Help With Faith

[Karynna_Raye]

Before I write out my problem, I would first like to thank anyone who replies. I’ve posted on these forums several times and am always very pleasantly surprised by the support given. I have, in my mind, converted to Catholocism. After some deep thinking on my part, and some help from forums like this one, I knew that the journey to becoming a good Catholic was one I should take. But I’m having some difficulties in becoming involved in my religion. It doesn’t feel as though I’m really living the faith, more like I’m simply professing to be Catholic while not really being one. I have my excuses that I sometimes allow myself to believe are valid reasons, but truthfully, I am well aware that nothing keeping you from God is valid. Here’s what I have planned throughout my day: Prayers in the Morning and Evening, as well as before and after meals, then to read the Bible for at least twenty minutes before bed. However, there are obviously some very imperative things missing. For one: Mass. I still feel like my mum may be judging me on this issue: she supported my involvment in Paganism, and I have these insecurities in the back of my mind that she believes I don’t know what I want, and because my mum and I are so close, it makes me really uncomfortable discussing the Catholic faith to her. Any ideas as to how I might bring this out into the open? I’m afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing…My family and I used to attend Mass together, but lately my mum has expressed her reasons for not going: she states that she cannot support a church who would allow the coverup of sexual abuse. In my mind, I see her point, but however, I feel as though not attending Church is wrong. You’re there to support God, and not going is more of a personal affront to God than it is to past mistakes the Church may or may not have made. As a child, Mass was always attended as a family, and attending by myself feels like I’m somehow pushing my family away. Am I wrong to feel this way? And Confession…There are things I’m far too ashamed to Confess…Any suggestions on how I may calm myself enough to go??? How do I really become involved in this religion? Is the absence of Confession and Mass so damaging that it could cause this feeling of not really living my faith? Or is it something else, like not being able to discuss it with anyone really invovled???
Thank you for your time.
Love Always and From,
Karynna Raye

 

[kmmd]

Karynna,

The correct thing to do would be to go to confession this afternoon and Mass tomorrrow morning. That having been said I understand that you are have some problems doing what you know to be right. There are two people who are always there for you…Jesus and Mary. If you can’t bring your self to go to confession this afternoon and you have the time, why not just slip into the church and spend some time before the Blessed Sacrament? Jesus is obviously calling you home to him. Bring these questions to him, give him your complete trust and see what happens. This is the man who cured leppers and made blind men see. Surely he will do something for you. Have faith.

And know that I, a repented sinner myself will offer a rosary today for you and ask Mary to lead you to her Son.

God bless you.

Kathy

 

[Teresa9]

Dear friend

Jesus is the best friend you have ( this best friend Jesus, died for you, even if you were the only person alive on the planet, He would have still died for you) and a best friend loves you no matter what you have done, a best friend accepts you as you are and when you make a deep heartfelt apology and intend not to hurt that friend again, that friend, who is Jesus, cannot do anything but forgive you, take you in His arms and be glad you came back to Him as the good friend you are to Him and have a loving friendship once again. This is what confession does, as well as bring you peace in your very soul and also make your soul as white as snow again. The Priest is the vechile by the power of the Holy Spirit to bring Jesus to you and give you forgiveness because you so love your Lord Jesus and God your Father you have repented, so don’t worry about seeing another human being, because it is not the human being you are seeing, it is his office as a Priest that makes Him able through the Holy Spirit and Jesus to forgive you,there is no need to be afraid, you are meeting with Jesus via the Priest. Make your confession in the confidence of your Lord who has done more difficult things for you and loves you no matter what. Also remember that Priests have heard all manner of sins, no sin that they have not heard, you won’t shock him or make him appalled, he has heard all the sins you can imagine, the Priest will be filled with joy you have come to make your friendship whole with Jesus again.

Then go to Mass. You have nothing to fear, even if people comment, even if your Mum though she loves you greatly cannot forgive the Church for it’s sins, satan so wishes to drive people from the Eucharist!! Those sins committed by the Priests were wrong and possibly how they were handled was wrong, but just because the Church does a wrong does not mean that our Lord is wrong and you will not find our Lord Real and Present in the fullness of truth anywhere outside of Catholicism (including other rites of Catholicism as they have the Real Presence also and are in union with Rome) You as a human yourself have sinned, so have I also, those Priests sinned, theirs are mortal sins , but if they have repented they also are forgiven in Christ Jesus…do not let the sins of another chase you away from your Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament.

Dear friend, first and foremost you have a grave responsibility for your own soul, no matter what other people may say or do to you. I will pray for you and for your part, pray to the Holy Spirit to guide and enlighten you in this. Everyone has their own individual way of praying and whatever brings you into close conversation with God the Father, the Holy Spirit and Jesus is ok, there is no wrong way to pray, so if praying before and after meals and reading Sacred Scripture is your way of talking with God, then that is excellent and good. Once you have made your confession you might like to ask your Priest about other ways of praying if you feel the need to, but if not, your way is your way and God the Father loves it, He loves it when any of His children pray to Him, be it once a day or all day, He never tires of it and loves your company.

Jesus said…whoever recognises me before men I will recognise before my Father (this is paraphrased) but this is what He said, so don’t be afraid. I truly feel if you want to live your faith to the full, keep all of the sacraments pertaining to you (being baptised, confession , Eucharist) and then give the love and kindness of Jesus to all people you meet, you will not go wrong if you do this.

God Bless you and much love and peace to you

Teresa

 

[AlanFromWichita]

Karynna_Raye:

You’re there to support God, and not going is more of a personal affront to God than it is to past mistakes the Church may or may not have made. As a child, Mass was always attended as a family, and attending by myself feels like I’m somehow pushing my family away. Am I wrong to feel this way?

I look at Mass more of a time to receive God, and not going causes you to miss a connection. Your feelings are not right or wrong, but they can be good signposts. If you are so caught up in religious activity that you avoid them for hours a day when they would like to be visiting with you, then maybe you are pushing them away. Going to Mass, in and of itself, doesn’t seem like something to “push the away” unless they are deeply offended by it or unless you lord it over them and start to think you are better than them. From the way you write, I don’t suspect this to be a big problem. Perhaps you can “compromise” with your mum that you will not contribute money for a period of time. I take it from the way you write that you are still living with her. Can you get to Mass on your own, or would your family need to bring you?

And Confession…There are things I’m far too ashamed to Confess…Any suggestions on how I may calm myself enough to go??? How do I really become involved in this religion? Is the absence of Confession and Mass so damaging that it could cause this feeling of not really living my faith? Or is it something else, like not being able to discuss it with anyone really invovled???
Thank you for your time.
Love Always and From,
Karynna Raye

Like Teresa said, you are not likely to shock the priest. The more ashamed you are the more blessed you will feel when you receive the mercy in the confessional. Have you been to confession before, or would it be your first time?

Alan

 

[foolintherain]

Karynna_Raye:

…but lately my mum has expressed her reasons for not going: she states that she cannot support a church who would allow the coverup of sexual abuse.

Just quickly I would make sure that she realizes she’s not alone on this. She can’t support a church that allows the coverup of sexual abuse and neither can you nor any catholic. That’s not the church I support, it doesn’t keep me from faith in Her though.

Someone said, I think on another forum, “you shouldn’t judge a faith based on the actions of the faithless… you judge it on the actions of the faithful”.

 

[Teresa9]

Someone said, I think on another forum, “you shouldn’t judge a faith based on the actions of the faithless… you judge it on the actions of the faithful”.

Dear friend

While I see that your tone is helpful and supportive I would just like to say something on the points you have made. No-one supports any sin, of course not, but to say because someone sins they are ‘faithless’ is inaccurate. The mortal sin of anyone seperates them from God (until their sins are repented, confessed and forgiven) but it does not make them faithless if they do sin. We shouldn’t judge the Church on the actions of it’s members at all, the church is the embodiment of Jesus Christ, it is His bride and it is made up of sinners and saints. The Church is the body of Christ and as such is right in this and this alone, sustained and centered around the Eucharist and lead by the Holy Spirit. Whoever the members are of the church is regardless, whatever their actions are is regardless, the Church is true and good because it is Christ’s Church.

Many have fell away from the Church because they are ashamed of the sins committed by the Priests involved, but if we could see into the hearts of every person in the Church there would be many more sins if not equal, just as bad or less so…either way it does not excuse a person from leaving the faith because they do not like the actions of a few of the Priests who unfortunately have brought scandal upon the Church. People forget the humanity of priests and that they as other humans are capable of sin, to whatever degree, either way whatever the degree of their sin is God loves them always and so should we.

There is no person on God’s earth, no matter how bad their sins are could make me leave My Lord Jesus Christ’s Church. To leave the church because of someone else’s sins is a lack of faith oneself, that that faith can be taken from you by the act of another.

God Bless you and much love and peace to you

Teresa

 

[MikeB]

Karynna, reading your post was beautiful in the sense that the Holy Spirit is calling you back home to the Church founded by Jesus Christ. You do not mention your age but in a loving way tell your mother that she is not alone in expressing her feeling over the priest scandals. What greater victory did Satan achieve than to turn so many Catholics against their faith over this. Here we see the very persons given the ability to be the vehicle that God uses to change bread and wine into the Real Presence of Jesus’ Body and Blood. Tell your mother that the Church is not simply the authority but the Catholic Church, the Body of Christ is you and your mother and all followers of Jesus Christ. We are the Catholic Church. This scandal and any to follow still prove the point Jesus made in Matthew 16:18 that the gates of Hell shall not prevail against the church He founded on the rock, Peter. Satan is at work, let no one tell you otherwise.

As to confession, believe that all of us think that it is hard to do. Also know that afterwards we all wonder why we don’t do it more often. The emotional relief is impossible to describe. Go to the Priest at your parish and talk to him about it. You will not be disappointed. If by chance this priest is not understanding, then find another parish and talk to that priest.

Next, go to Mass. Go to Mass every chance you get. Kneel down and look towards the red candle and know that Jesus Christ is with you and He will give you the courage and grace to handle the negative comments if any arise.

Finally, if you have been to Confession and made an “heartfelt” Act of Contrition then by all means recieve the Eucharist at Mass. If possible receive both the Body and Blood. As you are standing in line look up at the Body of Christ hanging on the Cross and think about the sacrifice He made for you and believe that the Host and the Wine are the Body and Blood. Say to yourself that you truly believe that you are receiving the Body and Blood, say “It is truely you Lord”. Do not be shocked if the Holy Spirit pours over you and as you kneel down in your pew the tears well up in your eyes out of the greatest joy you have ever felt.

Let us know how it is going and know that all of the posts in reponse to your post will be praying for you and also for your mother.

Peace and Joy In Christ
Mike

 

[MikeB]

Karynna, I ran across an excellent web address for Confession. Hope this helps.

catholic-pages.com/penance/examine.asp

I noticed that your are in High School and that you were in Wicca. I feel certain that your Priest will not be shocked by your confession. The sins you confess will touch his heart with the sincerity you project.

You are in my prayers
Mike

 

[Karynna_Raye]

Originally posted by AlanFromWitchita
Can you get to Mass on your own, or would your family need to bring you?

Originally posted by AlanFromWitchita
Have you been to confession before, or would it be your first time?

In answer to your questions…
In order to attend Mass, I would likely have to get a ride from my dad or mum. We live in a small town, however, my dad is rather overprotective and would not allow me to walk alone.
I’ve been to Confession before, and have felt the lightness that many of you replying have described, but I’ve never felt as committed to confessing what I have, even when I have confessed in the past, never spoken of. That is part of my problem, as I haven’t completely cleansed myself of sin before recieving Eucharist in the past, largely because of my own shame. I realize now what I didn’t then, that my actions were sinful in perhaps the most extreme of ways. Although I eventually gathered the courage to tell someone what was going on, and in turn a Priest did tell me that I had in fact not been in Mortal sin, I had still recieved my First Holy Communion while under the impression that I was under mortal sin, which is just as sinful as the first action. I suppose my fear of Confession, and of recieving Eucharist, stems from the fact that I could defame such a sacred action in the past, just to preserve my pride.I have since then changed my perception, but to think I was that way…well, it brings alot of questions to my mind about rather or not I really deserve to recieve the Eucharist. I know that confessing, truthfully and in full, my past actions would enable me to once again take part in such a sacred and (name removed by moderator)erative activity, but as I’m sure you can see, the guilt has been well earned.
Thank you,
Love Always and From,
Karynna Raye.

 

[Karynna_Raye]

I’d almost forgotten…

Thanks for the website Mike B., and the advice I’ve recieved thus far from everyone, it’s great to see the amount of support the Catholic Community gives eachother.

You’ll be in my prayers.

Love Always and From,
Karynna Raye

 

[Karynna_Raye]

Originally posted by AlanFromWitchita
Can you get to Mass on your own, or would your family need to bring you?

Originally posted by AlanFromWitchita
Have you been to confession before, or would it be your first time?

In answer to your questions…
In order to attend Mass, I would likely have to get a ride from my dad or mum. We live in a small town, however, my dad is rather overprotective and would not allow me to walk alone.
I’ve been to Confession before, and have felt the lightness that many of you replying have described, but I’ve never felt as committed to confessing what I have, even when I have confessed in the past, never spoken of. That is part of my problem, as I haven’t completely cleansed myself of sin before recieving Eucharist in the past, largely because of my own shame. I realize now what I didn’t then, that my actions were sinful in perhaps the most extreme of ways. Although I eventually gathered the courage to tell someone what was going on, and in turn a Priest did tell me that I had in fact not been in Mortal sin, I had still recieved my First Holy Communion while under the impression that I was under mortal sin, which is just as sinful as the first action. I suppose my fear of Confession, and of recieving Eucharist, stems from the fact that I could defame such a sacred action in the past, just to preserve my pride.I have since then changed my perception, but to think I was that way…well, it brings alot of questions to my mind about rather or not I really deserve to recieve the Eucharist. I know that confessing, truthfully and in full, my past actions would enable me to once again take part in such a sacred and (name removed by moderator)erative activity, but as I’m sure you can see, the guilt has been well earned.
Thank you,
Love Always and From,
Karynna Raye.

 

[Teresa9]

Dear friend

Karynna, do you believe God loves you, not just as we perceive love, but infinitely loves you? If you do, then do not let anything even your shame or guilt you feel rightly or wrongly keep you from Him. I think you are being hard on yourself, you cannot commit a mortal sin unless you entirely wish to seperate yourself from God, I don’t think for one minute you wish to do that. The persepective you need to first know in your heart is this, even in the worst sins of humanity God still loves each and every person equally at all times. Your Father in Heaven is infinitely merciful and His love for you and all people of every race, creed and colour is infinite, enduring always and beyond anything you can imagine, Your Father desires all souls to be with Him, that none will be lost. Trust Him in His sacraments and have no fear, because you as His child and daughter should feel able to run to His arms and be embraced, to receive His love as well as give Him love.

You have sinned and you are sorry so obtain the absolution your Father so desires to give you that He gave His only Son for the atonement of my sins, yours and all of humanities.Then once you have confeesed them drop them, learn from them and try not to repeat them, remind yourself of your weak humanity by them, but drop them dear friend, because only satan would take great joy in reminding you of them, as far as the Lord is concerned , what is bound on earth is bound in Heaven, what is forgiven you here is forgiven in heaven , you will not stand a trail for those sins you confess now on earth, isn’t this a great joy!!! It is a wonderful joy and good news and this is all because of your Lord Jesus.

Repent!! This is what our Lord so tried to tell all, because in Him and repentance is life!! Repent, what JOY!!!

God Bless you and much love and peace to you

Teresa

 

[AlanFromWichita]

Karynna_Raye:

but as I’m sure you can see, the guilt has been well earned.

Dear Karynna_Raye,

You are just too cool! Actually I couldn’t see that, but I just looove the way you worded it!

One thing, like a fish in water, many cradle Catholics who never strayed very far really don’t know what Catholic Church looks like. Since you have now seen her from the “outside the box” as it were, and now see her beauty you are bound to have a wonderful appreciation. You sound like you are full of joy just itching to show itself.

Alan

 

[robertaf]

Teresa9:

Dear friend

Jesus is the best friend you have ( this best friend Jesus, died for you, even if you were the only person alive on the planet, He would have still died for you) and a best friend loves you no matter what you have done, a best friend accepts you as you are and when you make a deep heartfelt apology and intend not to hurt that friend again, that friend, who is Jesus, cannot do anything but forgive you, take you in His arms and be glad you came back to Him as the good friend you are to Him and have a loving friendship once again. This is what confession does, as well as bring you peace in your very soul and also make your soul as white as snow again. The Priest is the vechile by the power of the Holy Spirit to bring Jesus to you and give you forgiveness because you so love your Lord Jesus and God your Father you have repented, so don’t worry about seeing another human being, because it is not the human being you are seeing, it is his office as a Priest that makes Him able through the Holy Spirit and Jesus to forgive you,there is no need to be afraid, you are meeting with Jesus via the Priest. Make your confession in the confidence of your Lord who has done more difficult things for you and loves you no matter what. Also remember that Priests have heard all manner of sins, no sin that they have not heard, you won’t shock him or make him appalled, he has heard all the sins you can imagine, the Priest will be filled with joy you have come to make your friendship whole with Jesus again.

Then go to Mass. You have nothing to fear, even if people comment, even if your Mum though she loves you greatly cannot forgive the Church for it’s sins, satan so wishes to drive people from the Eucharist!! Those sins committed by the Priests were wrong and possibly how they were handled was wrong, but just because the Church does a wrong does not mean that our Lord is wrong and you will not find our Lord Real and Present in the fullness of truth anywhere outside of Catholicism (including other rites of Catholicism as they have the Real Presence also and are in union with Rome) You as a human yourself have sinned, so have I also, those Priests sinned, theirs are mortal sins , but if they have repented they also are forgiven in Christ Jesus…do not let the sins of another chase you away from your Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament.

Dear friend, first and foremost you have a grave responsibility for your own soul, no matter what other people may say or do to you. I will pray for you and for your part, pray to the Holy Spirit to guide and enlighten you in this. Everyone has their own individual way of praying and whatever brings you into close conversation with God the Father, the Holy Spirit and Jesus is ok, there is no wrong way to pray, so if praying before and after meals and reading Sacred Scripture is your way of talking with God, then that is excellent and good. Once you have made your confession you might like to ask your Priest about other ways of praying if you feel the need to, but if not, your way is your way and God the Father loves it, He loves it when any of His children pray to Him, be it once a day or all day, He never tires of it and loves your company.

Jesus said…whoever recognises me before men I will recognise before my Father (this is paraphrased) but this is what He said, so don’t be afraid. I truly feel if you want to live your faith to the full, keep all of the sacraments pertaining to you (being baptised, confession , Eucharist) and then give the love and kindness of Jesus to all people you meet, you will not go wrong if you do this.

God Bless you and much love and peace to you

Teresa

Does anyone else, like I do, see the HOLY SPIRIT speaking through a person here?
Who could have said this better.

Please be attentive!
smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/17/17_1_14.gif

 

[Karynna_Raye]

Originally posted by robertaf
Does anyone else, like I do, see the HOLY SPIRIT speaking through a person here?
Who could have said this better.

I couldn’t agree with you more! I always love reading her replies, as they seem to ring with a truth I rarely see captured.

Originally posted by AlanFromWitchita
*You are just too cool! Actually I couldn’t see that, but I just looove the way you worded it!
*

And thank you for the compliment Alan, it means alot

Love Always and From,
Karynna Raye

 

[Ter]

Karynna_Raye:

well, it brings alot of questions to my mind about rather or not I really deserve to recieve the Eucharist.

Hi Karynna,
Just on the above point NO ONE deserves to recieve the Eucharist. The greatest saints of the past didn’t deserve to receive the Eucharist and most of them were very aware of this. They received the Eucharist because it is God’s great gift to us to give us the strength to live as Christians - it is our ‘food for the journey’. Frequent Mass and communion is perhaps one of the greatest aids in strengthening and deepening our Faith. You could also try reading some lives of the saints, my personal favourites are St. John Bosco, St. Dominic Savio, St. Therese of Liseaux, St. Teresa of Avila.

About your specific confession (not confessing in the past) issues, you should bear in mind that you were younger then and probably not as aware on the reasons/implications etc.
Something similar happened with me. When I was about 13 I realised that stuff I’d been upto (and never confessed) when I was younger was very serious (I had made my First Communion without confessing it). Just to clarify, I always knew I was doing wrong, but it didn’t occur to me that I needed to confess. Then after I had realised how serious this stuff was I did it again. But then when I went to confess I was too embarressed to tell the priest every thing. But I rationalised that I had been to Confession so it was OK. I would occasionally be bothered by the fact that I had not confessed but I didn’t manage to make a full confession until I was in college (19 yrs old). So for years I was going to weekly Mass & receiving Communion in a state of mortal sin and when I eventually stopped telling myself it wasn’t so I was horrified. I literally went into the first church I saw on the way home from college and asked for the priest. The reason I’m telling you this is to let you know that after that confession, I attended daily Mass most of the time I was at college (my mother was most insistant that daily Mass stops you from losing your faith). I believe 'cos the more I went to Mass the easier it became to pray & go to Mass. And God is also calling me to be a nun so what I did in the past, is not effecting what I will do in the future, expect to increase my commitment not to fall like that again.

 

[Pax]

Dear Sweet Karynna Raye,

Your request for help is a great blessing to us all. **We are witnessing a great work of Christ in your heart. ** You are one of the lost lambs that the Good Shepherd goes in search of. Jesus has found you and is gently touching your heart by His Holy Spirit. He is simply calling you home.

Jesus has done all of the heavy lifting. He carried the cross and willingly died upon it for you and all of mankind. He is ready to hear you answer His call. He asks for nothing less than total surrender. This seems difficult and it appears to be a daunting task because of the obstacles you see in your path. Remember that the enemy has not yet seen his defeat, and he is probably making the obstacles appear larger than they really are.

Sweet heart, fear not for Jesus loves you. While every Jew had an extreme fear of approaching lepers, Jesus did not. Instead, Jesus would say, “bring them to me” and He would touch them and heal them. The Lord is ready to give you His healing touch. Have no fear of confession. The priest will rejoice in his heart when you confess all your sins. And remember what you will do for those in heaven. “Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance.”[Luke 15:7]

You will be in my prayers at mass tomorrow and in my evening prayers today. May God bless you as you answer His holy call.

 

[mtr01]

Pax:

Sweet heart, fear not for Jesus loves you. While every Jew had an extreme fear of approaching lepers, Jesus did not. Instead, Jesus would say, “bring them to me” and He would touch them and heal them. The Lord is ready to give you His healing touch. Have no fear of confession. The priest will rejoice in his heart when you confess all your sins. And remember what you will do for those in heaven. “Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance.”[Luke 15:7]

Even more, the greater the sins, the greater the rejoicing. I deeply and truly believe this.

Karynna, your story brings to mind of of the most touching stories I have ever heard concerning the most merciful sacrement of Reconciliation. I heard this particular story on the EWTN program “The Journey Home”. The woman who told her story was a cradle Catholic who had drifted away from her faith in college. At that point in her life she had a blossoming career in modeling and acting. She eventually married a man who was becoming a successful businessman. They were young, had money, partied…were leading an archetypical secular lifestyle. At the height of their opportunities, she discovered that she was pregnant. Not wanting to jeopardize their lifestyle, she decided to have an abortion. She went through all the steps, and found herself at the clinic, in a room with other young women. At that moment, she realized in the depths of her soul that she couldn’t go through with it. As she was getting up to make her escape, a nurse came in to tell her she wasn’t pregnant after all. Even so, consumed with grief, she went to the nearest church she could find (and through Providence, it just so happened that a priest was hearing confession).

Broken, and in the confession room, she told the priest that this would probably be the worst day he would ever have as a priest, and proceeded to confess all her sins, including the attempted abortion. After about an hour she found herself on her knees crying, holding the priest’s hand. When she looked up to him tears were flowing down his cheeks as well, and he told her “dear, this was the greatest day I have ever had as a priest.”

The lost lamb had been found, the prodigal daughter was dead, but now is alive. Karynna, don’t be afraid. Put your trust in Jesus and confess everything from your heart. No one will judge you; God wants nothing more than for you to be reconciled with him…and as St. Paul so eloquently told us, the entire body of Christ is waiting to rejoice with you with all the angels in Heaven.