Have absolutley nothing in common with friends anymore

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I don’t know if this is the right spot for this,or not.
But I’m 33 and have passed a point in my life now, where I’ve realized I have absolutely nothing in common with anyone I grew up with. outside the fellas I worked with in my old power plant, or guys from college/university.
The old friends I did grow up with, seem to begrudge me as time goes on making snigh comments about organized religion or God in general.
One old friend I have wants to convert to Catholicism but believes firmly that the mention in genesis about plants ect. is a reference to God giving us marijuna to smoke. How do you even reason with someone like that ?
I stumbled into a Catholic group “Singles For Christ”, I hope to find my wife there, but besides that I now have more in common with an adoration and retreat group that I’ve known for a year (SFC) then guys I’ve known all my life.
Who else here reached this point in there life?
 
I became much more devoted to Gods ways at 32 but was still with a lot of people who where not dedicated.

I did not here much ignorance then as the activist ism of atheism was not as much the norm.

Now at 50 ,the difference in the state of conciseness is so much more peaceful than those that did not sew to the spirit.

I suggest that in private with Gods all knowing presence ask for forgiveness for those that offend you or are ignorant at this stage of (life) development.Over and over again but at times stand up for righteousness. Good luck
 
Jessup said:
Who else here reached this point in there life?
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Many of us reach that point in life, and at about that age (30+/-). Many people at that age are married, start to have children, get settled into their profession, etc. and are very different people that when they graduated high school. It’s just part of life.
 
Jessup said:
I don’t know if this is the right spot for this,or not.
But I’m 33 and have passed a point in my life now, where I’ve realized I have absolutely nothing in common with anyone I grew up with. outside the fellas I worked with in my old power plant, or guys from college/university.
The old friends I did grow up with, seem to begrudge me as time goes on making snigh comments about organized religion or God in general.
One old friend I have wants to convert to Catholicism but believes firmly that the mention in genesis about plants ect. is a reference to God giving us marijuna to smoke. How do you even reason with someone like that ?
I stumbled into a Catholic group “Singles For Christ”, I hope to find my wife there, but besides that I now have more in common with an adoration and retreat group that I’ve known for a year (SFC) then guys I’ve known all my life.
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 Who else here reached this point in there life?
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Yeah I have that. I’m about to hit the big 3-0 and most of my high school friends are people I don’t want to socialize with anymore. Our lifestyles and values are different it’s not wrong or bad it’s just how it is. Spend more time with the Single For Christ group you want friendships that lift you closer to God rather than take you away from him.
 
Yes, I can relate.

When I stopped drinking, my old friends and I had next-to-nothing in common.
When I resumed practicing my faith, I soon realized that I had little in common with my AA friends besides alcoholism.

The only thing constant is change.
 
Sounds like something that is fairly common. I know that there are friends I have that I don’t have much in common with anymore. Add faith and religion and that rift becomes even greater. I had a best friend whom I grew up with- we were very close and shared many values but now we are just about polar opposites when it comes to how we think about life.

I read an article too on how hard it is for people over 30 to make new friends. We are all accustomed to our ways, we become much more pickier as we get older I guess. Then again, I read another article on how friendships get better after age 30 because of narrowed down interests… so go figure that out! Finding people that share your interests can be difficult these days, but I think the internet helps.

When you were a child, it didn’t matter much about what each other’s personal tastes were… you just would play together regardless! Put a kid with another kid in the room and it was like you were expected to become best friends!
 
I just want to say…my heart and prayers go out to the OP and anyone else who feels this way. I am a couple of months shy of the big 3-0, have already drifted from a number of friends and acquaintances from my younger days and am having a hard time trying to find new ones who share similar values in the area where I’ve recently relocated. On top of that, the upcoming US elections seem to have brought out a lot of hostilities in what is already a polarized environment, politically speaking. As a convert, my ideologies are not as close to the majority of others in my field as they once were, though many tend to assume that everyone in this type of environment shares the same political views.

As I was walking home this evening, feeling a bit down, this verse came into my heart:

And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or fields for My sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life.
  • Matthew 19:29
This comes as a humbling reminder that our choice to live counter-culturally, which sometimes includes loneliness and isolation, is a choice that we make out of our love of God. Retreat groups are a true blessing–I, too, have found surprising depths of solace there. And I pray that you may soon find friends (and a faithful spouse, as God wills 👍) who respect and/or share your beliefs.
 
Jessup said:
I don’t know if this is the right spot for this,or not.
But I’m 33 and have passed a point in my life now, where I’ve realized I have absolutely nothing in common with anyone I grew up with. outside the fellas I worked with in my old power plant, or guys from college/university.
The old friends I did grow up with, seem to begrudge me as time goes on making snigh comments about organized religion or God in general.
One old friend I have wants to convert to Catholicism but believes firmly that the mention in genesis about plants ect. is a reference to God giving us marijuna to smoke. How do you even reason with someone like that ?
I stumbled into a Catholic group “Singles For Christ”, I hope to find my wife there, but besides that I now have more in common with an adoration and retreat group that I’ve known for a year (SFC) then guys I’ve known all my life.
Code: 
 Who else here reached this point in there life?
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It is a natural process. I still excange Christmas cards with a few of my High School chums and one from college and that is about it. I bump into someone from the old days once in awhile but we just say hello and that is about it. I have a few friends at Church but no one I visit with but we talk at Church at least and work on various Church projects together.

I made some friends by helping out their sisters for a couple of years who needed some male help to do chores and to sit with a disabled father. So I have friends in the extended family I see now and then.

My nephew has made some good friends through the Cursillo movement.
As for finding a " future " try joining some Catholic Singles groups. But watch out for gals recovering from a failed marriage. Good Luck 👍
 
Jessup said:
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 Who else here reached this point in there life?
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I’m tempted to say: everyone who has ever had a true conversion experience and responded to the call of God.

(My advice: don’t argue with the friend about Genesis, just tell him to let you know when he joins RCIA and wish him luck.)
 
I’m in a similar situation, OP.

I’m only 26, but I lost so many special people when I came to love and believe in Christ during college. I lost all of my closest friends (high school and college) as well as the woman I loved and dated for 4 years, with plans to marry. The Lord blessed me with a new group of friends after joining the university Catholic Student Association. They are wonderful people but really the only thing we had in common was our faith. We keep in touch often but my two best buddies went off to seminary and everyone else moved all over the place. I actually have a large circle of friends and acquaintances where I live now, but no kindred spirits. I can’t find a single other Catholic in this barren city of 50K people that wants to spend time in the outdoors. I also find dating to be futile- my hope for finding a catholic wife is nearly gone. Things look bleak, eh? I often think so, but I have also found a lot of joy by volunteering with the youth group at my church as well as becoming a mentor with Big Brothers Big Sisters.

I pray often for friends. I have no decided that I’m blessed to have some good quality folks in my life and just have the deepest hope that I will some day find a good woman to marry.

I pray that we are all able to find the intimacy we are seeking!
 
I can relate. I literally have zero “friends” now. You know, people to hang out with, go to movies, etc; which I used to do all the time in the past.

The thing is, the majority of my 20s were spent addicted to marijuana and that whole “culture” and all my friends and social circle were of that lifestyle. Now that I’m free of it and trying to do right by the Lord, I find myself friendless at 32. This is what happens when you build your life on sand, my whole social structure was built on the sand of the marijuana culture and now it’s shifted completely away, leaving nothing but a lesson learned. Don’t feel sorry for me, I have no one to blame but myself.

This is not a sob story or a “boohoo me” pity party; I hope this can maybe serve as a cautionary tale to someone out there who might be reading this. I completely and utterly sympathize with you OP and hope the best for you.
 
I first noticed a large difference at about 26 when I first started going back to mass.
I was told by one friend that they can’t make me take communion :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:
But its just mind boggling how many people live like children into their 30’s still believing in a lot of these secular pseudo artistic philosophy’s.
A lot of people worship Marijuana , I can’t explain it. But that is what I’m noticing, its not just a typical addiction its a full blown worship of it. Lately as I have been with my singles group, I have noticed the quality of my life changing. I have this personal Love Hate Hate relationship with God, but after a retreat a couple weeks ago and then talking with some friends over the phone. As selfish and self centered as this sounds. I can’t help but to think that I am more blessed then these people. As a result of having God in my life.
anyway Cheers!
 
DaddyGirl said:
For many people, they grow apart from friends as their lives change and differ.

Re your friend/pot/genesis…I’d say she’s right! Plants are our food and medicine. After all, it is used as an anti-nauseau drug for people who have cancer. For a friend of mine, it was the only thing that gave her relief and she was so grateful for it.
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 I personally interput it as a violent attack on my person, my well being, and persuit of happiness,  when people bring it around me and feel the need to protect myself from it and the person carrying it for my personal saftey and well being by what ever means necessary.  The only thing i've ever seen it do is make people stupid and lazy.
But I didn’t really want to turn this post into that debate
anyway Chees! 👍
 
Jessup said:
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  Who else here reached this point in there life?
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Oooh! Oooh! Me! me! 👋

I am now 50+…I don’t keep in touch with anyone from high school or from college. People drift away and grow apart as the years go by. It isn’t necessarily a bad thing in some cases. But as you go through life, there are times when you will be alone. And then, if you marry and have kids, you will make a new set of friends. And when your kids graduate, you will lose some of them too probably.

But I have found that the old saying is true, if you want to have a friend, be a friend. It isn’t always easy, but if you really desire to stay friends with people, it can happen. I have some lovely friends I see once a year at an annual party I have. They never invite us over or reciprocate, but I still invite them all every year because it is worth it to me.

Good thing for CAF where friends are (mostly ;)) always found and age is not a factor for the most part. 👍
 
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