Definately patience is needed!!! Don’t ask for it, because then you’ll be placed in situations to test that patience
.
I have a really good friend who, because of his need to take care of his parents (and operate a small business they all own) right now, is not able to join a monastery at this moment(if he could, he would have been there quite awhile ago). He sees, though, his current state in life as good training for a monastic life. He’s practicing the vow of stability in that he’s lived and worked in the same place for 13 years (and both places are about a block apart). In his current distance from the monastery (both physically and… not quite sure of a good word, but I guess the closest would be situationally) he is really appreciative of the quiet times that he can pray and that those times are only fueling his desire more, and it is his hope that, in his practice of patience, when he does finally join it will be much, much more joyful and blessed experience because of the current distance. Like Shakespere said, absence
does make the heart grow fonder.
Some of the other suggestions, especially about taking classes and learning as much as you can right now are spot on. Do you practice Lectio Divina? Most monasteries I’ve encountered have Lectio in a place of great importance (especially Trappist(ine) and Benedictine… those are the ones I’m most familiar with but I know other Orders do, as well). I would suggest to speak with others who are in religious vocations, especially ones who have answered their call as their “second career” (for lack of a better term) or who have had delays in being able to fulfill their own vocation. My own confessor went to school for 14 years before he received Holy Orders. Contact vocation directors at some of the convents you feel the most drawn to at this time (and realize that may change as you know them and yourself better). Even if you have no specific questions, ask for prayers. All of the vocation directors I’ve contacted have been more than happy to pray for me as I’ve been discerning.
Hold on to that feeling of being a “stranger in a strange land”, too. Use those feeling to deepen your relationship with Christ. When you feel lonly, like others don’t understand you, and you’re thought of as “crazy”… know that Our Lord experienced this, too. I suggest a careful re-read of the Gospel of St. Mark (well… all Gospels, but St. Mark seems to focus a bit more than others on the Humanity of Jesus). Especially check out Mark 3:21 (and a few of the surrounding passages).
May God shower you with blessings as you discern with your vocation!
E
My dear aunt of the same name followed the path you are about to embark on when she was but sixteen years old. As you know, now you have to be a wee bit older. She felt the calling very strongly as well when she was but wee.