Honestly Modesty!

[Juliaaa]

This thread is mosty for pius-teenagers and young adult Catholics (under 27) who relate to issues like this themselves (and not just watch young people get worse and worse…hehe)

Okay here goes…

I’ve mostly seen a lot of Catholic’s in this forum use ‘thong’ when refering to something evil and horrid … as for the teenagers on Lifeteen.com seem to be a little more understanding.

However, I am seeking a few opinions and good advice.

I am looking to add a thong underwear to my top drawer… with a ratio of 1:8 (little underwear to normal saggy ones).

My mother thinks they’re horrible, immodest, and doesn’t approve.

Now I’m not seeking to merely ‘convince’ her, but seek the truth for the both of us. She says she open to me finding out if they’re
“okay” by church standards.

Okay… so for modesty’s sake… I do not intend showing it to ANYone… as I’m a very shy person like that… and I don’t want it to feel “sexy” or show guys to get them “excited” (this one fits perfectly below my jeans… and I’m not about to try and rank it so high that people see it.). Just want it for a pair of lower jeans… they’re much more comfortable than a wedgie from a bigger underwear.

I think that its WHO you are… and WHY you want to do something questionable. I’ve spoken to a few chastity advocates, and they seem to be okay with this type of underwear for the right reasons… (not showing lines, trying it out, ect…) I try not to wear any low-neck tops, skimpy shirts and make sure at least one half of me is fully covered
I liked the person who gave the burka/bikini example some time ago- sanks a lot

I might be leaving out somethings - sorry!

But if some could help me with a few reasonable reasons as to whether or not this is “bad” or not, it would be very helpful to my mother and I! I promise we won’t judge you!

 

[SeekerJen]

I’m piping in to agree with your reasoning. You’re not showing them off, but simply trying to make yourself more comfortable, so why not?

I like to wear them under pantyhose, since they don’t have extra fabric to get all bunchy and leave weird lines and bulges under a skirt. And since I always wear slips with skirts, no one is going to see my thong through three layers of fabric.

I’ve also heard that they are popular among many female athletes, since they don’t bunch up into wedgies during strenuous physical activity.

 

[DJgang]

I give you a if you can even wear those things…If I wore them, I wouldn’t be modest at all trying to pluck them out …ouch…I can’t wear 'em!

 

[contemplative]

I’ve mostly seen a lot of Catholic’s in this forum use ‘thong’ when refering to something evil and horrid … as for the teenagers on Lifeteen.com seem to be a little more understanding…

Where have you read this? …Links please.

My mother thinks they’re horrible, immodest, and doesn’t approve.

You are 19 or 20 years old and you are worried about what your mother thinks of your lingerie choices?

I do not intend showing it to ANYone… as I’m a very shy person like that

and yet your feel that you need to talk about your underwear choices here on CAForums?

I liked the person who gave the burka/bikini example some time ago- sanks a lot

But if some could help me with a few reasonable reasons as to whether or not this is “bad” or not, it would be very helpful to my mother and I! I promise we won’t judge you

If you are an adult and for some reason cannot afford to buy even your own underwear then you should be glad for what your mama buys you. If you are independent enough to buy your own underwear then it is not your mother’s business what you wear.

However, I am seeking a few opinions and good advice

Modesty can go beyond the clothes we choose or don’t choose to wear. Modesty can extend to the topics we choose to talk about or not talk about.

I am looking to add a thong underwear to my top drawer… with a ratio of 1:8 (little underwear to normal saggy ones).

Just want it for a pair of lower jeans… they’re much more comfortable than a wedgie from a bigger underwear.

way too much information…:tsktsk:
Maybe your mama is concerned about something else happening in your life?

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

contemplative:

Modesty can go beyond the clothes we choose or don’t choose to wear. Modesty can extend to the topics we choose to talk about or not talk about.

I agree with you but not in the context of an anonymous forum. If she were bringing this up at the Thanksgiving dinner table to get a range of opinions, yes. We are free to ask all kinds of potentially embarrasing questions here…I love it!

way too much information…:tsktsk:
Maybe your mama is concerned about something else happening in your life?

I think this was uncalled for. I think she presented her question in a reasonable manner and did not give us too much info. She gave us the basis for her thoughts.

Juliaaa, I think if you have modest intentions (or no immodest ones) then there is no reason to think thongs are “bad”. They are a piece of clothing. They cannot be immoral in and of themselves.

Malia

 

[contemplative]

Feanaro's Wife:

Juliaaa, I think if you have modest intentions (or no immodest ones) then there is no reason to think thongs are “bad”. They are a piece of clothing. They cannot be immoral in and of themselves.

Thanks for the straightfoward answer for a not so straightfoward question.

 

[goravens]

I think it can actually be a modest choice, particularly if the reason is to keep underwear lines from being seen under/through clothing.

 

[Juliaaa]

Allo

I do not wish to be a person of no graditude…

Thank you all for your helpful insights on the issue!

Contemplative: Yes, I was a little shy of posting this type of a ‘question’ here… but did so for two reasons.

1. I don’t think I know anyone on here in real life
2. Also my Mother’s wish. She wanted me to find out for her (I did too).

I sincerely appreciate all of the comments made, and the comments that will be made in the future.

Thanks guys! G’night

Ps. By the way, it’s a real cute one (glow-in-the-dark!) BUT! At the same time, only I will see it

 

[12345678]

Hi! I think it is good that you want to find out if it is good or not. Here’s my honest take on it, just my opinion.

Well… I just find them rather unhygienic for everyday use (so that is why I wouldn’t use them). Aside from that, I don’t really see why one would need to wear them anyways, there is a great variety of underwear out there for every need. For example, although I find that low riding pants are not modest if worn with a shirt that is not long enough to cover up completely, I know it is hard to find pants (jeans especially) that are not low, (at least that I like), but there is underwear that is low riding too that fits with them, if that is what you are looking for.
Also, pants/skirts that are too tight, too see thru, or too thin aren’t modest either, which are other common reasons to use that type of underwear. I usually just make sure that you the lines aren’t very marked when buying pants. I wear a slip with skirts, but I check that too. If they are only slightly, there is underwear for that. If not, I just don’t buy it (its not worth it). I’ve seen too many lines of that type of underwear on people to be convinced that it is always a good remedy for that.
Just be careful in honestly evaluating the reasons why you would want to wear it, and also, (I’m not sure if I understood this correctly, so correct me if I didn’t) but you mentioned: “I think that its WHO you are… and WHY you want to do something questionable.” And I wanted to point out that, what is being done also matters, especially if it could affect others.

BTW, I was born in the eighties (so I am in the age group you mentioned) and I do like to dress nice and fashionable. I think we need to set the example that one can dress pretty and attractive without being immodest.

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

12345678:

BTW, I was born in the eighties (so I am in the age group you mentioned) and I do like to dress nice and fashionable. I think we need to set the example that one can dress pretty and attractive without being immodest.

Well, I am just a bit older than her cut-off of 27, lol… and I agree that we can be fashionable AND modest at the same time.

I honestly don’t think thongs are an issue though. If you are dressed modestly, no one will ever know what type of underwear you are wearing. Aside from discussing it on these forums, it doesn’t come up much in real life situations, lol.

Malia

 

[sarcophagus]

At school and work, I have to wear professional business attire and I personally find it incredibly unprofessional to have pantylines showing under your pants/skirts. It just looks wrong. Thongs give you a more streamlined look, though I should hope no one is looking there but i can’t help what people look at. As long as you’re not wearing low-cut jeans that intentionally show off the fact that you are wearing a thong, I think they are a practical addition to any (woman’s) wardrobe.

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

sarcophagus:

I think they are a practical addition to any (woman’s) wardrobe.

What a sexist thing to say!

What happened to equality??? LOL

Malia

 

[sarcophagus]

I thought so !!!

 

[Juliaaa]

12345678, thank you for your take. I think thats how my Mother feels!

Malia, I am full agreement of your reply… 12345678 (pant pant… too many numbers! --chuckle…) and Sarc, your points were also well-said and appreciated

I think this is a great opportunity to figure why we believe what we believe in every day issues…
If we can come up with smart answers that coincide with the Catholic Church, how much better will we be able to deal with these issues when it comes down to everyday matters with our friends and family??

Happy Posting!!

 

[Elphaba]

What I find incredulous about CAF is the amount of people who ask spiritual and extremely personal questions of strangers! How is that a credible method of research? Not everyone on this forum is Catholic; the people on this forum range from very liberal to extremely conservative. There is no guarantee that the answers you receive, Juliaaa, will be based on solid Catholic teaching!! There is a reason Catholics are suppose to have spiritual advisors, parents and godparents. I don’t mean to put the kabosh on your method but public anonymous forums really should not be how Catholics discern correct spirituality or how to live proper Catholic lives.

You should be asking this question of good Catholic women whom you admire and respect for their modesty.

If thongs are wrong - don’t wear them and consider it a sacrifice to be uncomfortable in your clothes! Who said we are “suppose to be” comfortable all the time! How many Saints wore woolen shirts or cinched scratchy ropes about themselves to offer their discomfort for the spiritual aid of another? A true Catholic life is not about comfort.

But then, again, who am I but another stranger offering my two cents!

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

Elphaba:

What I find incredulous about CAF is the amount of people who ask spiritual and extremely personal questions of strangers! How is that a credible method of research?

It is a great form of research, but it should not be the only one. Nothing said here should be taken as the gospel truth. But neither should something said by mom, grandma, or a single priest.

We need to educate ourselves about our faith. I can’t count the times I have come here with a question and been pointed in the right direction. It has been an invaluable resource.

I don’t mean to put the kabosh on your method but public anonymous forums really should not be how Catholics discern correct spirituality or how to live proper Catholic lives.

I see nothing wrong with using it in conjunction with other methods of discernment or as a jumping off point.

Sometimes it is just much easier to post a sensitive topic here where you can remain anonymous and THEN approach your family or priest when you have some idea of where your thoughts are (or should be).

But then, again, who am I but another stranger offering my two cents!

LOL, I’m glad you added that

malia

 

[Elphaba]

There is nothing on CAF that guarantees the responses one gets will be in keeping with Catholicism, as the Church teaches it - only that those people interested in your topic will respond. As I see it, it is a very good way to fish for the answer you want, rather than getting the answer that is right!

You are quite right, Wife, about *learning Catholicism * as the basis for discerning errror. It is incorrect to use a dubious source as a learning tool.

Juliaaa, I say once again, you should be asking your question of good Catholic women whom you respect and admire for their modesty (if that includes your mother and godmother - they should be your first choices).

 

[vluvski]

If a member sticks around long enough and does some background research, they will be able to identify which posters can back up their claims with Church teaching, which are usually on the mark but cannot/do not provide references, which are mostly on target but have a few dissenting opinions, which are more free spirited, and which are outright dissenters.

There is a lot to be learned from many people on these boards, and asking questions is one great way to learn more about the faith. It’s nice to get an opinion that won’t be clouded by past judgements or partiality. I can’t always expect that from someone close to me because they’re already intimately involved.

 

[mercygate]

I would get my jeans from Lands End or L.L. Bean - and not wear anything that is so low-rise that this is a problem. Trust me. Nobody will think you’re fashion-defective if they can’t see your midriff or the top of your thong.

Can’t imagine why anybody would want to wear something that is a guaranteed wedgie! Can’t stand 'em!

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

mercygate:

Can’t imagine why anybody would want to wear something that is a guaranteed wedgie! Can’t stand 'em!

It comes down to degrees of “wedgieness” for me .

One pair of underwear is going to be a whole lot more material stuffed up there than another. LOL.

Malia