Helping someone sin+ sensitive topic

[MaryRita85]

I will try to be the least graphic I can but I have a question about a scenario, and if this is still not appropriate feel free to delete mods.This has really been bothering me and I am not sure if I am being scrupulous or not.
I know masturbation is wrong on the person who is doing it but if you help someone is this a Mortal sin on your part too? For example, say you are a woman and are married. When you are on your cycle, you will not have traditional intercourse (and you have a cycle every 2 weeks, I know my hormones must be messed up…). You are fine with other means, such as oral but know that not “finishing” inside is wrong and refuse (and explain why too)to be part of it. Is it a wrong to give the oral sex and once close to climax you stop and put it on them,in turn they end up finishing by themselves? Kinda like “I wash my hands of this act”. What if you are still nude and they are looking at you, while commiting the act? I know it is my job to please my husband but I refuse to please until the end, if we are not having regular intercourse.
Is it a Mortal sin on both parts or just the one who is actually masturbating?
I’m sorry about the topic and this is so embarrassing.

 

[whm]

If you yourself have no intention in finishing the act (in the normal way) you should not engage in it. If that is not the case (i.e. you intend finish the act morally), I think you should ask about his intentions, if he plans to thwart normal relations and commit a sinful act. You are under no obligation to perform anything other than normal intercourse, assuming it is reasonably requested and not dangerous etc.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

Your husband cannot masturbate to orgasm without sinning. You cannot help him masturbate himself to climax without sinning. You can do lots of things during the marital act, but he must finish inside you, period, full stop. Otherwise the act is not ordered toward unity and life.