Funeral Mass qualms!

[dezembrum]

Sorry for the long post, but I thought I would run a moral question by you good folks. My Grandfather’s Funeral Mass was this past Saturday. He was Catholic, and so is most of his extended family. My immediate family (brother, sister, and mother) are not; I am the only practicing Catholic among them. My father is non-practicing (he is divorvced and remarried, and has not been receiving the sacraments for about forty years now).

Long story short, pretty much EVERYONE received Communion at Mass (including my brother, sister, father, and mother - one of whom isn’t even quite sure of God’s existence!!!) The priest made NO anouncement that only Catholics in a state of grace are to receive, nor was there anything I could see in the pews that made such a statement.

Anyhow, my question is whether or not I sinned by omission. The night before my father asked me to not be “too horrified” if he received Communion. When he told me this I was too taken aback to say anything except “Right” when he said “I know you don’t agree with me…” The next day the subject came up in the presence of my brother, sister, and father. This time I was a little better prepared, and explained in their presence that non-Catholics are not to receive Communion, and also that an anouncement is usually (or so I thought) made that only Catholics in state of grace are invited to receive the Sacrament.

However, my qualm is that I did not say enough. Should I have said “you will be commiting a grave sin by receiving Communion.” Should I have vigorously debated my father and brother on the topic? At the time I was still taken aback and didn’t quite have my wits about me, though I did try to put forth Church teaching. On the other hand, I didn’t want to let all you-know-what break loose by touching a sore spot and debating everything they said (this conversation happened right after the wake and shortly before the funeral). I should perhaps add that I have spoken to the non-Catholics in my family before that they cannot receive Communion (occasionally they’ll come to Mass with me) and my Father simply knows better (i.e. that he has to be reconciled with the Church and have his marriage convalidated before receiving the Sacraments).

Anyhow, if you all could give me some feedback, I would appreciate it…am I just being scrupulous as per usual, or do I need to run off to confession?

 

[Toni]

You said your peace that non Catholics are not to receive. Unfortunately the priest let you down by not making the announcement. Many priests don’t anymore. You told your family up front. You can’t stand in the aisle and stop them. I typed funeral programs and programs for weddings and often have included that in the program. That way everyone can also read it in the program if it is not announced.

 

[stbruno]

Unfortunately, people have free wills, and they choose to act responsibly or to act irresponsibly when they knew they should not receive Holy Communion. I wish more priests would announce this at weddings, funerals, first HolyCommunions, Confirmations etc, where many people are attending but are not Catholics. We can only pray on this. I am sure this is not what you want to remember about your grandfather’s funeral. Talk to your own priest about your personal horror of your family’s abuse of the sacrament. Perhaps he can relieve you of your conscience. Pray, pray and pray for your family. Perhaps, they are feeling the void in their life without communion and need your prayers.

 

[UKcatholicGuy]

You let them know they were not to receive. That should’ve been enough for them. You’re fine. No sin of omission in my opinion, and I commend you for speaking up as you did.