Former LDS Church Members out there?

[RebeccaJ]

Attending my EF parish is wearing my knees and my back and my hips out.

I did Stations of the Cross for the first time a week ago Friday. THAT night wasn’t SO bad but the next 3 or 4 days…OUCH! Its like a physical workout and a spiritual workout all in one!

Today was my first sung mass ever. Do they have the EF in SLC. If so, where at?

Charles

Yeah, Stations involves lunges.

St. Martin De Porres in Taylorsville has one EF Mass. The 11am Mass at the Cathedral is partially sung, in Latin. We sing the Sanctus and Credo. The choir sings a lot of the Mass.

 

[TheExorcist]

Yeah, Stations involves lunges.

St. Martin De Porres in Taylorsville has one EF Mass. The 11am Mass at the Cathedral is partially sung, in Latin. We sing the Sanctus and Credo. The choir sings a lot of the Mass.

My FSSP parish is the ONE reason I wouldn’t want to leave North Idaho. I REALLY miss Salt Lake. Even as an ExMo I STILL miss it. The weird thing is, I still love Temple Square even though I don’t think the church is true any more. (and somewhat shameful confession: I did watch most of GC this weekend. Possibly out of habit?)

 

[Geocacher]

There is a cool support board for those leaving, or going inactive from the LDS church:
forum.newordermormon.org/index.php?sid=34a061b4d466a78f9b413
The New Order Mormons, it is a support forum for those, that have family members, that are still very devoted to the church. I have a Sister, that is still very into the church, and I would never be able to say to her, that I want to leave the church(Resign), because that would cause problems. I went Inactive quite some time ago, and get lots of unexpected visits to my house.

I used to be very into the church myself, but fell out of it.

 

[SpeSalvi]

Hi all,

I’m also looking to experience Holy Week again. Coming into the church last year, it was a VERY powerful experience and I’m anxious to take part in it again

nevadaborn, I married a Catholic man but he was pretty lapsed when we dated and were married. A few years into our marriage, he started really putting effort into his faith, and as his wife that was the most powerful witness I could have had. Just keep up with your prayers; SHOW your family how your newfound faith has changed you for the better, and do your best to let them know that you love them. I argued with my husband about religion until literally the DAY I decided to join the Catholic Church, and I was NOT respectful or subtle in my attacks either. What finally got me was his prayers, and knowing that he was praying for me. It was a beautiful act that touched and softened my heart just enough that the Holy Spirit could get in and point me in the right direction. I’ll pray that your wife and family experience softened hearts so they can see the beauty of the Catholic Church as well I’ll pray for your family if you pray for mine; my parents and 8 siblings are still very involved in the LDS church and religion is something that they simply don’t discuss with me at all (any more, at least… but that’s another story).

How many of you have gone through the process of getting your records removed? I’m in the middle of it right now and it seems as though the bishop of the ward my records are in has decided to ignore my request. I sent my request in to confidential records mid-February, they sent me the letter saying they forwarded my request to my stake president and bishop at the end of February. As soon as I got that, I went ahead and sent polite yet firm letters to the bishop and stake pres saying that I was aware member records was forwarding them letters and that I looked forward to getting confirmation of my record removal. I didn’t hear anything most of March, and then last Friday I got letters from both my visiting teacher and home teacher, which is frustrating because I’ve NEVER been contacted by my VT before and my HT has only swung by the missionaries once about 6 months ago. In the letter from the HT, he said “I know you’re part of another church, I think the Catholic church. That is OK. That does not relieve me of my duty as your Home Teacher”. I’ve been living here for a year, so I’m sure that their sudden interest in fellowshipping me isn’t a coincidence. In previous visits that the missionaries have paid me (they stumble on my apartment while tracting pretty often), I’ve made it clear that I’m happy in the Catholic Church and they don’t seem to “get” it.
Thing is, I’m trying to be as tactful as possible because the bishop and my dad are “temple buddies” (they both work at the temple on Fridays), and I don’t want to make this process any more convoluted than it already is. I worry that if I let it alone or send any more letters they’ll just be ignored, but I don’t know that I can keep my temper over the phone
Has anyone else dealt with this? Have you had to end up threatening legal action like a friend of mine has? I do NOT want my last experience with the LDS church be such a negative one, but I don’t see how I can get this resolved without playing hardball with them.

 

[Sariah]

I have gotten my name removed. It was surprisingy easy for me - I sent in my letter directly to the guy in charge of membership rolls in SLC, Greg Dodge (not sure if he is still in that role) expressing my wish to resign and my wish to NOT be contacted. He was quite cordial about it, and all was said and done within a month or two. Everything I have read has strongly suggested to skip over your Bishop and Stake Pres and go right to Greg…

You might, if you haven’t already, want to check out ExMormon.org community. Here is the link to name removals/resignations: exmormon.org/remove.htm The bullitin boards are really helpful, and there’s always really excellent advice to be had.

 

[nevadaborn]

Exmormon discussion boards are also heavily populated by aggressive mocking atheists, especially exmormon.org. If you mention anything positive about religion be prepared to defend yourself and your faith. Also be prepared to hear some pretty inane and frankly ignorant discussions about religion and Christian history. But on the other hand, those sites can provide a much need social support group for making the sometimes difficult transition out of Mormonism.

 

[Marie5890]

Has anyone else dealt with this? Have you had to end up threatening legal action like a friend of mine has? I do NOT want my last experience with the LDS church be such a negative one, but I don’t see how I can get this resolved without playing hardball with them.

You may need to play hardball. Since they have gotten your resignation, you are no longer LDS. I would send one more communication demanding a confirmation of your name removal and tell them you are to have no contact from either HT or VT’s etc etc. since you are no longer a member.

I personally didnt have a hard time with my resignation, but I know often times many do.

Push it if you need to. You dont need to put up with any of that.

 

[Marie5890]

Exmormon discussion boards are also heavily populated by aggressive mocking atheists, especially exmormon.org. If you mention anything positive about religion be prepared to defend yourself and your faith. Also be prepared to hear some pretty inane and frankly ignorant discussions about religion and Christian history. But on the other hand, those sites can provide a much need social support group for making the sometimes difficult transition out of Mormonism.

All of what you say is true about exmormon.org. It was, however, a great support during the early years of my leaving the LDS church. I knew I was over Mormonism when I left that board…

Yes, there is a great deal of negativity towards faith of any kind there.

 

[Jerusha]

Yes, there is a great deal of negativity towards faith of any kind there.

That is natural, since they have had such problems with Mormonism, they think that there is nothing better. The cultural programming to look down on any other faith, particularly Catholicism, still exists. It takes time and patience.

 

[nevadaborn]

I personally liked the site postmormon.org. A bit more toned down, more substantial discussions/debates. Not as much traffic as exmormon.org though.

 

[Jerusha]

I prefer mormondiscussions. A wide range of posters, from rabid TBM’s to NOM’s to the wide range of exmormons and nevermo’s. I use “ignore” liberally. Very substantive discussions.

 

[nevadaborn]

mormondiscussions does have some pretty intelligent posters on it.

For personal reasons, I’m trying to take a break for a while from mormon related discussion boards (and here I am on catholic.com still posting on mormon topics )

 

[Jerusha]

mormondiscussions does have some pretty intelligent posters on it.

For personal reasons, I’m trying to take a break for a while from mormon related discussion boards (and here I am on catholic.com still posting on mormon topics )

My IQ is around 130, and at times it gets beyond me, but maybe they are just trying to impress people. :juggle:

Yeah, I am going to read the NT. But always with an eye to compare/contrast Catholic/Mormon.

 

[RebeccaJ]

My FSSP parish is the ONE reason I wouldn’t want to leave North Idaho. I REALLY miss Salt Lake. Even as an ExMo I STILL miss it. The weird thing is, I still love Temple Square even though I don’t think the church is true any more. (and somewhat shameful confession: I did watch most of GC this weekend. Possibly out of habit?)

I had a desire for a long time, years ago, to keep a “pulse”, so to speak, on Mormonism. My parents and siblings are LDS, and when I’m around them I can feel left out of the conversation, so I tried to keep informed.

I don’t any longer. I figured out a long time ago that unless you’re a true believing Mormon doing all their activities, the fact is you are excluded. Just have to accept that fact and move on.

I’ve been out of Mormonism for nearly 30 years now. I’ve built my life without it. It intrudes often, living here in Utah with all my Mormon family, but it has no centrality to anything I do or think.

Temple Square, to me, is like Disneyland, a lot of work to keep up a certain appearance for the customers. When I worked downtown, I would cross through it once in a while. Always gave me the heebie-jeebies. But that is how I feel in Mormon churches, so, that’s probably just me.

 

[Jerusha]

When I worked downtown, I would cross through it once in a while. Always gave me the heebie-jeebies.

If I ever go to Utah for any reason, you can guard me against my PTSD :hug3:

 

[SpeSalvi]

I just got a TEXT from “my” home teacher. I wasn’t even aware he had my cell phone number. Getting written communication after I specifically told them IN WRITING that they were to NOT contact me unless it is to confirm that my records have been removed is bad enough, but now I have to put up with texting? Geeze louise. The home teacher is the ward clerk as well, so there’s no doubt he’s seen my letter.

I have a friend that’s a paralegal working for her lawyer dad and I’m considering asking if they could send in a letter stating that ANY other communication that I receive from them will be reported as harassment.

I’m definitely not getting the vibe that this will be an easy, no-hassle thing for me. However, it’ll be good penance to handle this during Holy Week and, come Sunday, I’m going to REALLY celebrate being part of God’s TRUE Church; the one that does NOT use manipulative “fellowshipping” tactics to try and retain members.

Still debating whether I actually give the bishop of this ward a call and talk to him before I send any official communication. It seems like a bad idea, but the charitable person in me really wants to give them a chance to explain that their inaction has just been part of a big misunderstanding.

 

[twopekinguys]

I just got a TEXT from “my” home teacher. I wasn’t even aware he had my cell phone number. Getting written communication after I specifically told them IN WRITING that they were to NOT contact me unless it is to confirm that my records have been removed is bad enough, but now I have to put up with texting? Geeze louise. The home teacher is the ward clerk as well, so there’s no doubt he’s seen my letter.

I have a friend that’s a paralegal working for her lawyer dad and I’m considering asking if they could send in a letter stating that ANY other communication that I receive from them will be reported as harassment.

I’m definitely not getting the vibe that this will be an easy, no-hassle thing for me. However, it’ll be good penance to handle this during Holy Week and, come Sunday, I’m going to REALLY celebrate being part of God’s TRUE Church; the one that does NOT use manipulative “fellowshipping” tactics to try and retain members.

Still debating whether I actually give the bishop of this ward a call and talk to him before I send any official communication. It seems like a bad idea, but the charitable person in me really wants to give them a chance to explain that their inaction has just been part of a big misunderstanding.

As we Catholics are fond of saying, “Offer it up.”

Unfortunately, you are in a difficult situation. Sort of a double edge sword.

Yow want to be “Christian” about the whole thing, but you don’t want the hassle. (I don’t envy you)

If you call, it can give the impression that you are wavering, and may change your mind. On the other hand, if you send a forceful letter, then you come off as hostile or a jerk.

Personally, I would just text the guy back, and politely say, please don’t text me any more, and please process my paperwork, and leave it at that.

But, that is just me.

God Bless!!

 

[TheExorcist]

I just got a TEXT from “my” home teacher. I wasn’t even aware he had my cell phone number. Getting written communication after I specifically told them IN WRITING that they were to NOT contact me unless it is to confirm that my records have been removed is bad enough, but now I have to put up with texting? Geeze louise. The home teacher is the ward clerk as well, so there’s no doubt he’s seen my letter.

I have a friend that’s a paralegal working for her lawyer dad and I’m considering asking if they could send in a letter stating that ANY other communication that I receive from them will be reported as harassment.

I’m definitely not getting the vibe that this will be an easy, no-hassle thing for me. However, it’ll be good penance to handle this during Holy Week and, come Sunday, I’m going to REALLY celebrate being part of God’s TRUE Church; the one that does NOT use manipulative “fellowshipping” tactics to try and retain members.

Still debating whether I actually give the bishop of this ward a call and talk to him before I send any official communication. It seems like a bad idea, but the charitable person in me really wants to give them a chance to explain that their inaction has just been part of a big misunderstanding.

I guess it depends on who your Bishop and Stake President are will determine how easy the process is. If you want your name removed I would just send the letter. I met with my Stake President a couple weeks ago. He called me because he heard I was having “struggles”. I guess you could call total loss of testimony and finding out the church is a complete scam “struggles”. He told me if I was inclined to have my name removed from the records of the church all I had to do is write my Bp the letter. I guess the Bp is required to wait a month (I think he said a month) as a cooling off period before he forwards the letter to the SP. And then it’s only a matter of a couple weeks before everything is done. Again, I think it depends on your Bp and how stubborn they are about “keeping their flock together”. Although considering past litigation it’s surprising “the Brethren” do not instruct in NO uncertain terms how these things are to be handled. Of course, the church has DEEP pockets (case in point City Creek Center). Good luck with that. If you’ve actually joined the Catholic church the LDS church is SUPPOSED to ex you…of course that depends on your Bp and SP as well…round and round cue circus music :sad_yes: