Gracefully Leaving Job?

[Cor_ad_Cor]

Just looking for neutral opinions on an employment situation.

I advised my boss that for personal and family health reasons, I would no longer be able to continue my daily commute (approximately 2 hours each way; been doing it for 4-5 years now) despite being happy with my job. I understood that likely meant tendering a resignation. The reply was that I was a valued asset they didn’t want to lose, and we should explore options for alternative arrangements (that the company doesn’t officially offer, but we would request HR and administration to consider). I was asked to provide my thoughts and a timeline for implementation. This was over three weeks ago. I was told it would be discussed on June 11 with an answer by June 15, my requested transition date.

June 15 came and went; no information from anyone. I have continued working, but from home without approval (on presumed approval, as it was in the written transition plan I proposed). We were to discuss this past Tuesday; rescheduled to today, rescheduled again to next week, all by the boss. I’m beginning to think they’re putting off an unpleasant discussion instead of responding to my request or “negotiating” terms for lack of a better description.

So now, I feel as though I tried to resign and rather than accept, they’ve dangled a carrot and left me in limbo. What does this online community think I should do? Do I continue on the current implied terms and hope they’ll come to a happy resolution soon, or do I make a more firm statement of resignation and take a new position elsewhere (roughly 10 minutes away) to meet my family’s needs without the commute?

 

[Tis_Bearself]

if you really wish to stay in the job, then say to your boss, “I need to make a decision whether to stay or go by next week. I have a hard deadline. I’d very much like to continue working here, but unless I can get an official approval to work at home by date X then I’m going to have to resign. What’s going on?”

If he waffles or puts you off or tells you to give more timelines etc then you will need to make good on your promise and resign - otherwise you will not be taken seriously at all going forward.

If you are neutral about staying in the job, skip the above convo and just resign, explaining that you need to do so for the good of your health and have another offer on a deadline.

I personally would lean towards just walking out if I already had a job lined up. This company hasn’t been responsive to your needs and there’s no reason to think they will be responsive in the future; you have another option; and they may be basically waiting for you to resign because they don’t want to be put in a position of telling you they can’t accommodate you, which depending on where you are and all the circumstances, could give rise to some liability.

Usually these managers take forever like this when it’s a case of them finding the task unpleasant + liability. They kinda hope you’ll just go so they don’t have to think about it or worry about being on the hook for it.

 

[IWantGod]

Just looking for neutral opinions on an employment situation.

I have not fully read your post, just responding to the threads qeustion.

Leaving gracefully is a hard thing because work plays a big part in our sense of value. So it’s easy to imagine how some people would deal with it if they had low self esteem.

I would shake the hand of my employers and say thank-you for the opportunity; and let God deal with the rest. That’s the civilized way of dealing with it.

Others would block the employees toilets and leave a smelly present for the manager, that’s the immature way of dealing with it.

 

[IWantGod]

So now, I feel as though I tried to resign and rather than accept, they’ve dangled a carrot and left me in limbo. What does this online community think I should do? Do I continue on the current implied terms and hope they’ll come to a happy resolution soon, or do I make a more firm statement of resignation and take a new position elsewhere (roughly 10 minutes away) to meet my family’s needs without the commute?

If you don’t want to work there and you have another opportunity lined up, then you need to make your resignation as clear as possible. Make a firm statement and do whats best for your family.

 

[joeybaggz]

Another thread had advice for men. One was, “don’t let a wishbone grow where a backbone needs to be” (or something like that)
Ask for a resolution that you can live with. Anything less than that, resign gracefully and take the position near home that is better for you and your family.

 

[Lou2U]

“don’t let a wishbone grow where a backbone needs to be”

What an excellent saying! I’m going to use that going forward!

@Cor_ad_Cor, I agree with Bear’s advice. Go back and push them for a decision if you want to stay working for them. If you’re more ambivalent, I’d notify them of your resignation.

 

[crenfro]

Once resigned from a job and my employer “lost” a copy of the resignation and I had to resign again, and work for them a little while longer. Be sure to make a copy of your resignation, with dates, and also to follow your employer’s policy for how much notice you have to give.

My two cents…

 

[TheLittleLady]

The only thing I would consider is a resume gap. It could awkward to be asked why you left your last position to say “they would not accommodate my request for XYZ”. As a hiring manager, that would tell me that you might be a difficult staffer.

 

[RandomAlias]

I have continued working, but from home

I agree with what @Tis_Bearself wrote, and I would only add that if they formally agree with your working from home, it may be a strained working relationship. The arrangement may not fully meet their needs. After agreeing, they may occasionally ask for exceptions like coming in for meetings or urgent business, and things could go sour from there. If the job 10 minutes away is a sure thing, I would be inclined to take it.