Have I failed God?

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mr.p

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I still fear public speaking and it interferes with my school, at this point I might as well dropout. I know I shouldn’t fear being judged but I can’t. I also am well aware I’m just gonna be a loser on the side of the street because I have no skills whatsoever. I fear that I’m going to die on a street corner when I grow up. And I know I’m supposed to not worry but I can’t. Have I failed God?
 
The only thing that God ask of you or any of us, is to love and adore Him. As you are made in His image how can you fail Him? We fail ourselves, not the Lord.
 
I can’t go to school tomorrow but I can’t skip. What should I do?
 
No. I don’t want to get judged. I know they’ll get mad at me and say I Need to try harder.
 
Go, what’s the worst that can happen? Face your fears with the joy of the Lord.
 
But I have a presentation. I don’t like presentations. I always have done terrible. People look at me weird and I will be center of attention. I also will have to spend an hour trying hard not to cry as I don’t understand physics and that is my only class that involves any skill beyond paying attention. I also am going to be sleep-deprived all week…I already am only getting 5.5 hours to night maximum. I can’t sleep because I’m crying
 
Fear of speaking in public is very normal…even for adults. I am absolutely terrified of speaking in public and I am in my 40s. Yes, even reading at mass terrifies the socks out of me. That does not mean you will be a failure in everything else. You will eventually learn to “get by” even if the fear is still there.

What works for me when I am “forced” to speak in public is I do not look at the people (unless my best friend is in the public in which case I look at her for moral support). I look at the walls, the table, the paintings, etc. This method “unfreezes” me.

Some say to imagine the people naked to take your fear away. This method does not work for me because I start cracking up. No good for public speeches, but it may work for you. 😊

PS. I also feel like I “fail” God constantly through sin, it is a good thing He is so much better and more forgiving than us. Like Jesus says, none of us will “make it” if it weren’t through Him. So yes, we all mess up sometimes, but Jesus is great and is there to save us, our personal failures included.
 
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You need the help of a professional health person.

Any advice we give you may make your sadness and fear much worse.

You are in my preyers.
 
You need professional help for your anxiety and self-destructive thoughts. You need to speak to your parents and/or school counselor immediately and ask for help.
 
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