A little while ago someone at work got me into trouble for something I hadn’t done and I had a terrible time with the disciplinary etc.
I have got to a point where I feel anger and hate towards this person although at work I am able to remain professional it is mainly at home especially when I am on my own that I get annoyed.
Now I am someone who goes over and over things in my head all the time, even if it is something nice that I am looking forward to I tend to think about all the details of it.
I don’t want to hate or maybe I don’t really hate the person more what they have done but I do get angry at home. When I am alone it tends to almost fully occupy my mind.
I do pray for my “enemies” but would like to just move on, I don’t mean them any harm and do not seek vengeance at all.
During confession a little while ago my priest said that being angry only affects me and not them as they cannot feel it.
So how do I move on from it? Being blamed for something I haven’t done is always the worst thing for me and the hardest to get past.
I do forgive 100% but how to let go?
Thanks.
First, Scripture says that what is hidden will some day come to light. If you got in trouble and paid a hefty price for it and you are truly innocent of it, know that one day, those who came down hard on you will know you were innocent. It WILL come to light some day. Just not now.
Second, your priest is right about the anger… it will effect you and only you, and then those around you since how we are inside effects those around us. So its good to want to get rid of this, and yes, I know so well how difficult it is. It can even get to the point of turning into a deep depression.
Third, God can restore A N Y T H I N G. Got that? ANYTHING. God has the power to restore… now, that doesn’t mean he will restore in the way we want or maybe even think He will… if He does at all- its up to Him to decide what is right. But if we turn to Him and ask- if something was wrongfully taken away from us, have faith God has a plan for it. Remarkably, when someone hangs on to God and not the anger, sometimes God can use your wrongful hurt (if you keep very close in God in doing His Will) as a springboard for another’s lesson, conversion or transformation. Turns back and hits them like a boomerang. Maybe not even immediately, but you just never know- and its not for you to know either.
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Haven't' you ever hurt someone, and then later been given grace and lamented? How would you feel about this person if you were somehow able to see that happening in their soul over this? Again, maybe not now, but later in their lives? Is it worth you hurting yourself with your anger towards this affront now? All that hurt... for nothing! And it was more your fault for it then them! We are only in control of what WE do. Be humble and admit the fault, give it to God ask for forgiveness and T R U S T in God. I know, that's easier said, but maybe we just make it harder than it is? Would you not rather be happy and this in the past? God will handle that person's problem.....
Forth, Jesus says “come to me all who are weary and burdened”… you are left with the burden of being falsely accused. So DO as He says! Do you trust in God’s Word? Is it real or is it namby pamby softie cute wishy washy feel good stuff? Let this be a real in your heart, in your knowing. What HE says IS. He will give you rest. Also ask yourself if what happened is worth loosing your soul over? Five years from now, will you be still as angry over it as you are now? (Sure, you might have a pang of hurt in remembering, but five years from now you’ll have new hurts and such) Don’t let it accumulate. Excrete that stuff now!
Another thing: Consider that you don’t know the value of this person’s soul. What they will do for God in their life. What if they ended up doing something for you that was such a blessing… later on… not now… Would you forgive them? Try and see the good in that person, try to see their humanity (that is, their fault, what led them to follow Satan) and have real pity for them, while knowing, with “fear and trepidation” that you too someday could maybe possibly be tempted (even unknowingly!) into a similar sin. Forgive. God will handle the rest. No one on this earth goes unpaid for their sins. If you saw hell, tasted hell, you would be so scared and sad to see even those you hate so much be condemned to it.
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So whenever that pang and itch to anger comes up... think on these things. God's Word is soothing balm. So take God's Word's advice more so than mine here. Read it. Believe it.
OH and I also forgot- WHY are you angry about this? What are you WANTING in holding on to this anger? What is it exactly… examine that. Not questions to be answered here, but in private, for your benefit.