HELP...Lost my way and full of despair

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DonnaML

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I am a lapsed Catholic who has not attended church regularly in 10 years. I am feeling the weight of my life and many bad decisions, (primarily financial impacts and am worried about how I can dig myself out of this hole I’m in). I feel so depressed that I can barely function and I feel the loss of God and Jesus in my life as I struggle to face the tough road ahead. I know that if I find my way back to Him, He will help me be lifted out of the despair I feel. My parish has no permanent priest so I don’t know who to turn to for support/guidance and I fear that I cannot do it alone.
 
Donna,

I’m so sorry. Maybe God lead you to this forum to find some support and advice. You definitely will find people who will pray for you and keep you in their heart.

I will say a prayer for you.

Whatever happens - don’t give up, Ok?
Sincerely,
VC
 
Donna,

You are here, you are not alone. There are many people here who will give you encouragement and prayer. There are many people here who have had been down a road similar to yours, I am sure. I will pray for you, and I have one recommendation: go to confession and then go back to church - to Mass - right away! I think God is calling you NOW.

Peace.
 
  1. Start attending Mass again and for your sins go to confession.
  2. Begin praying daily prayers every day. If you cannot afford a prayer book, pray a Psalm, an Our Father, a Hail Mary and Glory be each and every morning and evening. Or pray the Rosary daily.
  3. Your parish can probably help you with food and clothing if you need them. And, someone in leadership might be able to recommend a good financial counselor to you. Priests aren’t trained in how to help people get out of debt. If your parish has a Knights of Columbus council, their insurance agent might be able to recommend a financial counselor because they do more than sell insurance, they advise their clients in other financial matters, too.
God bless you. I will remember you in my prayers today.
 
Don’t despair. The first step is realizing your sins and feeling sorrow for them. Everyone feels this way when you come back to God. You have realized the gravity of what you have done. Trust in God’s mercy. The holy spirit is moving inside of you. He is also patient and loves you more than you know. If you want to know how much he loves you, go read the story of the Prodigal Son in the gospels. This explains how much he loves all of us, including you! In fact, Jesus himself appeard to St. Faustina in Poland in the 1930’s and revealed some very comforting things to her. The apparition was approved by the church. In that apparition to St. Faustina, Jesus said, " the greater the sinner, the greater right he has to my mercy." There are no more comforting words than that.

I was where you are now. I was away from the church and God for a few years. Believe me, I did some unspeakable stuff and I have been forgiven and ammended my life. If I can be redeemed, anyone can. Pray to Jesus to ask him to guide you. Also, pray to Mary for assistance and any other saints you can think of. They will help, I assure you.

I suggest the first thing you do is to find a priest to talk with you and hear your confession. Tell him your story. I have yet to meet an uncompassionate priest. You said that you don’t have a permanent priest. I bet that there is another catholic church or religious community (monastery or convent) within an hour or two drive of you. Look them up on the internet or call your archdioces headquarters and find out their confession times and mass times. I go to different parishes and religious communities all the time because my schedule is so crazy since I have little kids. You may not be able to finish your confession in one shot. 10 years is a long time. So don’t fret about going to confession often. I go every two weeks or a month or so.

Don’t give up! God will not abandon you.
 
Dear DonnaML,

Those kind souls who have posted replies to you have given you such good advice I can only reinforce what they have said:
  1. Go to Confession
  2. Don’t give up.
You may not be where you want to be, but it appears to me you have “bottomed out” and are on the way up. Things can only get better!!

‘We’re one day closer to heaven.’
 
Dear Donna,

I was were you are now. Don’t despair! Be happy! God is trying to get you back. Take all your worries to Him.

Start by going to confession The rest wil fall into place.

I’ll be praying for you.

God bless!
 
Originally Quoted by DonnaML:

My parish has no permanent priest so I don’t know who to turn to for support/guidance and I fear that I cannot do it alone.
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I know of a really friendly and helpful Catholic priest who is pastor of a church in New Jersey. Although I have not met him in person, I have, in the past year, talked with him on the phone about several problems that I myself am having. If you want, I can ask him if he’d be willing to assist you in your situation, at least until you find someone close by with whom you can talk. Just send me an email at mcgeerpa@yahoo.com if you want me to ask him, and I’ll get back to you. You don’t even have to talk with him on the phone, if you don’t want to. You can just talk with him via email. He is very concerned about the well-being of all people, and I have found him most helpful. 👍

Confession, going to Mass are great, and I strongly recommend them, but I am not sure if these alone will totally ammend the situation. The suggestion to get assistance through an organization like the Knights of Columbus is also excellent, and again I recommend it; but I think that what you really need is someone who is willing to take the time to listen to you and give you spiritual comfort, corrective criticism and advice. :yup:

Are there any other parishes around you that have permanent priests? You don’t have to be the member of another church to speak with the pastor. If he’s a good pastor, he’ll be more than happy to assist you 🙂
 
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DonnaML:
I am a lapsed Catholic who has not attended church regularly in 10 years. I am feeling the weight of my life and many bad decisions, (primarily financial impacts and am worried about how I can dig myself out of this hole I’m in). I feel so depressed that I can barely function and I feel the loss of God and Jesus in my life as I struggle to face the tough road ahead. I know that if I find my way back to Him, He will help me be lifted out of the despair I feel. My parish has no permanent priest so I don’t know who to turn to for support/guidance and I fear that I cannot do it alone.
Click to expand...
Turn to God for that support/guidance! That’s always the best way to start. You’re never alone. God is always with you! There’s no need to wait until you can talk to a priest. Go to your room, close the door, and spend some time with God today. The rest will work itself out in due time.

Mike
 
Thanks to everyone who responded to my post. Your words and prayers have encouraged me tremendously. In fact, I went to church during my lunch hour yesterday and prayed and felt, for the first time in a long time, some peace. Today I feel the despair again and realize that I have to open myself up completely to God and trust that He will watch over me and guide me. I have always had a problem with worrying about EVERYTHING and I realize that I must trust in God’s love and His plan and if I make the changes that I need to in order to fix the wrongs I have done, then His love will sustain me and protect me.

I will go to confession this Saturday and continue my rebirth at Mass on Sunday.

Thank you again and God bless…
 
Your despair feelings may come and go with the struggle of life even after you have reconciled with God. However, they will get easier to deal with over time for sure, and you can put your fears and anxieties in their propper place. Just don’t let them consume you and always ask daily for Jesus help. Remember, most changes don’t happen overnight and may take some time and always remember as the bible says “this too shall pass”.

In addition, offer up your suffering to God. God will use your suffering to help other people. A concept that is lost on most modern christians is that Jesus asks us to pick up our cross daily. Suffering will enter your life in different forms. No one is immune to it. It is a consequence of original sin. St. Paul said, “we must offer up our sufferings to God to make up for what is lacking in Christs suffering.” Now he doesn’t mean that Christ’s sacrifice was incomplete or anything like that, but what he means is that Jesus wants us to help complete his mission. That means we are all connected as the Body of Christ in the Church. Another thing to always remember is that St. Paul also said, “the sufferings of this life, pale in comparison to the glories of the next life.” You will be rewarded, ultimately. That’s pretty cool, I think.
 
First off, spend a little time and say a good sincere Act of Contrition. That should relieve you of any concern you may have that you are somehow doomed if you just can’t make it to confession real soon.

Second, ask God for forgiveness and the grace and blessings to continue with your desire to return to the Church. Return to attend masses as often as you can, and make it a point to go to confession as soon as you can.

Even if you do not have a permanent priest, there are priests in other parishes, and even priests online. I don’t think they can absolve you like in a regular confession but in an emergency, they may.

In the meantime, continue to pray every day. God forgives you even if you think He does not. You are not the only one to have wandered away for many years. When I was away for 10 years or more the first thing the priest in confession said was “welcome home”, that made me feel terrific. That was over 20 years ago and I have never strayed away again.

I never want to feel so separated again. The Church is where I want to stay and I want to say to you ,Welcome home !!!

You are taking a huge step towards coming home, don’t feel ashamed or despair or fear, feel relieved, hopeful and joyful that you are finally coming home. It’s been a long time away don’t give up now !.

Christ’s Peace
 
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DonnaML:
Thanks to everyone who responded to my post. Your words and prayers have encouraged me tremendously. In fact, I went to church during my lunch hour yesterday and prayed and felt, for the first time in a long time, some peace. Today I feel the despair again and realize that I have to open myself up completely to God and trust that He will watch over me and guide me. I have always had a problem with worrying about EVERYTHING and I realize that I must trust in God’s love and His plan and if I make the changes that I need to in order to fix the wrongs I have done, then His love will sustain me and protect me.

I will go to confession this Saturday and continue my rebirth at Mass on Sunday.

Thank you again and God bless…
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Thanks be to God. Sounds like you’re doing great! Stay strong. I’ll keep praying.
 
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DonnaML:
Thanks to everyone who responded to my post. Your words and prayers have encouraged me tremendously. In fact, I went to church during my lunch hour yesterday and prayed and felt, for the first time in a long time, some peace. Today I feel the despair again and realize that I have to open myself up completely to God and trust that He will watch over me and guide me. I have always had a problem with worrying about EVERYTHING and I realize that I must trust in God’s love and His plan and if I make the changes that I need to in order to fix the wrongs I have done, then His love will sustain me and protect me.

I will go to confession this Saturday and continue my rebirth at Mass on Sunday.

Thank you again and God bless…
Click to expand...
Thanks be to God - may God bless you and keep you. You will be in my prayers. :gopray:
 
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DonnaML:
I feel the loss of God and Jesus in my life as I struggle to face the tough road ahead.
Click to expand...
The road in life IS tough. You may not see or feel Jesus right now but He DOES see you. He’s right there beside you. He’s never left. Ask Him to hold you now and do the walking for you.

I echo the other posters about going to confession. You will feel so excellent afterwards. Take time before you go to examine your conscience (I write things down) and make sure you say everything.
 
Donna,

I have been in your shoes when all seems lost. DON’T GIVE UP! The Lord and Blessed Mother LOVE YOU so much!! Go to the Blessed Mother, she lead me to such a beautiful realtionship with our Lord.

I began saying a decade of the rosary because that was all I could accomplish. She lead me to the most beautiful prayer life that I never thought possible. She will lead you back to her son in the most BEAUTIFUL way. Hang in there the Lord is waiting for you!

Peace and Blessings.
 
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