Getting to know Jesus

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MiriamPhilomena

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Hello, I didn’t know where to post this question, I hope I’m in the right section!

I’ve been reverted to my faith for a little over a year now, and there have been a lot of bumps in the road. I just got out of a state of mortal sin, and I can’t help but feel like I don’t know Jesus. He seems so familiar yet so distant to me. Praying the Rosary is hardly helping. I’ve read all the Gospels and I felt detached the whole time. I only feel closer when I visualize Him during prayer, and I’ve heard from some sources that visualization is dangerous/a feel-good thing.

Any advice would be much appreciated 🙂
 
Don’t read through the Gospels. Dwell with the. Take your time with them. Use an on-line interlinear bible. Read one verse and explore every word.
 
Miriam,

Matthew Kelly, the Catholic motivational speaker, wrote a book called “Rediscover Jesus: An Invitation”. It’s available from DynamicCatholic, Kelly’s organization. You may be able to get it at no charge from their web site.

And, I want to tell you that I empathize with you 100%! I question why God loves me. I believe He does, but have my doubts. So, all I can tell you is to keep up your prayers and keep going to Church. Your faith will come!

Stuart
 
Maybe I have the same experience some years ago like you have now. During that time I read a Q & A in EWTN journal in which a Reverend Father gave a reply to a question about prayers that feelings and moods shouldn’t impede our Catholic prayers and spiritual activities. I took that advice and I prayed the Rosary and The Chaplet of Divine Mercy everyday no matter how I feel or think especially about God, Jesus and Mary. Today, I go to Church every Sunday and every time I go out I make efforts to visit any Catholic Church, for I truly believe Jesus is really present in the tabernacle.

I still experience good and bad things. but often I am puzzled why some good things happen to me out of nowhere.
 
Onthewayhome,

The same things happen to me frequently! In fact, as I like to tell people, I shouldn’t be alive today! There are no coincidences, my friend. The Lord does indeed watch out for us even when we don’t want Him to. Those “good” things you experience come from Him. He’s just letting you know He’s watching over you.
 
Perhaps spend some time in quiet adoration and let Jsus speak to you.
 
Grow in holiness and right reason. Continue your prayers. Eventually you will know, and He will dwell in your heart. Use the Sacraments and pray.
 
Don’t get sidetracked by the protestant notion of a ‘personal relationship with Jesus’ which separates Jesus from His Church. You will fully know Jesus through the Catholic Church, indeed, that is why He established the Church. Through the Sacraments He instituted for us especially the Eucharist (Jesus said…‘I will be with you always’) and His teachings (doctrine…‘if you love me you will obey my commandments’).
 
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Early in your reversion, you might just feel the way you do. I reverted a little over two years ago, and I didn’t feel “close” to Jesus until well after my first year back. I felt a lot closer to Mary during that time, and I think she helped me get closer to Him. Now I’m worried that I’m “neglecting” her!

Continue praying your rosary. Mary will help you. I would also recommend you read Divine Mercy In My Soul and pray the Divine Mercy chaplet if you can. Continue reading your Bible- not just the gospels- and make frequent use of the Sacraments.
 
Hi Miriam!

The best advice I can offer to you is to spend time with the Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament! Find a Church close to you that offers Perpetual Adoration, or has Adoration at certain times of the week, and then go! You can kneel or sit in front of the Blessed Sacrament, pray, say the Rosary, talk to Jesus, read the Bible, or even just sit there. Try and spend time with Jesus in this way every week.

I can’t emphasis enough how much Adoration has changed my life, and will change yours too. What better way is there to get to know your Saviour, your best friend, the person who loves you more than anyone, than to spend time with Him, where He is really truly present, body, soul and divinity. When I kneel in front of the Blessed Sacrament, I feel so much peace and joy, and I really feel Jesus’ love for me. Please, please, make time for regular Adoration, you won’t regret it.

Here’s a prayer you could say in front of the Blessed Sacrament:
O Jesus of mine, Saviour of the world, help me to love You more. Help me to grow in my love for You. Fill my heart with Your Love and Compassion, so that I can attain the Graces to love You in the way that You love me. Fill my ungrateful soul with a deep and abiding love for You and all that You represent. By the Power of Your Graces help me to love my neighbour as You love every child of God and to show compassion to those who are in need of Your Love and who are without faith. Unite me in union with You, so that I can lead the Christian life, which You taught us by Your example during Your Time on Earth.
Jesus, I trust in You. Help me to love You more. Fill me with the confidence to surrender in full and final union with You. Help me to grow my trust in You during difficult times. Fill me with Your Peace. I come to You, dear Jesus, as a child, free of all worldly ties; free of all conditions and I hand You over my will to do with it as You see fit for the sake of my own and that of other souls. Amen.

Another piece of advice I can offer is when you pray at home, have an image of Him or a crucifix, in front of you, to remind you that He is real, He is listening to you in this moment, and that He loves you.

Sorry for the long post! I hope I helped, God bless you.
 
Take a slow walk with Jesus through on of the longer Gospels. Be there with him.
 
Miriam, I have read the gospels time and again, but I got to know Jesus more after reading the Divine Mercy booklet wherein Fr. George Kosicki introduced and arranged the passages from the Diary of St. Faustina.

Upon reading the very words of Jesus to St. Faustina, something very profound happened to me. It was as if Jesus was speaking directly to my mind, heart, and soul. I then took it upon myself to follow the desires that Jesus expressed to St. Faustina:

First, to spread the honor of His mercy–I distributed copies of the divine mercy chaplet (which I myself encoded) to people I know, even to strangers.

Second, to venerate His divine mercy image. I pray before this image daily. This is an image of Jesus with rays of red and pale light streaming from the area around His heart, with the signature: Jesus, I trust in you. Jesus said:

“I promise that the soul that will venerate this image will not perish. I also promise victory over its enemies already here on earth, especially at the hour of death.”

Third, to pray the divine mercy chaplet unceasingly. I pray the chaplet daily with reverence and great faith in His mercy.

Fourth, to celebrate the divine mercy Sunday by going to confession and receiving Holy Communion. I do this every year. I also pray the divine mercy novena.

Fifth, to remember the Hour of Great Mercy. Jesus desires that at three o’ clock, we implore His mercy, especially for sinners, and if only for a brief moment, immerse ourselves in His Passion, particularly in His abandonment at the moment of agony. He also desires that we pray the Stations of the Cross, provided our duties permit it.

Miriam, taking these steps will, no doubt, lead you closer to Jesus. I will be praying for you.
 
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