How can I change my bad temper?

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dizzy_dave

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As far back as I can remember I have had a really bad temper. I have anxiety and depression but I’m not sure that is the problem. My dad had a really bad temper too so maybe I learned it from him. Doe anybody have any suggestions as to How I can change this terrible temper of mine? Your suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
 
How about exercise? Are you getting enough? And eating well and drinking water? Diet can play a major role in mood and behavior. Too many sweets or caffeine?
How about rest. Are you really getting enough or maybe you need a full 8-9 hours.

Spiritually - are you getting enough time in front of the Blessed Sacrament and mass?

Today (1/06/05) is the Feast of Blessed Andre Bessette and I’ll quote him:
“If you ate only one meal a week would you survive? It is the same for your soul. Nourish it with the Blessed Sacrament.”

(Bl. Andre Bessette)
 
Dave…I wish I could help…I suffer from the same affliction…and I have the same background info as you…maybe someone can help us both. Someone told me to try reciting the “Divine Praises” when I start to lose my temper.
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dizzy_dave:
As far back as I can remember I have had a really bad temper. I have anxiety and depression but I’m not sure that is the problem. My dad had a really bad temper too so maybe I learned it from him. Doe anybody have any suggestions as to How I can change this terrible temper of mine? Your suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
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dizzy_dave:
As far back as I can remember I have had a really bad temper.
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ME TOO! I went to Anger Management classes and got involved with the Couples For Christ Family Ministries…The PhD at the class helped me on a physical level and the men in the ministry helped me on a spiritual level.
 
It sounds like you’re really making an effort to conquer your temper. I give you a lot of credit for that! How refreshing to see somebody take responsibility for his actions instead of trying to find some way to blame “others”. Just remember not to beat yourself up too much or get overly scrupulous–you know what I mean?

And I would personally suggest getting a really large dose of humor daily. . .good, clean, laugh-out-loud humor. Norman Cousins aside, laughter really is a good therapy. Of course it can be hard to find good clean humor, but then again, you’ll be more likely to appreciate something that you work for.

Here’s a starter for you.

A reporter once asked Pope John XXIII how many people worked in the Vatican. The pontiff paused, thought a moment, and replied, “About half”.

God bless you.
 
Tantum ergo:
Here’s a starter for you.

A reporter once asked Pope John XXIII how many people worked in the Vatican. The pontiff paused, thought a moment, and replied, “About half”.

God bless you.
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Nice! Hey Tantum, I thought you described yourself as a serious person. Nice job. We need your humor on a few of these other threads! 🙂

Laughter is a great medicine.
 
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dizzy_dave:
Doe anybody have any suggestions as to How I can change this terrible temper of mine? Your suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
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Assuming that there is not a family “gene” for your anger, then your anger is a learned behavior. Hence, you can unlearn your “anger” behavior. My observation is that angry people almost always graduate from angry families–I certainly did. But, I also made a consious decision to change the mold, but it still can flare up. Actually, now that I am thinking about it, alot of my courage and spunk to stand up for what is right is fueled by my anger energy rechanneled in a constructive manner. Most people who know me nowadays would never suspect that I had a bad temper in the past.

I believe that 1) learning to recognize your anger energy and thoughts, and 2) making it a daily, everyday goal to not give your anger destructive expresion/release, and 3) finding socially acceptable ways to express yourself/discharge anger feelings, and 4) allowing the Holy Spirit to show you any underlying hurts/attitudes that need to be healed/modified.

I have found this book The Anger Workbook (Minirth-Meier Clinic Series) – by Les Carter, Frank Minirth useful for me to develop strategies to get a better handle on my own anger.
 
I suffer from the same problem. When I go back and analyze my temper outbreak, I find underlying feelings of fear, arrogance, jealousy. I pray to the Lord to relieve me of this every day. Every evening I review my day for moments when I lost my temper. I confess my sins weekly.

Also useful is REBT, rational emotive behavioral therapy. You might want to check out Guide to Rational Living by Albert Ellis.
 
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