For Parents, On Your Social Lives

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ThyKingdomCome

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This poll is for parents with the kids at home. How often do you do something social (not going to meetings or Church groups, but all fun) with another family? (This would include your family with a couple who does or doesn’t have children. This does NOT include things you do without your spouse, or family gatherings. I’m talking friends here.)

And are you content with this level of social activity?
 
We actually have a group from our old parish ( 8 families) that meet once a month. Even though we attend a differant parish now we are still active in the group. We meet at my old church for diiner, religious related activities, games and crafts. Over the summer we’re more informal with pic-nic, and bar-b-que type activities.
And yes I am satisfied with the level of socializing.
 
We know a lot of couples that we get together with fairly often. I guess I am satisfied that we have these friends, yet I’m also dissatisfied because we don’t make arrangements to get together often enough. I chose every 2 months, and this is mainly because my husband works a second job every friday night. There are also quite a few family parties in our extended families. Overall I feel good about it, though.
 
It is a rare week that goes by where we don’t have a gathering with another family (usually including kids). We thoroughly enjoy our level of socializing–esp. since we do not have family living in town–and our kids have become very adept socially. I have to confess, however, that one of my favorite times of the week is Sunday mornings–we usually go to the Sat. vigil mass and spend Sun quietly as a family, in our jammies, eating brunch, playing games, talking…and the beauty of it is that it’s the one time of the week no one intrudes with phone calls, drop-in visits, etc…!
 
I have a network of single mom’s that we try and do something with the kids every few months. Even if it’s just out to McDonalds Playland. It keeps us single mom’s sane and in touch with other Catholics/Christians.
 
A week without getting together with friends would just be strange - most likely someone would be sick for that to happen. Our friends have come from geography (living near by), work, church, many ways - and have all become family!
 
Wish we could find more families willing to socialize with us. Most here have their own families living here and no need for friends. It’s a small town and I fear for our children’s social lives. I want to homeschool because the Catholic school here is sub-par to what I desire for my children in their education.
 
Gosh, 1 to 4 times per week. We have a “core” group of families that get together for child religious education (although dad’s are not usually there), monthly brunches at someone’s house, monthly breakfast after mass, some birthdays and other celebrations. In addition, we probably visit family (grandparents) almost once a week.
 
It’s interesting seeing these results. I’ve wondered about this because our family would like more friends and it seems like we have a lot of trouble finding like-minded families, who we both actually like :o Also, it seems that some (and especially the one family we really like, and who likes us) are so busy being good Christians (working for the Church etc.) that they don’t have time to socialize. Sometimes I wonder if some people are called to go that route or if that indicates an imbalance in your life (or maybe we’re just resentful :rolleyes: ). Clearly, we must continue our search - which means we have to be willing to sacrifice out time too.

When I was a child, my parents had a lot of couple or family friends. We weren’t always having people over, but there was always a lot of socializing after every Sunday mass, and there were always a lot of people to go to, if they wanted to socialize. I’ve looked at this as normal most of my life, but lately have come to notice that most people are not as “super-friendly” as my mom and a lot of families are socially isolated. So I’ve wondered what “average” really is, and if most people are happy with what they have.

It really is a shame that the Churches don’t seem to offer the same kind of community I had growing up. It looks like a lot of people really do feel somewhat isolated.

TKC
 
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jrabs:
I have a network of single mom’s that we try and do something with the kids every few months. Even if it’s just out to McDonalds Playland. It keeps us single mom’s sane and in touch with other Catholics/Christians.
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You? Sane?
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ThyKingdomCome:
it seems like we have a lot of trouble finding like-minded families, who we both actually like :o Also, it seems that some (and especially the one family we really like, and who likes us) are so busy being good Christians (working for the Church etc.) that they don’t have time to socialize. …
It looks like a lot of people really do feel somewhat isolated.
TKC
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Thanks for posting this, I’m glad we’re not the only ones that feel this way. Too bad you live in NY otherwise we could get together 🙂 I have noticed that when the social/friendly thing is not happening for us, it could be a phase where God is calling us to focus on relationships within the family and our personal spiritual lives. Maybe when we’ve learned all we need to learn at home, then He will introduce us to more friends.
 
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abraham:
…I have noticed that when the social/friendly thing is not happening for us, it could be a phase where God is calling us to focus on relationships within the family and our personal spiritual lives. Maybe when we’ve learned all we need to learn at home, then He will introduce us to more friends.
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That’s a great point. He does have know what’s best for us, doesn’t he?
 
We haven’t done something in so many years I’ve lost count, seriously, my oldest is 11 and we have never really done anything without our kids with us since we had kids, we do things with my family or my husbands family but it includes the children too, we have had zero luck finding a babysitter who wants to watch four kids, its seems now days all the teens have jobs at fast food places etc. it is very hard to find a responsible teen where we live and the ones that are willing are booked way in advance and their calenders are full, so I guess until I feel like my oldest is ready to watch her younger siblings and that I know that they will respect their sister as a babysitter hubby and I and the kids will do most everything together but hey, its not even something I think about until I saw this post and had to actually think about “do we do stuff with others outside of church, etc. without the kids”
Thats life I guess 😛
 
My husband is always working, whether at the University or here at home trying to keep our 1989 and 1973 cars running or keep the pipes from freezing or the water filters changed. We have no family for hundreds of miles. But the sons keep bringing their friends in, so I’m able to socialize a little. We’re new to this area and I mourn the friends I left behind. It’s gotten a little better, but I weary many times of men’s conversation! Toys, toys, toys! It is definitely, a valley of tears in this life.
 
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kamz:
We haven’t done something in so many years I’ve lost count, seriously, my oldest is 11 and we have never really done anything without our kids with us since we had kids, we do things with my family or my husbands family but it includes the children too, we have had zero luck finding a babysitter who wants to watch four kids, its seems now days all the teens have jobs at fast food places etc. it is very hard to find a responsible teen where we live and the ones that are willing are booked way in advance and their calenders are full, so I guess until I feel like my oldest is ready to watch her younger siblings and that I know that they will respect their sister as a babysitter hubby and I and the kids will do most everything together but hey, its not even something I think about until I saw this post and had to actually think about “do we do stuff with others outside of church, etc. without the kids”
Thats life I guess 😛
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Since you seem to have family close by, why not let the kids stay with them or have them watch your kids at your house so you and your husband can get out? I can’t imagine never getting away with my husband–with or without friends–and not just for dinner out, but a trip away. Maybe you’ve found your balance…but it doesn’t sound healthy to never get adult time away from your kids.
 
We socialize a couple times a month or better…
We have a couple of families from church that get together to play Sheephead. Our kids are similar ages and they have a great time. It gets a little loud but we sure have a good time and great conversation.
The best is when we all go to 4 o’clock mass on Saturday and then get together for supper and cards.
I think having such close family friends is wonderful as I don’t have any family in the area.
~Weezir
 
We only get together with other families a few times a year. I’d like to do more and we used to. However, we ran into some very bad financial difficulties and the friends we used to go on vacations with, etc. all dried up because we couldn’t “keep up”. With the kids in school, we’re starting to meet other families and have begun to socialize a little more now. I’m hoping so anyways! It sounds like a lot of you are having LOADS of fun!!!

Giannawannabe
 
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