First time dads

[CatholicSamurai]

You might be right there. She may not understand herself. I’ll put that into great consideration.

My wife’s been feeling tired a lot lately though. I guess this could qualify as a new thread. I was wondering if this is normal.

 

[Uncle_David]

When my wife and I found out, I was too excited. I’ve always loved kids and my dream above all dreams was to be a Dad!
I wanted a bunch (being from a family with six kids) my wife wanted two (she has only one sister). While going through our marriage preparation the topic came up again. I wanted at least four - she still wanted two so I asked if she would compromise with three. She said no one child per parent was her ideal way. I told her God would get her for that. David Jr is now eleven and Holly and Hailey are nine

There is no better feeling than holding your little one and have them look up at you and smile! then say “I love you Daddy”.

 

[CatholicSam]

My wife’s been feeling tired a lot lately though. I guess this could qualify as a new thread. I was wondering if this is normal.

:yup: But don’t worry, many moms find that the fatigue lessens in the 2nd trimester. Why not surprise your wife with a book on pregnancy and what is/isn’t normal? I would have found that to be a very thoughtful gift!

During my first pregnancy, each week my husband would read a chapter out of our pregnancy book while I was on the couch with my feet propped up. It was neat learning these things together.

 

[Uncle_David]

:yup: But don’t worry, many moms find that the fatigue lessens in the 2nd trimester. Why not surprise your wife with a book on pregnancy and what is/isn’t normal? I would have found that to be a very thoughtful gift!

During my first pregnancy, each week my husband would read a chapter out of our pregnancy book while I was on the couch with my feet propped up. It was neat learning these things together.

or just wing it! Just kidding! My wife had a number of books about pregnancy and motherhood. They were very helpful to her. She wasn’t exposed to little ones until we started dating. I already had several nieces and nephews that I watched and played with on a regular basis. Plus I watched my siblings raise their little ones. Good learning experience!

One thing I swore I’d never asked my kids:

“Do you want a spanking”

I’ve slipped from time to time

 

[lotusblossom]

Hey, thanks!

I was wondering though… this might qualify as another thread but since it’s related, I’ll just keep it here. When she was my girlfriend, I couldn’t understand her; now that she’s my wife, I couldn’t understand her even more. I’m thinking that it’s due to the pregnancy. She says she’s not mad but sometimes she sounds like she is. I just don’t get it and probably never will. Did any of you encounter something similar or even worse? It’s really hard being apart, you know?

Speaking as the pregnant lady, don’t try to understand…because it’s mainly pregnancy. My husband has slowly learned this. I cry at random times. I go from being really happy and giving him hugs to mad as a wet hen at him and all he did was crack a joke or not drive the way I thought he should be. I get mad at him for the littlest things, but I also cry for absolutely NO reason at all, other than I’m just super emotional during this time. He asks what’s wrong, but if I tell him it’s nothing and mean it, he just asks what he can do (ie. a hug, foot massage, drink of water, etc.). Sometimes all I need is a hug, sometimes I need him to go out and buy me soy icecream, sometimes I just need to lay down. He knows that trying to solve my problems through talking them out isn’t going to help one bit. I call myself “bipolar lady” now . Just love her in the ways she loves best. I hope that helps…just know you’re not alone by any stretch.

Last night at our birthing class (there’s about ten couples), we split into men and women and made lists of what the husband should do during pregnancy and birth (it’s husband-coached birthing, so the husband’s role is maximized ). Most of the men (according to my husband) mentioned that their wives are crazy-emotional all the time. We said the same thing about ourselves. It just happens. Too many surging hormones .

 

[CatholicSamurai]

Wow… I have a lot of things to consider. Thank you, thank you and thank you! Now I have a much better sense with all the insight you’ve all given.

I will consider giving her a book on pregnancy… on Valentines Day! That’s a good idea, I think. What’s a good pregnancy book, by the way? Any recommendations?

Again… thanks for all the wonderful insight. Children are definitely gifts. I will definitely offer mine to God like how Samuel was offered by his mother in the Bible. Don’t you think that would be great?

 

[CatholicSamurai]

bump… Ooop! Sorry to do this… I just didn’t want to start a new thread altogether.

I managed to purchase a pregnancy book for my wife. It’s titled, “Your Pregnancy Week by Week”. I kinda chose it over “What to Expect When You’re Expecting”. The book I bought was straight forward and easy to read. It also had notes/tips for dads which is why I chose it.

I was wondering if anyone has any better books out there.

 

[Brian_C]

“What to Expect” is a good, comprehensive book but at the same time has a few outdated recommendations and worries. It can also get first-timers a tad paranoid. I don’t think we even opened during the second pregnancy.

 

[CatholicSamurai]

My wife is finally getting the morning sickness. I’m being driven nuts… but I have to acknowledge that it’s the pregnancy talking, not my wife. I do feel awful that she has to suffer these things.

But on another note, I am glad to see her like this… because she’s carrying the fruit of our labor. Sorry… I meant that in the best possible way.

 

[lotusblossom]

My wife is finally getting the morning sickness. I’m being driven nuts… but I have to acknowledge that it’s the pregnancy talking, not my wife. I do feel awful that she has to suffer these things.

But on another note, I am glad to see her like this… because she’s carrying the fruit of our labor. Sorry… I meant that in the best possible way.

LoL! I must say I think my husband felt the same way during that time…now, it’s probably even worse, because I’m so huge I can’t do anything. He helps me put on my shoes, carries EVERYTHING, and massages my feetsies and back all the time. Plus, I get annoyed with him for anything and everything at times.

We’re taking Bradley birthing classes (which I would strongly recommend over Lamaz) and we had to split into men and women groups and discuss what we though the husband’s roles were during pregnancy/birth. All of us women were brainstorming and one lady mentioned how the husbands should help out with the little things, and I said, “Or the big things…my husband does all the laundry.” They all turned to me with big eyes, and one of them said, “Please say that again when all our husbands are here!” lol! I was chuckling to myself. I will say, my husband has definitely been a good sport in all of this !

 

[TOP]

I found that my wife changed slightly at about the 7th month of her first pregnancy. She never changed back. The motherly instinct is very powerful. Be ready to adapt. Being a good dad will be the key to her heart. Tim