate your conscience that you might make a good Confession.

When you first walk into the Confessional, the Priest will greet you and possibly say a short prayer. Then, you say:** “Bless me Father for I have sinned. It has been X years since my last Confession”. ** You should mention to the Priest that you are uncertain of how to proceed from there and he will take you through an examination of conscience to help you make a good confession. He will then give you some form of penance to do (e.g., say 6 Hail Mary’s) and then will invite your Act of Contrition. You may print this out to help you: ewtn.com/devotionals/prayers/contrit.htm. Then he will give you Absolution and your sins will be forgiven you. THANKS BE TO GOD!!!

If you honestly forget a sin, don’t sweat it – they’re covered, too. You’ve made a good faith effort and you opened your soul without reservation – that’s what God’s asking for (and hey, He already knows it so you might as well admit it). And don’t be worried about the Priest, he’s heard it all before – he won’t be shocked by anything (trust me on that one).

After you’ve been absolved, canonically you’re only required to go to Confession once a year. But, almost all of us find inestimable benefit from more frequent reception of the Sacrament. And especially since you’ve been away from the faith for so many years, it would be helpful as your conscience is more and more aligned and formed in the Catholic faith and as you grow in spiritual maturity to make frequent Confessions. I’d recommend at least once a month, but no more than once a week without a spiritual director – unless you’ve committed a mortal sin and then go ASAP.

Good luck, and God’s grace be with you.

 

[VetA]

Sorry if there are other threads like this, I could not find them with a search.

I have not gone to confession since 7th or 8th grade. I’m going to be 30 this year so however many years that’s been.

I really don’t know what to expect. I’m planning on going tomorrow. I don’t remember how its supposed to go or what really I’m supposed to do.

Currently I’m assuming I just show up at the church during the scheduled time, go into the confessional when its my turn and just explain how long its been and kind of wing it from there, following his lead.

Do any of you have any advice? What should I expect? If pressed to think of every sin in the last 15 years I’m sure it would be very lengthy confession, what if I forget some?

Also, After this initial confession, am I supposed to go weekly or only when I have committed a mortal sin or what?

Thanks for any insight!

1)Go in, kneel. do sign of cross
2)Say "bless me Father, for I have sinned, it has been 15 years since my last confession and since that time I accuse myself of…[list [COLOR=“Red”]ALL of the sins that you can remembr, preferbly with the number of times you have commited them] I am heartly sorry for these sins and those that have escaped my memory
3)Priest will then give some advise and ask for you to say the act of contrition: “O my God,
I am heartily sorry for
having offended Thee,
and I detest all my sins,
because I dread the loss of heaven,
and the pains of hell;
but most of all because
they offend Thee, my God,
Who are all good and
deserving of all my love.
I firmly resolve,
with the help of Thy grace,
to confess my sins,
to do penance,
and to amend my life.
Amen.”
4) priest will absolve you

confession is required once a year, but it is recommended once a month. also note however to recieve communion while in a state of mortal sin is a mortal sin in and of itself, so if you are in a state of mortal sin it is the best thing to go right away.

i try to go to confession once a week. it keeps one humble and helps you keep account of what causes you to sin.

 

[Mike_SFO_1]

I was away from the church for about 20 years and I know exactly what you are feeling. Remember whatever you tell father he has heard many times before. There was only one original sin and that was committed by Adam.

When I received the words of absolution that first time it was an amazing feeling to me. It was as if so many years of sin were lifted off me. It is a very powerful experience. I will pray for you my friend that God touches you and starts a fire in your heart that never ends.

Pax at Bonum,

Mike

 

[Lamafacaja]

Oh, I’m happy for you! Stay firm in your decision to go today. Don’t tell yourself, “Oh, well I’ll go next week.” Sometimes when people do that, they end up putting off Confession for a very long time.
All those years since you’ve been, that’s a lot! You’ll really make the priests day!

 

[limabeanerson]

Thank you all for the great information!

I just went to my first confession!!!

I’m not sure I would have actually gone with out all of your words of encouragement and useful information!

Other than being nervous before hand it was pretty much painless. I’m sure I left out a bunch of sins but the priest said that was ok to!

I’d highly encourage everyone that has not gone in a long time to go!

Thanks again!

 

[jmcrae]

Thank you all for the great information!

I just went to my first confession!!!

I’m not sure I would have actually gone with out all of your words of encouragement and useful information!

Other than being nervous before hand it was pretty much painless. I’m sure I left out a bunch of sins but the priest said that was ok to!

I’d highly encourage everyone that has not gone in a long time to go!

Thanks again!

That’s such wonderful news!! Welcome back!

 

[graceandglory]

Sorry if there are other threads like this, I could not find them with a search.

I have not gone to confession since 7th or 8th grade. I’m going to be 30 this year so however many years that’s been.

I really don’t know what to expect. I’m planning on going tomorrow. I don’t remember how its supposed to go or what really I’m supposed to do.

Currently I’m assuming I just show up at the church during the scheduled time, go into the confessional when its my turn and just explain how long its been and kind of wing it from there, following his lead.

Do any of you have any advice? What should I expect? If pressed to think of every sin in the last 15 years I’m sure it would be very lengthy confession, what if I forget some?

Also, After this initial confession, am I supposed to go weekly or only when I have committed a mortal sin or what?

Thanks for any insight!

Congratulations on going back to Confession! It is so healing and cleansing, I say I feel like Rocky coming out of Confession!
I’m sure you’ve already gone by now, but I will respond anyway, since I love the Sacrament of Confession! Okay, let’s say it’s a Love/Hate relationship…I love the IDEA of Confession, I really dislike saying my sins.
But there is power in the confessional!

By all means, DON’T wing it! you won’t get much out of it, although you will still be forgiven! Google search for an “Examination of Conscience” before you go, and either check it off, write them down, or make a really good mental note of what you want to confess before going in. Then BE SURE to DESTROY the evidence! There is nothing Satan likes more than to bring up all our past sins to remind us.

Examination of Conscience
scborromeo.org/confess.htm

 

[limabeanerson]

Congratulations on going back to Confession! It is so healing and cleansing, I say I feel like Rocky coming out of Confession!
I’m sure you’ve already gone by now, but I will respond anyway, since I love the Sacrament of Confession! Okay, let’s say it’s a Love/Hate relationship…I love the IDEA of Confession, I really dislike saying my sins.
But there is power in the confessional!

By all means, DON’T wing it! you won’t get much out of it, although you will still be forgiven! Google search for an “Examination of Conscience” before you go, and either check it off, write them down, or make a really good mental note of what you want to confess before going in. Then BE SURE to DESTROY the evidence! There is nothing Satan likes more than to bring up all our past sins to remind us.

Examination of Conscience
scborromeo.org/confess.htm

Yeah, I’ve already gone and I did kind of wing it. I saw many of the comments here with some great reading and I was tempted to put off going to confession until I read everything so I could make a great confession. After reading another comment here I realized that I would always have an excuse to not go. I’ll make a more perfect confession next time, but I NEEDED to get this first one done ASAP. I had a lot of mortal sins and was quite uncomfortable living with that now that I know the consistences. I’m glad I did it today, even if it wasn’t the best confession ever.

I’ll be sure to do a full examination of conscience before next time!

 

[RoryMcKenzie56]

Thank you all for the great information!

I just went to my first confession!!!

I’m not sure I would have actually gone with out all of your words of encouragement and useful information!

Other than being nervous before hand it was pretty much painless. I’m sure I left out a bunch of sins but the priest said that was ok to!

I’d highly encourage everyone that has not gone in a long time to go!

Thanks again!

Hey limabean,

I’m real happy for you. I try to go once a month and it ends up being two months, but I am sure I go at least eight or ten times a year, and that nervousness is still there for me. I am usually relieved though afterwards. I’ll bet you are too.

 

[jmcrae]

Yeah, I’ve already gone and I did kind of wing it. I saw many of the comments here with some great reading and I was tempted to put off going to confession until I read everything so I could make a great confession. After reading another comment here I realized that I would always have an excuse to not go. I’ll make a more perfect confession next time, but I NEEDED to get this first one done ASAP. I had a lot of mortal sins and was quite uncomfortable living with that now that I know the consistences. I’m glad I did it today, even if it wasn’t the best confession ever.

I’ll be sure to do a full examination of conscience before next time!

I think it was G. K. Chesterton who once said that, the more important a thing is to do, the more important it is to do it badly, rather than not at all.

As you no doubt are already aware, Confession is one of those things that you can actually do quite badly (as long as it’s your very best), without actually failing at it - the sincere attempt is just as good as perfection, in this case.

And, as you’ve pointed out, you can always go back and mention anything that comes into your mind later on, that was forgotten.

 

[Sirach2]

One of the greatest blessings I received was in the hospital facing a serious surgery the next morning. I had not been to confession in my early adult years, and to my surprise, a priest entered my room and asked whether I would like to confess. When I welcomed him, he asked me simply, “Are you sorry for all the sins of your life?” I said yes, and then he absolved me! How simple! If this is how Our Lord brings his strays back when they are in the dangers of a surgical procedure, it is so wonderful. I went under anesthesia with absolute peace, and had the joy of being restored and forgiven. What a blessing.

I’m sure you already are basking in the delight of a “Child of God!” Welcome back!

 

[Edward_H]

Awesome limabeanerson,

What a wonderful story to read tonight. Well done. Holy courage!!

The rejoicing you see in this forum is tremendous, but in heaven there was was so much more!

in your own quiet way bring others back to this “Sacrament of Joy”.

Wonderful. Thanks for sharing.

 

[WFS5801]

Also, After this initial confession, am I supposed to go weekly or only when I have committed a mortal sin or what?

Thanks for any insight!

When I converted to Catholicism there was the possibility that I had been baptized validly in my Protestant church. So I was baptized conditionally – but, since my original baptism may have been valid, I had a general confession first, covering from my early teens to about age 40. So I kind of know what you’re going through.

Try to find a list of sins – and try to estimate how many times over the years you’ve committed each particular one. Don’t be afraid to use a pen and paper in this step. The priest I went to didn’t mind estimates… about so many times in my life… over so many times… so many times a month, etc. Most importantly, pray to the Holy Spirit to 1) Know your sins and 2) Feel true contrition for them. I usually say a prayer to our Lady that she pray for me that I might have the grace to make a good prayer to the Holy Spirit. (Sounds kind of odd but it makes sense.)

Confession is like going to a dentist. You don’t necessarily want to do it, but like getting a cavity fixed, once you’ve made a good confession you feel so good you wonder why you waited so long.

May God be with you.

 

[BusterMartin]

Congratulations!..and please keep going as frequently as is right for you (but at least once a year). I have never been the best at going to confession, but recently I have found a new love for that sacrament, and I hope you will grow in its graces as well! God bless!

 

[OraLabora]

I promise you will literally float out of the confessional on angels’ wings.

It was 22 years for me (lapsed Catholic), and that happened 13 years ago. I confessed what I remembered, told him it had been 22 years, and got a “welcome home, don’t wait so long next time” said with a

I took his advice and continue to make frequent use of the sacrament since then.

Few things in life can feel as liberating. We think we are “free” by doing “what we want” but in fact that just entraps us in sin. Confession breaks us free of the trap, and teaches us what true freedom is.