"Greet your neighbor"

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iwillrisenow

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Does your parish have everyone greet their neighbor at the beginning of Mass? If so, what are your thoughts about this practice? Do you find it welcoming? Distracting? Somewhere in between?
 
i dont like it.im not gregarious or extrovert.besides ,there are worshippers that have facial defect/s and they do not want to advertise it/them or have anybody notice them.some worshippers also come to church as they may have emotional problems,e.g. crying all day and they do not want to get noticed either.ive seen some of them.
 
My parish participates in the practice of greeting one’s neighbor.
I don’t like it. I think it contributes to a horizontal view of the liturgy as opposed to vertical. I’m there to participate with all of the heavens in the greatest sacrifice of history. A perfunctory handshake or nod to people seated around me takes away from the primary focus.
 
MtnDwellar said:
My parish participates in the practice of greeting one’s neighbor.
I don’t like it. I think it contributes to a horizontal view of the liturgy as opposed to vertical. I’m there to participate with all of the heavens in the greatest sacrifice of history. A perfunctory handshake or nod to people seated around me takes away from the primary focus.
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You can’t do both? While the greatest commandment is to honor God, the second is like it.
 
We did that for a while, the former Pastor instructing us before each Mass to greet our neighbors. Most people opted for a handshake, similar to the Sign of Peace. Personally, I thought it was really artificial way to greet the best friends with whom I usually shared a pew.

Note that I don’t feel that way about the Sign of Peace which is a ritual gesture that I make in the same way to everyone: husband, children, friends, strangers.
 
We do not participate in such a greeting at our Basilica. I think part of that is that we have a very large congregation in a well established neighborhood of Chicago. A large percentage of the parish is in its fourth generation; people tend to stay in this area. We have a nice blend of Seniors, Empty Nesters, and school aged families. Quite blessed actually.People tend to know one another, or someone in the other’s family, or from another activity, etc.

This practice may seem artificial or forced to some. There is a nearby parish with a late mass schedule which I attend every so often. They have a greeting and it’s seems clumsy to me. They also have an unusually long sign of peace–as in two or three minutes, with people walking all over. Everyone is pleasant. Just not my cup of tea.

A greeting shouldn’t be an issue, but it seems that it is, based upon many of the responses so far. Love thy neighbor isn’t always easy, especially when your parish tradition is geared toward the sacred. It is usually quiet before mass and loud after.There is plenty of time to meet and greet and eat after mass, which I think is what most people do.

I see the same people at the grocery store, movie theater, restaurants etc. When I see them there, I greet them with “don’t I know you from Church…?”
 
We do it and I like it. It gives people a chance to say “hi”, comment quickly on someone’s new hair cut, compliment a couple on their new baby, check to see if someone’s going to the church function that night, etc. Don’t get me wrong - it literally takes our parish less than a minute to do the greeting and then the focus is all on the mass. We don’t have a lobby or gathering space outside the church proper and most people arrive within a few minutes of the start of mass. So it’s a great way to acknowledge those around you, make that quick comment, and get it off your mind so you can focus on mass - not thinking “Oh, Shellie’s looking great today - I should tell her that I’m glad she’s back and feeling better.” - because you’ve already done it before mass begins. 👍

I’ve also wondered if that minute before mass is why we haven’t had any problems during the sign of peace that I’ve heard other parishes have had. Ours is always quiet, respectful, and brief. While someone might cross an aisle or lean over a pew during the pre-mass greeting - there is never any of that during the sign of peace. 🤷
 
I haven’t really thought about it much before, or whether or not we even have it here. 🤷

Sometimes there’s a brief moment to say “Hi, how’re things?” and etc. Some people do it and others don’t.
It’s nothing official as far as I’m concerned, but I think acknowledging those around you is never a bad thing. Although we’re there to honour God, we need to find a balance and can’t just ignore others.
 
Nope, my parish doesn’t do this and I have hardly ever seen it done at other parishes here. It seems to me that it encourages people to treat the Mass as some social event like a concert rather than preparing for a sacred celebration.
 
Sunbreak said:
Nope, my parish doesn’t do this and I have hardly ever seen it done at other parishes here. It seems to me that it encourages people to treat the Mass as some social event like a concert rather than preparing for a sacred celebration.
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Exactly. They do this at a nearby parish that my family and I attend now and then. Makes me a little bit nuts.
At our home parish the Rosary is prayed up until about 10 minutes before Mass starts. There is always silence before Mass starts; nobody makes small talk with their neighbor, because they all know that the Lord and Master of the Universe is there in the tabernacle before them. So there is quiet…The sacristan lights the candles on the altar and returns to his seat…quiet…stillness…“Be still and know that I AM…”…silence…"…,but the Lord was not in the fire. After the fire, there came a small, whispering sound."…silence…
“For our entrance hymn, let us take number 563 in the Catholic Book of Worship: Praise to the Lord, number 563:”
That is how it rolls. 🙂
 
We have it at one of the Masses (designated ‘LifeTeen’) on Sunday evening.

While at times I’ve liked it, oftentimes it turns into a prolonged visit, or newcomers are ignored in favor of yet another chance to socialize with the people they already know. It can be almost as dividing as it is welcoming.
 
We do it at our parish. I didn’t like it at first, but I found that it made the rest of Mass less about visiting with neighbors especially the Sign of Peace. Now I’m glad when we do it (it’s up to whether the cantor wants it so it changes with the cantor).
 
My daughter’s parish does this, and then there is a call for silence, which is fairly long, to prepare for Mass. To be fair, that period of silence following the greeting is really profound at that Church. I do like it once I got used to it. And there is little chit-chat during the SOP, which is over fairly quickly.
 
A local parish did this. I prefer to pray right before the mass starts to spiritually prepare for the mass. I personally found this practice very annoying then. I think people should have the right to pray then if they choose.
 
It rather distresses me when parishes do this, largely because I’ve found the time before Mass a time to remain silent to contemplate the mystery we are about to witness, rather than to be jarred into the superficial type of conversation that I might have while waiting for a bus. I’ve noted that all the Protestant churches in my area tend to have a coffee hour after their service in which their congregants might converse. Why do we not have this after our Masses? It would do will moving unnecessary conversations out of the church and into the parish so that the Church might be used for divine worship and divine worship alone.
 
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