God is silent. And I am lost

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Everything that could go wrong, has gone wrong. I do not know what to do anymore. My faith is slowly melting away because I feel God is no longer listening to me. I’m extremely lost. I lost any chance of multiple career choices that I wanted or thought he wanted me to do, spend years of study only to fail in the end. I lost any chance of being with someone I love. I lost friends and family. I feel like he is slowly taking everything away from me and I do not know what to do. I do not know what he wants me to do anymore. its been 2 years of silence from him and nothing is progressing. I do not know what he wants from me anymore. Im loosing my faith, for I see others doing better then me and they don’t even believe in the lord! How many more years will past for me until I find a good future? I grew up in a horrible home. And now am I going to have a horrible adulthood aswell? I have done the right thing since I was young, on my own. I am older now. My faith was so strong. But it is slowly melting away as I see I make no progression with him. I feel abandon from him. I feel he isnt there anymore and the things I might have thought was him speaking to me, were just coinsidences that led me here. How long do I have to stay lost? Must I give him up for me to establish a better life just as my neighbors have done? I know this life isnt forever. But I was born in a broken family that have hurt me physically and mentally. Once I escaped trying to get better, and God shuts all doors on me? Was I born to suffer? Is he even listening to me?
 
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Yes, He is listening. Please speak to your priest. I also suggest seeing your doctor for a physical. Many of us have been where you are, and I am one.
I do suggest you get involved with a group that focuses on doing good for the community. There are many options out there. Nothing helps you more than helping others.
God Bless!
 
food, your post is heartbreaking, and I’ve said a prayer for you.

God loves you so much! You’ve suffered from so many setbacks that it’s hard to hear Him, but He still loves you and has a plan for your life that will help you to become more and more holy and help get you to heaven!

You need to find someone to talk to about this, someone that you can share freely with and get sympathy and practical help. I agree with Convert3 that a priest is a good person to start with. Make an appointment please–tomorrow is Veterans Day so the parish offices will be closed, but on Tuesday morning, call a parish and make an appointment. Tell them that you are having a very tough time with life right now and desperately need to talk things over and get some help getting your faith back, as well as practical help knowing what to do next.

If your priest doesn’t seem to understand you, ask to speak to another priest–not all priests are good counselors (everyone has their own gifts from the Lord, and YOU have gifts, too, honest!)

Please find someone to talk to who will befriend you and help you to deal with all of your setbacks. You’ve been knocked around for a long time, and hopefully you can start having some better experiences with your life.

I also agree with Convert3 about seeing a doctor, too. Make sure that everything is working well with your body, too.

I know that somewhere in your area, there are people who will show you love and be able to help you have a happier life! Don’t give up! Trust God, even if you can’t hear or feel Him.
 
I really really appreciate your comment. I will try to go to a therapist. I will speak to a priest as well. Thank you
 
I don’t have much words of wisdom for you. But I have been where you are. Take heart.

I grew up in a home that was godly on the surface, but where rage and blame and control ruled behind closed doors. And I was a child who could not escape, could not fully understand, and could not be believed. I remember praying to God to let me stop being such a bad child.

I ended up having to take time off of college and go back and stay with my abusive family because of mental health issues. I did finish my degree (and an MA) and then ended up working at walmart with it. Not what I’d planned.

It has gotten better. I’m early 30’s with a stable professional job, although completely unrelated to any of my education. I still have a lot of health problems. I’ve had multiple therapists basically give up on me. But I’m still here.

For me, it helps sometimes to read the stories of the saints. So many of their lives were so hard, and many of them speak of things like depression too. We in the modern western world have so few examples of how to live through adversity. It makes people uncomfortable to try to deal with people who’ve lived lives of things we’d prefer to say don’t happen in our neighborhoods.
 
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I agree with the previous posters. I just want to add, though - Just remember that your faith isn’t melting away because you feel lost- faith IS holding on when you feel lost! This trial is making your faith stronger.
 
The following song addresses your concern perfectly. Notice the solo part at 1:20 regarding God being silent.

“The text used in this piece comes from a poem written inside of concentration camp in Cologne, Germany during WWII.”
“I believe in the sun
even when it is not shining
And I believe in love,
even when there’s no one there.
And I believe in God,
even when he is silent.”
Click to expand...
 
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For you to find peace and the Love of Jesus

OUR FATHER, Who art in Heaven,
hallowed be Thy Name. Thy kingdom
come, Thy will be done on earth as it is in
Heaven. Give us this day our daily bread,
and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive
those who trespass against us. And lead us
not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
Amen.

HAIL MARY, full of grace, the Lord is
with thee. Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us
sinners, now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

GLORY BE to the Father, and to the Son,
and to the Holy Spirit. As it was in the
beginning is now, and ever shall be, world
without end. Amen.

O MY JESUS, forgive us our sins, save us
from the fires of Hell; lead all souls to
Heaven, especially those in most need of
Thy mercy. Amen.
 
I don’t know much about your situation, but I will say this: God wants his servants to be strong, so He tests us to make us more reliant on Him, thereby becoming stronger (in a spiritual sense). I suffer from psychosis and sometimes I feel like I’m the loneliest person in the world because no-one understands me. I don’t know the reason why He allows me to suffer like this, but one day I will find out (when I get into the Kingdom of Heaven). Just know that you’re not alone-- you are never alone.
 
I’ve had similar hard times and thoughts that continue to this day. I’ll also guess that every advisor here has had all types of trouble in their lives.

Now think about it Food, if it wasn’t for such trouble, heartbreak, depression, broken dreams and loss would you be here? Would any of us be here?

You’ve been given a great gift: The gift of real suffering.
Without it, would you be here searching for the path God really wants you on?
food said:
for I see others doing better then me and they don’t even believe in the lord!
Click to expand...
Stop this now. ^^

It comes straight from the devil.
 
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Lost a good career, lost our home, our boats, our cars, then my husband became gravely ill and after years of struggle, he died at a young age.

Yes, I know what it feels like to feel abandoned by God.

The first thing I had to learn was humility, I had to learn not to compare myself to others, praying the Litany of Humility daily helped change me. Praying the Psalms, especially in the Night Prayers helped change me. Three books helped me so much, they saved my life:

https://www.amazon.com/Happy-Are-Yo...ssed+are+the+poor+dubay&qid=1573567261&sr=8-1

https://www.amazon.com/Interior-Fre...567284&sprefix=interior+freedo,aps,178&sr=8-1

https://www.amazon.com/Reed-God-Car...eywords=the+reed+of+God&qid=1573567303&sr=8-1
 
I am so sorry. I fully understand you. I hope that I too can become as strong as you. Thank you for your help
 
I dont know about that. It feels like I have been on this trial since the day I was born. The Traumas I still remember since young arnt ones I can wipe away. I prayed to God everyday for years to help me. Until turned 18 I left home. I was very faithful and wanted only to help others who had the same experience. Everything was going great and now it feels like hes taking everything away from me. It feels more like teasing then a trial.
 
I am really hurt. But I am doing alot better thabks to all the replies
 
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