General confession advice

[Joseph159]

Hi - I’m preparing to do a general confession and need advice. I haven’t made the appt with the pried yet but am worried based on past experience with certain priests who didn’t really take stuff seriously or denied something was a sin (when it was). So I need a good solid priest. Is there any question i can pose to him to discern this ? (Basically I don’t want to waste my time confessing stuff to a non-orthodox priest).

Any other advice ? I’m really nervous.

 

[TheLittleLady]

Errrr, to go in assuming that the priest does not measure up to your standards seems to get off on the wrong foot.

Your Bishop has appointed a Priest to be your Pastor, he has each Priest in the Diocese exactly where he feels they should be. Trust your Bishop. Trust your Pastor.

 

[Joseph159]

Thanks. It’s not that I don’t trust my pastor. I’m not even going to my parish. It’s based on past experience. But I appreciate your reply.

 

[pianistclare]

If a priest told you something was not sinful it was not sinful.
Go. Be repentant and don’t presume you know more than the priest.
Pray the litany of humility before you go, and make a good confession.

 

[GodSoughtMe]

Whether the priest is correct or incorrect on the sinfulness and/or severity of the act, the sacrament remains valid because God is the primary minister in every sacrament - and He Who is Truth knows the Truth.

The formula is “I forgive you of these and all sins.” All sins. Even the ones you honestly forgot, even the ones the priest denies.

 

[Vico]

… certain priests who didn’t really take stuff seriously or denied something was a sin (when it was). …

Sin properly refers to mortal sin, and so can be material (when culpable or not) or actual (only when culpable). Venial sins are not properly sin, for they do not entail a loss of charity. So these distinctions could be a source of misunderstanding between the priest and yourself.

 

[ProdglArchitect]

Ermm… I have to disagree with this. I’ve had a priest tell me masturbation is not sinful.

The confession is still valid, but priests can be wrong from time to time.

 

[phil19034]

Joseph159:

… certain priests who didn’t really take stuff seriously or denied something was a sin (when it was). …

Sin properly refers to mortal sin, and so can be material (when culpable or not) or actual (only when culpable). Venial sins are not properly sin, for they do not entail a loss of charity. So these distinctions could be a source of misunderstanding between the priest and yourself.

Not true.

I John 5:16-18:

If anyone sees his brother committing a sin that is not a deadly sin, he will ask, and God will give him life for those whose sin is not deadly. There is sin which is deadly; I do not say one is to pray for that. All wrongdoing is sin, but there is sin which is not deadly. We know that anyone born of God does not sin, but He who is born of God keeps him, and the evil one does not touch him.

Mortal and Venial Sin?

The most common Bible verse used against the very Catholic and very biblical doctrines concerning mortal and venial sin is James 2:10-11: For whoever keeps the...

www.catholic.com

In the quote above, St. John is talking about Mortal vs Venial sin.

 

[phil19034]

Hi - I’m preparing to do a general confession and need advice. I haven’t made the appt with the pried yet but am worried based on past experience with certain priests who didn’t really take stuff seriously or denied something was a sin (when it was). So I need a good solid priest. Is there any question i can pose to him to discern this ? (Basically I don’t want to waste my time confessing stuff to a non-orthodox priest).

Any other advice ? I’m really nervous.

I would not worry about this. Go behind the screen, if that makes you feel better, and confess your sins to God. In the remote chance that Father tells you something heretical, simply do your penance and avoid him in the future, if possible.

God Bless

 

[Joseph159]

Thanks everyone. I am not presuming to know more than the priest but I live in an ultra liberal diocese and have experienced some “out there” priests, not saying “in this case it isn’t a sin for such and such reason” but flat out “oh don’t worry about that it’s not a sin” - when it is atleast sinful matter.

And it’s one thing to go to a routine confession and deal with that type of priest but quite another to set up a general confession of all past sins in life. Like I said I want to make it count and want a good solid confessor.

 

[pianistclare]

Perhaps, but I still think this is very rare.
Peace

 

[Cimachol]

If a priest told you something was not sinful it was not sinful.

I have had priests tell me that certain things are not sinful in direct contradiction of other priests and of the Catechism. They are not infallible.

 

[Cimachol]

If you plan to do your general confession to a priest who is not from your parish, I would suggest going to a few Masses being said by that priest before hand. Chances are that if he’s prone to stray from the Church’s teaching, you’ll be able to tell.

Regarding the general confession itself, I would encourage you to make an appointment to have it heard, out of consideration for the priest and the people who come to confession at the regularly designated time. Have you been given a guide on how to prepare for a general confession?

 

[Vico]

… Not true. …

I mean properly as in “the perfect notion of sin, which Augustine gives, applies to mortal sin.”

See St. Thomas Aquinas, Summa Theologiae > First Part of the Second Part >
Question 88. Venial and mortal sin > Article 1. Whether venial sin is fittingly condivided with mortal sin?

Reply to Objection 1. The division of sin into venial and mortal is not a division of a genus into its species which have an equal share of the generic nature: but it is the division of an analogous term into its parts, of which it is predicated, of the one first, and of the other afterwards. Consequently the perfect notion of sin, which Augustine gives, applies to mortal sin. On the other hand, venial sin is called a sin, in reference to an imperfect notion of sin, and in relation to mortal sin: even as an accident is called a being, in relation to substance, in reference to the imperfect notion of being. For it is not “against” the law, since he who sins venially neither does what the law forbids, nor omits what the law prescribes to be done; but he acts “beside” the law, through not observing the mode of reason, which the law intends.

http://www.newadvent.org/summa/2088.htm#article2

 

[Joseph159]

Very good advice to attend mass said by the priest as well as making appt & preparing. Totally understand.

 

[TheLittleLady]

The culpability for the sin may be diminished or even gone completely depending things your Priest is trained to spot.

 

[TheOldColonel]

Don’t try to screen your priests. Rather, listen to him. God will work through the sacrament regardless of the priest’s failings. It doesn’t hurt to be challenged to think outside the box once in a while either. You might gain new insight even if you don’t agree.

 

[exnihilo]

Find an FSSP priest. I understand where you are coming from. But you need to be charitable and be careful not to assume a priest is not orthodox.

 

[Joseph159]

To be honest, I attempted a GC Like 10 years ago - set up an appt but the priest didn’t show up. Then last month I emailed another priest and never received a reply in 3 weeks. So I called left message and still no answer. Called yesterday multiple times and no answer. Maybe I should just forget it ? Very discouraged and wondering how to discern whether to continue with this.

 

[Cimachol]

Maybe I should just forget it ? Very discouraged and wondering how to discern whether to continue with this.

What led you to consider making a general confession in the first place? I did it once when going through the spiritual exercises of St. Ignatius, but as someone prone to scrupulosity and second-guessing myself in general, I don’t know how healthy it was for me, personally. Of course, if I hadn’t gone, I’d be second-guessing whether or not I should have gone.

Do you have any orders of priests near where you live? We have a Norbertine abbey in my area where the priests have a little more time to hear a general confession. A parish priest may worry that hearing a general confession will take too long. (Actually, it should only take 15 to 20 minutes if you prepare well, which is why I mentioned preparation in an earlier reply.)

The way I was told to prepare was to start at age 7, the presumed age of reason, and look at my life over blocks of time. So, there was elementary school, high school, college, the remainder of my twenties, then my thirties, and so on. For each time block, I went through the commandments and looked at what sins I had committed against each, venial or mortal, and for mortal sins, approximately how many times I had committed each sin. I wrote everything down on a chart to help me remember. Prep time was at least two hours, but the confession went pretty quickly – "From age 7 to 12, I believe I took the Lord’s name in vain approximately X times. I lied to my parents approximately X times … " and so forth. No stories about why I committed various sins – just the sins themselves. There’s some guessing, because there were certain sins I was likely to have committed daily or more at certain times. At the end, I said something like, “For these sins and any sins that I have forgotten or am unaware of, I am truly sorry and ask for God’s forgiveness.” I brought my chart with me to the confessional and shredded it afterward.

Maybe if you let the priest know that you will be organizing your confession to make it brief, he will be more receptive to taking the time to hear it. Whatever you decide, God be with you, and may you find the peace you seek.