Gay Marriage before conversion

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Chyrses

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Question : I was recently asked if converts who enter the Church should divorce their spouse if they are in a celibate same sex marriage. I believe the answer is very clearly that yes, they should divorce, but I wasn’t able to find any specific teaching or ruling on this. Does anyone know of any specific canons, or church documents on this? I know this seems like an obvious and basic question, but I’m looking for all the resources i can get. Thanks in advance!
 
The Bible makes it clear that gay marriage would be an abomination. Marriage is supposed to be a representation of Jesus and YOU. I’m no good when it comes to church documents but…

You can’t help how you feel, gay or straight, but you can help what you do about it. Sin is normal, though always wrong and unjustified, but openly sinning would cause me to question your faith:

Why would you want to convert to Christianity and remain in a gay marriage? I’d give everything that I have if it meant never sinning again; I hate how I feel after I sin! Becoming Christian, to me, just means that I’m not paying for my sins when I die, anymore, I’m TRUSTING Jesus to have been enough. I’m risking my eternity by trusting Him! I know I will keep on sinning, and despising myself for it, that I’ll be forgiven, but I’d do anything to end the guilt now that I understand what Jesus has actually done for us.
 
Dont worry about Church document about it.

Follow the Spirit.

The Church forbids these United States unions. Many are afraid to even say that.

Yes, Jesus encourages divorce of these illicit unions.
 
The best course of action would be for the person to talk to their priest and discuss all the details of their individual situation, and receive guidance on what to do.

Obviously if the person entering the Church is hoping to marry an opposite-gender person in the Church later on, then they would need to divorce their same-sex spouse in order to be free to marry again in USA, since the Church marriage in USA would also be a legal marriage and the spouses need to be legally free to marry in the eyes of the state as well as the Church. They also would not need to seek an annulment of the same-sex marriage because the Church doesn’t recognize it.
 
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So the answer is YES, DIVORCE THAT STATE MARRIAGE. Why would a Catholic priest say anything else?
 
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Ammi said:
So the answer is YES, DIVORCE THAT STATE MARRIAGE. Why would a Catholic priest say anything else?
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There may be children involved. Or the couple may be 85 years old. Or there may be issues of economic support, citizenship, all kinds of things. It’s clear they will have to live as “brother and brother” or “sister and sister” and not engage in sexual relations with each other, but I am not sure they would be forced in all cases to civilly divorce.

I have tagged the marriage experts on here who will hopefully come and respond with the correct answer.
 
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Doing the right thing does not equal “forcing”.

Those are not just reasons for staying in a union condemned by the Church.
 
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I would not call myself a “marriage expert”.

Canon law does not address this, because it’s a non-thing. It’s not a marriage and never can be. Just like canon law doesn’t address civil marriages involving Catholics without dispensation— again it’s a non-thing.

One or two people wishing to become Catholic who are in a same sex civil marriage, and willing to live according to the moral law regarding SSA? Sounds like uncharted territory. This would be a prudential matter under guidance of the pastor as to the purely civil aspects of their situation.

Remember, the Church does not have a teaching or a law for everything, and is usually slow to make pronouncements without a lot of study and consideration. For example, “test tube babies” were 10 years down the road from Louise Brown before the Church issued Donum Vitae.

I am sure that eventually we will hear more from the Church on pastoral care for those in such situations as the OP asks about, and other situations, but probably not any time soon.
 
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1ke said:
Canon law does not address this, because it’s a non-thing. It’s not a marriage and never can be. Just like canon law doesn’t address civil marriages involving Catholics without dispensation— again it’s a non-thing.
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Civil marriage is definitely NOT a “non-thing”. It’s a contract entered into by two citizens. One in which the State has made it’s own anti-Christian definitions regarding.
One or two people wishing to become Catholic who are in a same sex civil marriage, and willing to live according to the moral law regarding SSA? Sounds like uncharted territory. This would be a prudential matter under guidance of the pastor as to the purely civil aspects of their situation.
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Not uncharted, I’m sure. Even civil aspects of a forbidden marriage should be removed.
 
Just because canon law doesnt address it, does not mean it’s a “non-thing”.

You said,

Remember, the Church does not have a teaching or a law for everything, and is usually slow to make pronouncements without a lot of study and consideration.
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Will the Church spend alot of time, study, and consideration about a “non-thing”?
 
The OP asked specifically for “canons” or “church documents” on this.

Opinions are just that - opinions. You can say “I think Jesus would want this” all day long - it’s still your opinion if the Church hasn’t spoken to the issue.

It seems pretty clear that as of now, there simply aren’t any “canons” or “church documents”, and a person in a gay civil marriage wishing to convert would need to discuss with their priest.
 
If something is forbidden by the Church to begin with, why would the Church advise someone to remain in it?

Just because the Church hasn’t “spoken” specifically about something, that doesnt mean every opinion is wrong. Neither does it mean Catholics cannot know, in faith, what they should do.
 
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Ammi said:
If something is forbidden by the Church to begin with, why would the Church advise someone to remain in it?
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First, the Church hasn’t advised anything one way or the other for this situation. It appears to be up to the pastoral guidance and prudential judgment of the priest handling RCIA and perhaps his bishop, if the bishop wants to issue some diocesan rule. You can have an opinion all you want, but the opinion of the priest and/or the bishop is going to control the particular situation here.

Second, I listed a number of factors that a priest or bishop might take into account, in my post above already. The Church already has cases where people have, before conversion, entered into heterosexual marriages that the Church doesn’t permit and that cannot be recognized by the Church (an annulment is not possible for some reason). These people are not always required to divorce. Some of them live as brother and sister, some of them don’t live together at all but also don’t divorce. It seems likely there may be cases of gay marriages treated similarly.
 
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I understand. The current Church is capable of all sorts of things.

Homosexual marriage cannot rightly be compared, however, with any heterosexual marriage, by it’s very nature.

I’m looking at the big picture.

Imagine the faithful behaving in such a way that the Bishops actually see the Holy Spirit working in the children of the Church. Instead of acting like those who approached Moses, with burdens and groans, and hard hearts, pressing him to concede to compromises.

Canon law does not give step by step instructions for converting to Jesus. I’m not saying canon law is useless, or that the OP’s question is poor. But that the faithful do not need to feel without moral guidance because canon law has not formulated a manual guide for procedures.

The Church is slow with these things for various reasons. She seldom forges the way before cultural obstacles encumber situations and lives, and establish a stronghold. Compromises are made, and ground is lost. That’s the unfortunate reality of the Church in this dark world.

If individuals want to convert in heart to Jesus, sacrifices and suffering are inevitable. This is something that I seldom hear in our Church.

Clergy cannot always tell a Christian what should be sacrificed. Maybe some good pastors are out there, who know how to encourage the narrow path. Many steer clear of encouraging difficult choices, even when there is canon law to support. They figure the poor faithful Christian cannot bear it.

Our parishes could really use assistance programs to enroll in for going through difficult situations. Once again, that requires the laity to be much more active and inspired than we are.
 
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AFIK there is no mention of same sex marriage in Canon law.

I seem to remember one of the people interviewed in “The Third Way” was a practicing Catholic and living platonically with their former partner. The folks over at Courage would know the latest.
 
One thing that came to mind was, if a partner in a gay marriage made a promise to financially support their partner, would they still be so required? Also, if there is an adopted Child, or Child from a past heterosexual relationship, how much would the parents’ partner be liable for the Child?

So many possibilities may arise? Yes, no Christian should enter such a relationship, plan for a future in it, etc., but the fact remains, gay marriage is legal and binding in the U.S.

I’m certainly no expert. But these are the facts. And deciding that a marriage is wrong, by one or even both partners does not automatically dissolve such s relationship agreement!

I just hope that the church never has to recognize such unions…as the state legalized it, let them take care of it!
 
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In the United States, I believe all States do not care for a reason to divorce (dissolve).

Terms of divorce can be worked out.
 
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