Who else finds themselves committing mortal sins every single week? Given the Church’s understanding of “grave matter” I can honestly say I have never once gone a single week of my life without committing a mortal sin. Quite often I don’t even go a single day. It seems so extraordinarily easy to damn your soul through sin, I honestly don’t know how any of you are ever able to receive the Eucharist or be in a “state of grace”.
Its like any sin that is fun, at all, is mortal. I sin like that all the time. I don’t like this fact, but its true. How on earth do you people stay free of these mortal sins? It seems that every single thing I love to do will damn my soul to Hell. Do you guys really not sin like this? How’s that even possible? And what is someone like me supposed to do? Just go to confession every single week without fail?
All sins originate in your mind, since they are acts of the will. While we have weak wills and can be strongly willed to avoid something one day, and fall into it the next, we have to work on strengthening our will against sin. Just say “Mary, obtain for me the desire to want to stop sinning.”
Sins against purity start with your head, either through your eyes or your mind. Impure thoughts pop into our head, and we encounter impure images even when we do not want to. If we immediately look away or change our thoughts, there is no sin. If we hesitate and partially give in (think like 1 mississippi) then that is a venial sin, and if we fully give in to the image or thought that’s mortal sin. If we intentionally look at the image or intentionally think the thought, that’s always a mortal sin.
No Intention, No Consent = No Sin (immediately look away)
No Intention, Partial Consent = Venial Sin (whoops, immediately look away)
No Intention, Full Consent = Mortal Sin (check that out!)
Any Intention = Mortal Sin (I will look at this magazine, I will think about ___)
As soon as you inadvertently see something impure or have an impure thought, you gotta shake things up. Immediately say “Jesus, Mary, Joseph, St. Maria Goretti, Guardian Angel, help me” or a Hail Mary. Then call on the Precious Blood of Jesus “Most Precious Blood of Jesus, wash over me.” and then think of something fun but pure, like water skiing or hot air balloons or something that you really like that is not a sin. It’s also extremely helpful to move your body to help move your mind. As long as you’re fighting, you aren’t sinning, no matter how many times you have to fight this fight. You will gain custody over your mind and your eyes the more you do this, and that will make the other sins easier to avoid.
The next thing is, you must be firmly resolved to avoid sin and the near occasion of sin in order for your confession to be valid. If you fully intend to never commit mortal sins against purity again, then you have nothing to worry about, and frequently falling back into the same sin doesn’t automatically mean you did not have firm resolution. If you are already thinking of your next hook up, and you go to confession, you leave the confessional with all the sins you went in with, plus a new one of making a sacrilegious confession. This part is highly individual and your confessor can work it out with you, but the best thing is to think through your recent sins and see what the surrounding facts were. Some examples:
-Do I still have the phone numbers of people I sin with saved in my phone?
-Do I still plan to visit places that tend to lead to sin (bad bars, bad parties)
-Do I still have unfiltered internet access to access the apps and websites that helped me sin last time?
-Is there anything I have, that I would not need if I were to never commit these sins again (contraceptives, hook up apps, certain clothing items, novelties, etc.)?
-Do I already have concrete plans to sin again (dates, etc.)?
It’s an awful battle but there are so many practical and spiritual tools available. Set to work disabling and dismantling sin’s control of your life. Be creative, it will eventually be a labor of love, and you be eternally thankful.
